


Let Me Change Your Mind

by Laziam (MItCheLlInE)



Category: One Direction, Zayn Malik (Musician)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Bullying, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, First Time, Gym AU, Implied Domestic Violence, M/M, Masturbation, OT5 Friendship, Pining, Slow Burn, Smut, close Zouis friendship, no graphic Tomlinshaw, some Nophia fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-21
Updated: 2016-06-02
Packaged: 2018-03-08 13:11:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 59,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3210380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MItCheLlInE/pseuds/Laziam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gym AU - where Zayn does not realise the importance of the quote, "Don't judge a book by its cover" and Liam has a lot of figuring out to do. Is Zayn able to change Liam's mind or will he lose the best thing that he's ever had?</p><p>Also Louis finds out that hiring a new member of staff can be a life changing decision...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Sam for the for the fantastic early encouragement.
> 
> And a million thank yous to the amazing GreenandGreyHooray for being my Beta and specifically for guiding me through the hazardous jungle that is punctuation. You're a star xx

Zayn 

Zayn steps off the bus, pulling his coat tighter around his slender frame. Today is one of those days when he really wonders how he got here. It's cold, it's wet, and it's definitely too early for him to be on his way to work. Zayn adores his sleep, and to get up at this hour—tend to his cat, take the bus to the outskirts of Newcastle and walk for another kilometre to Tomlinson's Gym—is just a little bit soul destroying. 

His mood lightens as he gets out of the rain and lets himself into the two storey building. On his early shift, he is usually the first one here. Though his official job title is Receptionist, his duties include making sure everything is clean and in good shape to welcome the waves of fitness enthusiasts coming through the door. Sometimes he wishes he got more credit (or at least more pay), but he likes it here, and he is grateful to Louis Tomlinson for giving him this job.

It was a chance meeting in a pub when he got talking to Louis, who had just inherited the gym from his uncle. He told Zayn that he didn't really want it much at all, but he wasn't going to disrespect his uncle's final wish. So he dropped out of his studies and gave up on the dream of being an English teacher. Louis and Zayn grew closer over a sizeable amount of pints, and in the end Zayn accepted the position. He’s never regretted that decision. 

Louis is a great boss: he lets his staff be mostly self-directed and, as an added bonus, Zayn doesn't have to wear a uniform—a very big plus in his book. 

Tomlinson's Gym consists of a fitness suite, a studio and a swimming pool, and the obligatory locker rooms, of course. After a satisfactory inspection, Zayn heads outside for a quick cigarette. Running his fingers through his thick, silky hair, he checks his black jeans and t-shirt for wrinkles or spills, and then he's ready to go. 

 

"Zayn," a cheerful voice calls out. "How's it going, my man?" 

Zayn looks up with a smile to see Niall, the resident swimming instructor, bounding through the gym’s entrance. Niall is an exchange student from Ireland and studies sport at Newcastle University, but he still manages to run a number of hugely popular classes at the gym. Clad in a tracksuit and shiny white trainers, he plonks himself on one of the reception stools and proceeds to fix his damp blond hair into something acceptable. 

"Do you have to be so energetic this early in the day?" Zayn asks, but his fond smile belies his exhausted tone of voice. 

"My classes are at the same time as Sophia's today, bro, reason enough to be cheerful," Niall beams. 

"Have you asked her out yet?" Zayn wants to know. 

"Nope," Niall replies with a lopsided grin, "I don't think she quite recognises her overwhelming attraction to me yet." Zayn pats him on the shoulder in a sympathetic gesture and carries on folding the pile of freshly laundered towels. 

Niall really should make his move, he muses. Sophia is a lovely girl who is one of the few full time staff members. She is a personal trainer, and Niall hasn't been able to stop drooling over her since she smiled a cheerful 'hello' at him on his first day. Zayn sees the glances she throws Niall's way, but he thinks it's probably a good idea to stay out of this one.

"Oh, by the way, the boss is on his way in," Niall informs Zayn. 

"How does he look?" 

"Dunno, I just saw his car in the car park. I hope Nick didn't give him his usual bullshit over the weekend," frowns Niall. "I don't know why he insists on staying in that crap relationship."

"You know why," Zayn sighs and stops what he is doing, but when he sees Niall put his finger to his lips, indicating that Louis is near, he doesn't elaborate further.

"Good morning, lads," Louis arrives with a brilliant smile for his employees. Whether or not it’s backed by genuine happiness is anyone’s guess.

Louis Tomlinson is simply gorgeous with a figure to die for and amazingly blue eyes, Zayn observes (not for the first time). However, the idea that there could be any romance between them went out of the window very quickly and was replaced with a close friendship.

"Lads, I've been thinking, and I've come to the conclusion that we need something new around here. More variety for the clients. It's difficult to compete with the big gyms in the city, and we can't take our foot off the pedal." Louis rubs his palms together and leans against the reception counter, waiting for a reaction from the boys.

"Got anything in mind?" Zayn asks. 

"Zumba seems to be popular, but we have nobody to deliver the programme, and, to be honest, I can't pay a lot of money. It’ll be a chore finding someone who only wants a few hours." He puts his head into his hands like he doesn't really think anything will come of his idea. It’s typical, these days, for Louis to go from confidence to doubt in a matter of moments, and Zayn pretty much hates the man responsible for the change—one Nicholas Grimshaw.

Niall scrunches up his face as if in deep thought before flashing Louis a radiant smile.

"Nialler, I know that look," Louis says with apprehension. “What plan that will cause me all kinds of hassle are you hatching now?"

Niall looks momentarily offended but quickly snaps out of it and looks at Louis with a self-satisfied grin. "I know just the person you're looking for." 

"Oh, yeah?" Louis has skepticism written all over his face. 

"It's my mate Harry from uni. He desperately needs a job, and this would be perfect for him." Niall is clearly aiming to sound persuasive.

"And does he have experience? Has he worked in a relevant field?"

Niall starts to squirm on his seat. "Not exactly, but I'm sure he will make a success of it. He's a good guy who just needs a bit of a leg up, and I can personally vouch for him.” After a pause, Niall continues, “Plus he’s dead fit. You’ll love ‘im."

"Niall, I don't operate a charitable organisation here. I have to run it by Nick, and I know he won’t agree to this," Louis says with an unreadable expression on his face. 

Niall looks crestfallen, and Zayn feels the need to intervene. "It's your bloody gym. Nick shouldn't interfere in your staffing decisions," he says with more venom than he intended. 

Louis' face clouds over, and Zayn already regrets opening his mouth. 

"Well, Zayn, last time I checked, I was still the boss around here, and you should just get on with your job. Those towels are not gonna fold themselves," Louis retorts with a clipped tone as he shoves his hands into his pockets and heads for his office.

"Congratulations, you managed to piss off one of the nicest guys on the planet, probably cost my mate a job, and all that before 9 a.m.,” gripes Niall.

"I know," Zayn concedes. "I just get so annoyed with the whole Nick thing. I'll go now and apologise." With that he goes to follow his boss.

"Louis, I'm sorry…,” he starts as he pokes his head around the door.

"No, it's ok," Louis interrupts him, "I know you only want to help, but I just wanna come in here and get away from the drama at home, yeah?"

Louis sighs, gets up and pulls Zayn into a tight hug. Zayn wraps his arms around his friend, wishing he could do more for him. He's worth so much more, but he seems to have forgotten. 

 

.....

The time before lunch is usually relatively quiet, so Zayn is surprised to hear loud voices approaching the door from outside. Seconds later, a raucous group of four appears at the reception desk. He looks up and his chest immediately tightens. He recognises Max George and Ben Winston straight away. Those two were classmates at uni and have always taken great pleasure in taunting him about his racial background, his religion and his sexuality. They are nasty pieces of work and Zayn knows he should just ignore them, but he feels distinctly sick to his stomach. 

Ben's sneer reaches him as if from far away, "Hey, Malik, so this is where you’ve been hiding.” He laughs, but it isn’t friendly. “You like looking at all the fit guys, innit? Are you hanging around the showers too? Do they know that you’re perving, you little Muslim shit?" Zayn's blood starts draining from his face. He needs to pull himself together—'sticks and stones' and all that. 

He takes a deep breath. "Do you need some help? I— I mean, what can I do for you?" he is able to croak. 

"Help us?" Max cackles, "Help yourself and do some exercise; you could do with bulking up. I see you got some badass tats instead,” he taunts, putting sarcastic emphasis on the word ‘badass’. “Don't want everyone to see you for the puff that you are, do ya." 

Zayn physically flinches away from the comment. He wants to retaliate and point out that maybe they should worry more about their pea-sized brains and their inability to finish a degree, but he just looks away. He's better than that.

"I just came for some info," says a velvety voice. Zayn notices the third guy for the first time. He stands there with a pretty blonde draped around him. Despite the unpleasant situation, Zayn can't help but notice that he is very good looking: Short brown quiff, soft dark brown eyes, attractive stubble and a chest that looks very inviting under the white tank top and leather jacket. 

Zayn fears that he might be staring, but he manages a weak, "What do you want to know?"

"Do you have a steam room and a sauna?"

"No, neither." 

"That's pretty crap then, isn't it," pipes the girl. "Come on, Payno, let's get out of this dump. Go to one of the ace gyms in town." She grabs his hand and turns away.

Payno shrugs her off. "Just give me a leaflet," he says, looking directly at Zayn. 

Zayn shoves one towards him across the desk but doesn't let their eyes connect. He just wants them to leave.

"God, he's rude. Shall we show this faggot what he's missing, baby?" The girl, who has an annoying nasal tone to her voice, starts to kiss the guy passionately while she rubs his crotch. He puts his hand between her legs under her skirt. She lets out a vulgar moan, and Zayn thinks he might need to vomit.

When they break apart with an obscene slurping noise, she gives Zayn a sly suggestive smirk. Bitch… 

"Anything else you want?" Zayn mutters while his eyes rest on the Payno guy's slick red lips. He has a plump set of them that Zayn very much would not mind nibbling on.

Get it together, he chides himself, but his dick has other ideas. As it starts fattening up in his trousers, he's never been so glad to be behind this counter.

"Well, if you're quite finished, would you mind leaving my premises before I inform the authorities that you’re disturbing the peace?" Louis' sharp voice comes from the hallway. He stands there with a condescending smile on his face, Niall and the other personal trainer, Josh, lurking behind him. Zayn breathes a sigh of relief. 

Josh and Niall look like they are ready and willing to commit murder. 

"Let's go," barks Payno as he crumples up the leaflet and throws it on the floor. 

"Yeah, too many gays around here," says Max, and they finally leave—but not before they slam the door into the rattling frame. Zayn cringes but feels a weight lift off his chest. 

"You ok?" The concern in Louis' voice is unmissable. 

Zayn is already halfway out of the door. "Yeah, m'alright. I'll go for a quick smoke, if that's ok." 

"I'll man the desk," Niall offers and Louis gives him a grateful slap on the back and Josh a thank you nod as he retreats to the office. 

The cool air feels great on Zayn’s face, fresh and restorative. He leans against the wall, closing his eyes to shut out the world and all its problems for just a moment. 

Big mistake… Immediately a pair of red wet lips appear before his inner eye, and Zayn has to press his palm against his lingering erection to get some relief. What the fuck? He is still burning with anger, but those eyes and those lips won't leave him alone, so now he’s feeling heated for quite a different reason. 'Payno,' the fucking prick, must be a new recruit to Max and Ben's little band of morons, and it’s a pity, really. Waste of a gorgeous bloke. 

Admittedly it's been awhile since Zayn has been with anyone, and that’s likely the reason his cock is so eager, but he can't let the guys see him like this. He won't supplement lonely wanks in the shower with equally tragic ones against a wall. Sometimes he wishes he was into one night stands, but as it is, he is willing his dick into submission before he returns inside.

Niall and Louis are immersed in a heated discussion. "Can you not please just talk to him, and then you can still say no," Niall pleads, waving his hands in the air for effect. 

Louis sighs and relents, "Oh, fine. I’ll talk to him. Send him round tomorrow, but I promise nothing."

Niall lets out a squeal, hugs Louis and fishes his phone out of his pocket, presumably to impart the good news to his friend. 

The rest of the afternoon is uneventful until it's almost time for Zayn to go home. He has been playing Solitaire to pass the time and to take his mind off things. 

"Erm, hey….”

Zayn freezes, there's that smooth voice again. He looks up cautiously from the PC and finds him standing there looking unsure. 

"Come for more aggro?" Zayn spits.

"Just want another leaflet… I really do need to join a gym," the guy pleads.

"Didn't bring your entourage?" Zayn narrows his eyes.

"Those guys, they were just joking," says Payno, sounding like he doesn’t believe his own words. 

Honestly? Zayn is about to say something sarcastic when he is distracted by Payno staring at his arms. 

"Can I help you with anything else?" 

"No, I— I just… Your ink is amazing." 

What? Zayn's heart threatens to jump out of his chest. 

He ignores what he's just heard. "If you want to join, you have to fill this in, and someone will ring you with an appointment for an induction." He sounds almost bored, good. 

"Ok, what's your name?" Payno asks and tries to make eye contact. "Just so I can tell them who I've spoken to when I ring."

"Uh… Zayn, it's Zayn. Will that be all, PAYNO?" Why can't he leave already? 

Payno shoots him a strange look and walks towards the exit. When he reaches it he stops, whispering, "Liam, my name is Liam,” and shuts the door quietly behind himself. 

Zayn only stares after him, then lets his face fall into his hands. 

"Ok then," Niall's voice drags Zayn back to the here and now; he parts his fingers and looks at his friend. 

"How long have you been lurking there?" 

Niall smirks, "Long enough, I just didn't want to interrupt your little moment there."

"There was no moment, you're talking out of your ass, Niall." Zayn rolls his eyes. Niall raises one eyebrow and returns to the pool with a small smile on his lips. 

Zayn sinks back in his chair and rubs the stubble on his face. He really, really just wants to leave. 

Eventually his shift ends. During the entire journey home, he keeps the day's events running through his mind, and the more he does it, the more Liam's image emerges, and with it the reappearance of Zayn's achingly hard dick. 

Fuck sake… I only saw him for all of five minutes. He has to shake his head as he gets off the bus, trying to dislodge the troublesome thoughts. Walking on, he thinks about song lyrics, his to-do list—anything to forget about the disturbingly good looking guy who sent him a lot of mixed messages and then left him turned on and confused.

Zayn lives in a tiny flat above Ed's Newsagent. Ed is popping his head full of strikingly red hair out of the shop door when he sees Zayn. 

"Got time for a brew?" he asks, beaming.

"No, sorry, Ed, not today. Shuri will be expecting her dinner. I'll catch you tomorrow,” he says with a wave.

Zayn feels bad, but he needs to get home. His cat, Shuri, rubs against his legs as soon as he gets through the door. He picks her up and moves her unceremoniously out of his way. She runs off with an indignant yelp. 

Zayn flops down on the sofa and his hand reaches down immediately to free his erection. Mmm…, he moans. He doesn't bother to take his jeans off, just undoes his zip so his throbbing head is out. All it takes is a few rough and desperate strokes. 'Liam' escapes from his lips as he comes into his fist. 

After a guilty shower and something to eat for him and Shuri, he curls up in his bed. This was never supposed to happen again. Wanking over a straight guy… Not again! Zayn hasn't felt this pathetic for a long time, if ever. After a lot of tossing and turning, he finally falls into a restless sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Louis 

Louis' office is his haven. It is small and just barely able to house his desk with the swivel chair—Louis loves to swivel, it helps him think—a bookcase, a cupboard for odds and sods, and a second chair. Now that he’s tucked away, safe and alone, his thoughts travel back to the previous evening. He'd mentioned as casually as possible that he was having a chat with Niall's friend about the new classes. As expected, Nick wasn't impressed. 

"You've got to stop letting your employees interfere in your business, Louis," Nick huffed. "No wonder they're running rings around you. They see you as a soft touch."

Louis hadn't felt like arguing, didn't want to point out that those employees are first and foremost his friends. Nick doesn't get it anyway. He is profit driven and, to be fair, he is very successful with it. Nick runs the accounts, and Louis doesn't know where the gym would be without Nick's cash injections. 

"S'alright, I'm only gonna a have a chat with him," Louis mumbled.

"You know I just want what's best for you, don't you, honey?" Nick frowned. 

Honey… Oh, how Louis hates that pet name. Nick is not a bad guy, but he is slowly suffocating him. Louis moved out of his tiny flat and into Nick's impressive townhouse a year ago. He can't remember the last time he had a burger that wasn't gourmet, and when he looks in the mirror, he sees a guy he doesn't even recognise. The expensive dress trousers and fitted shirts are just not him. It was all quite exciting in the beginning and Louis recognises that part of the blame lies with him. He let it go on for too long and can't see a way out now. To Nick he is little more than arm candy nowadays, and the guy he fucks into the mattress every night. 

"Hi, I'm Harry," says what might possibly be the sexiest voice Louis has ever heard. 

He looks up, shaken out of his reverie, and is greeted by what he can only describe as a 'Vision in Hawaiian Print'. On anyone else this shirt would have looked ridiculous, but Harry carries it off effortlessly. He combines it with extremely tight black jeans and brown Chelsea boots. 

"Nice to meet you, Harry. I'm Louis Tomlinson. Did you find your way here alright?" Did I really just say that? Louis cringes inwardly. 

Harry doesn't seem to notice and stretches out a rather large hand which encompasses Louis' fully. He flashes Louis a dazzling smile at the same time as he runs his free hand through his shoulder length, chocolate-coloured curls. The guy is simply stunning. 

Ok then. Louis is sure that there was a purpose to this lovely creature standing in front of his desk, but this purpose currently eludes him. 

"Take a seat Harry," Louis manages to say, desperate to appear at least reasonably professional. 

Harry sits down with a little chuckle and drapes one of his enormously long legs over the other. His facial expression changes to adorably anxious. 

"What made you decide to apply for this job? Niall tells me you haven't done anything like this before," Louis inquires, finding it difficult not to ask instead if Harry would like to go for a drink. 

"I really need to earn some money, Mr. Tomlinson. My mum is a bit tired of me asking for money, and my student finance is long gone. And—” Harry actually blushes slightly, “I like pretty things." 

Geez... is this guy for real? Harry twiddles his fingers, and Louis just can't drag his gaze away from those large hands. 

Louis wants to know so much more about Harry. In the far corner of his brain, a tiny alarm bell is trying to tell him something, but he simply leans back in his chair and ignores it. 

"So, Harry, where have you worked previously?" he asks in his best businessman’s voice.

Harry looks uncomfortable for a moment, but then his disarming smile is back and he replies, "First in a fast food place, grilling chicken, but they said I did too much chatting with the customers, plus I dropped the odd tray. I didn’t make it past the probation period. Then I had a night job stacking supermarket shelves. You have no idea how boring that is. Everyone was always miserable and they told me not to sing while I work.” He says this last thing like it was a terrible tragedy. “So I quit,” Harry ends with, looking at Louis expectantly.

God, he could listen to that deep voice with the slow drawl all day.

“Well….," he starts, only to be interrupted by a desperate sounding Harry. 

"Mr. Tomlinson, I really do need a job, and I will try really hard, promise,” he pleads and starts biting his bottom lip. 

That’s it—in a split second of madness, Louis decides, “Ok, you got it, but only if you stop calling me Mr.Tomlinson; it’s Louis. I'm only a couple of years older than you,” he smiles a bit flirtatiously, in spite of his efforts to remain neutral.

“Oh Mr. To— Erm, Louis. Thanks for giving me a chance!" Harry beams, "You won’t regret this, I swear. Cross my heart, even.” The enchanting idiot actually does the hand motion across his chest, signifying his sincerity.

Louis isn’t sure if giving him a chance at a career is the motivation here, but he takes it. What else could it possibly be?

Something behind Louis catches Harry's attention. He gets up and walks over to the bookshelf. 

"You read classic literature?" Harry looks at the books with an awestruck expression on his face. "The entire collection of William Blake's poems? No fucking way!" 

Louis can't help but smile at Harry's enthusiasm.

"You like Blake?" Louis asks, marvelling at how many times Harry has totally surprised him in the short time he has known him—quite literally a matter of minutes.

"Yeah, he was certainly a man ahead of his time." Harry takes a volume off the shelf and almost caresses it, which conjures up all kinds of images in Louis' mind. "You know, you shouldn't keep these books in this office. They should be treasured and admired in your home," says Harry thoughtfully. 

Louis' mind wanders back to the day he moved in with Nick. 

"You can put the box with those old books into the attic. They would just look out of place in this modern house, and anyway, nobody reads that stuff anymore," Nick scoffed. 

"They are a part of the A level curriculum, Nick, and I love those books." Louis frowned.

"You don't have to worry about that anymore. Just carry on playing a gym owner and let me take care of you. And in any case, kids hate poetry." Nick grinned that possessive grin that Louis can't stand. 

"They wouldn't hate it if someone would inspire them to love it," Louis remembers whispering. 

Nick's words hurt Louis to the core, but he was totally oblivious. 

"Louis?" Harry touched him lightly on the shoulder.

"Sorry, I was miles away," Louis doesn't want Harry to remove his hand. "By the way, are you free on Friday? We all get together at the Old Queen's Head and you could meet the rest of the crew."

Harry's face lights up, "That would be so nice," he smiles. 

"It's settled then, welcome to the team, and we will see you on Friday." Louis pats his newest recruit on the shoulder wondering what the hell he's got himself into. 

 

.....

Louis pushes open the heavy oak door to the pub. He opted for black trousers and a light blue button down for tonight—anything less sedate would have made Nick suspicious. Once inside, the smell of pub grub and alcohol hits him, as he looks around for his friends. He hears Niall before he sees him. 

"And then I gave them a menacing look, and they took off," Niall boasts, making sure that Sophia doesn't miss this critical piece of information. 

"Oi, what about me and Louis? We were there as well."Josh actually looks offended. 

Louis takes the seat next to Zayn and he has to shout to be heard, "Calm down, lads, we all did our bit! But I did the most," he adds with a cheeky grin. "By the way, I'll have a panic button installed just in case."

They all voice their approval while Louis glances across the table at Harry. He looks damn good in a plain white t-shirt and blue jeans. Louis feels a flutter in his stomach that he hasn't felt for ages.

"That new guy could have stepped in." It appears Niall is still not done with his heroic tale. "I've heard that his father is Walter Payne, that hot shot property developer, and by all accounts he's a bully. Like father, like son," he huffs. 

"Maybe he just wants to fit in somewhere," Zayn says quietly. Nobody hears him except Louis, who pats him reassuringly on the shoulder. 

Harry jumps up and gives Zayn a bear hug, "I'm so sorry that happened to you," he mumbles into Zayn's shoulder. 

"It's ok, mate," Zayn grins, "No receptionists were harmed in the incident." It's probably only Louis who notices the glimmer of sadness alongside the humour in his eyes.

"Hey, you two make a cute couple," giggles Sophia. "You could argue every day over who has the better hair." The pretty brunette looks expectantly from Harry to Zayn.

"Nah, apparently Zayn likes his men muscled and rude," Niall comments and earns himself a withering glare from Zayn.

"That reminds me," Jessica, one of the other receptionists, turns to Zayn. "That Payne guy signed up and booked his induction for tomorrow evening."

"That's during your shift, Zayn." Louis looks at his friend. "If you want me to decline his membership or get someone else to do the induction, that's fine." 

"No, it's cool. I'll do it," Zayn shrugs and throws a napkin at Niall who makes obnoxious kissing noises from the other end of the table. 

The next few hours pass with friendly banter, Niall's continued efforts to impress Sophia and Louis attempting not stare too obviously at Harry. He basically fails.

Around half nine, his phone buzzes: it's a text from Nick. 

Miss you honey, you know I don't like it when you spend all your time with your employees. I'll come and get you now. Xx

Louis' heart sinks. He knows he should end this relationship, but what about the gym? He looks around the table and all he sees are friends who depend on him. Niall and Sophia are the only properly qualified staff members—they should have taken better jobs by now, but Louis is grateful that they haven't. Zayn needs support until he gets his shit together and accepts that comic illustrator job in London that they keep offering him. Josh is financing his way through uni, and Jessica is a single mum who does three jobs. And now there is Harry...

Louis' phone buzzes again.

Almost there Xx

"Gotta go, guys. Off to spend some time with the boyfriend." Louis puts on a fake smile which probably fools no one. He can practically feel their pitying looks on his back as he makes his way outside. 

Seconds later, the door opens again and someone walks up behind him. 

"Louis, wait!" Harry grabs Louis' hand and turns him around. "Why are you leaving so early? Are you ok?" he asks as he moves closer. 

"I told you all, Nick and I want to have a night in." Louis tries to avoid those emerald eyes which are so close to his face. His heart is hammering in his chest, and it takes absolutely all his willpower not to pull Harry in for a kiss. Instead he frees his hand and turns towards Nick's approaching car. 

"That should be all good then, yes?" Harry asks, a strained tinge to his voice.

"Yeah, yes… Of course," Louis stammers. He needs to put distance between himself and Harry, physically and emotionally. 

"Then why are you so sad?" Harry's question is barely above a whisper. 

Louis is saved from answering by the arrival of Nick. He gets into the car and turns to say goodbye, but Harry is already gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

Zayn 

Zayn arrives far too early for his afternoon shift. Normally he would sleep as long as possible and make it into work just on time, but today he feels restless. It's only a bloody induction, he reasons, but the nervous feeling in the pit of his stomach remains. He makes a cup of coffee and when he gets to his reception desk, he finds a miserable looking Harry perched on one of the stools. 

"What's up, Hazza?" Zayn squeezes Harry's arm. The lad may have originally been Niall’s friend, but they all grew close to him during their night out.

"I'm doomed." Harry's voice sounds even more grave than usual. "My classes start on Monday and I know fuck all about Zumba. I'm also not exactly god's gift to coordination." Harry puts his head on the counter and Zayn pats his curls in sympathy. 

"I'm sorry, mate, but what I know about sport you can fit on the back of a stamp," Zayn admits. "Why did you apply for this in the first place? I'm sure you could have charmed your way into a retail job or something with no problem." Zayn puts his mug down and waits. 

"You really want to know?" Harry looks up with a sheepish grin. Zayn nods; now he's intrigued. 

"Well," Harry sits up and leans closer to Zayn, "A couple of weeks ago I picked Niall up from work, and while I was waiting outside, I saw Louis going in. I wanted to talk to him, ask him out, but Niall said that there was no point hitting on him because he’s taken. But I was desperate to meet him, so Niall came up with the interview idea. We never thought he would actually offer me the job."

"You could have turned it down," Zayn offers.

"No," Harry says, looking thoughtful, "not now that I've met him."

"Trust that little Irish git to come up with something like that…." Zayn shakes his head. 

"Are ya talkin bout me?" Niall strolls in from the back, munching on a Mars bar. 

"Yeah, Hazza is just telling me about your little scheme. You should stop interfering in people's love lives." Zayn throws him a disapproving look. 

"Was only trying to help." Niall takes a bite out of his chocolate bar. "And talking about love lives, isn't Payno coming in later?" Niall mocks, "You didn't put that denim shirt on for just anyone, did ya?"

“His name is Liam, and have you asked Sophia for a date yet? Oh wait, no, you're too busy meddling in everyone else's business." Zayn snatches the rest of the Mars bar out of Niall's hand and pops it into his mouth.

"Liam, oh, Liam…." Niall adopts a theatrical pose and blows kisses towards Zayn.

"Fuck off, Niall," Zayn huffs but struggles not to smile at his friend.

"Now that's offensive, Malik." Niall storms out, and the other two can hear him laughing all the way back to the pool.

"I'm just gonna have to look at a load of youtube clips," Harry says, bringing the conversation back to the original topic.

"Have you talked to Louis about it?" Zayn takes a sip of his now lukewarm coffee.

"No." Harry frowns and puts his head back on the counter. "I'm pretty sure he is avoiding me. I don't even think he likes me."

"Mate, if he didn't like you, you wouldn't be sitting here. He just has some crap at home to sort." Zayn doesn't like to gossip, especially not about Louis, but Harry needs to know there’s something going on behind the scenes making their boss a bit vulnerable. 

"Yeah, so I've heard. I just want to make him smile more; I know I can." Harry stands up and smiles ruefully. "But anyway, Zayn, thanks for listening, and I'm not gonna give up just yet."

Zayn wonders whether he’s talking about Zumba or Louis. "Harry," he says carefully, "about Louis... Just don't hurt him."

"And risk being hunted down by everyone in this place?" Harry smiles and gets ready to leave. "Don't worry, Zaynie."

But Zayn worries. 

.....

 

At 4 p.m. on the dot, Liam walks in, accompanied by the nasal blonde. Zayn had hoped that when he saw Liam again, he might not be as attracted to him as he first thought, but that hope is immediately dashed. He looks amazing in a black and red plaid shirt combined with ripped jeans, and Zayn's stomach does a little flip. 

The blonde leans over the counter right in front of him and smiles seductively. "Hey, pretty boy... It's such a waste. Have you even tried real sex with a woman before?" 

Before Zayn can think of a fitting response, Liam intervenes. "Shut up, Ellie, stop making a scene." He actually seems to be a little embarrassed. Serves him right, Zayn thinks. Why would Liam even want to be with her? Admittedly she has big tits and a pretty face, but he could do so much better. 

Liam's voice interrupts his musings. "We're here for the induction."

Zayn wants to laugh. As if he doesn't know. As if he hasn't thought about this every single minute since he found out about it. 

"Non-members are not allowed past the reception. I'm afraid your girlfriend will have to wait here." (Okay, so he just made that up.) 

Ellie pouts and sits herself on one of the visitor chairs. "I'll miss you, baby, hurry back," she chirps.

Liam ignores her and gestures for Zayn to go ahead. Now that he is closer, Zayn notices a dark bruise on Liam's left cheekbone. It looks painful. That's what happens when you mix with the dregs of humanity, Zayn thinks.

He shows Liam first the changing rooms and then the studio. When they reach the pool, Zayn hangs back and stays by the door. Niall waves to them from the lifeguard's seat, giving them the thumbs up. 

Very subtle. Thanks, Niall. Zayn rolls his eyes. 

"Aren't you coming in?" Liam looks over his shoulder to check on his tour guide. 

"No, I don't like it. I can't swim." Why, oh, why did he have to tell him that? Zayn chides himself and waits for the ridicule. It doesn't come. Liam just nods and walks over to Zayn.

"Come on then, can I see the fitness suite?" He stops only inches away and his cologne makes Zayn dizzy. Jesus, he even smells great. How is that fair? Zayn can't seem to catch a break.

"Yeah, sure,” he mumbles. 

Liam seems to be impressed with the suite, inspecting all the exercise machines and free weights. Thankfully he doesn't ask any questions. They pass Josh, who is with a client, but when he notices Zayn and Liam he saunters over to them.

"Alright, guys? Need any help?" Josh gives Zayn a questioning glance and then glares at Liam. He hasn’t forgotten their awkward first meeting.

"No, mate, we're fine," Liam replies in a sharp undertone.

Josh doesn't look convinced, but he returns to his training session.

"Wow, you really have your guard dogs everywhere, don't you?" Liam says sarcastically. "They can't wait for me to put a foot wrong."

"I don't need any guard dogs." Zayn is losing his patience, and here he was just starting to think that maybe Liam could be something other than a total prat. He thought wrong. 

(He might be a prat, but Liam is getting under Zayn's skin, and his habit of standing far too close doesn't help.) 

"Had a disagreement with somebody?" Zayn puts as much spite into his voice as he can muster as he points to the bruise. 

"Something like that." He clearly doesn't want to elaborate. 

Zayn tries again. "I know it's none of my business, but those guys you’re hanging around with are bad news." Not to mention that obnoxious tart, he adds mentally. 

"You're right," Liam says, giving him a cold look, "it's none of your business.” 

"That's it." Zayn has had enough of this. "If you would like to follow me to the front, please, I'll give you your membership card." His own voice sounds hollow to him. Liam, Ben and Max probably all deserve each other. 

Ellie is still where they left her when they get back to the desk. She jumps up and flings herself at Liam as if he's been away for ages. 

Just before they go, he gives her a lingering kiss and looks at Zayn with an almost defiant expression.

What is his problem? And why is he involving me? Zayn wishes Liam would just go and find another gym. At least that's what he tells himself. 

 

.....

Over the next few days, Liam comes to work out every day but doesn’t say a word to anyone. Zayn finds himself lurking near the fitness suite rather a lot just marvelling at Liam’s physique and adding the men’s toilet to the not so glamorous lonely-wank venues in his life. Harry is still fretting over his Zumba classes, Louis walks around with a permanent frown, and Niall is harping on about wanting to organise a party for Sophia’s birthday. Zayn feels that he has been a terrible friend to all of them lately, so wrapped up in his own Liam-induced misery.

On Wednesday, Zayn gets ready to lock up for the night. He is about to go and check the changing rooms for any forgotten items when the door opens, and Liam marches in. Skin glistening with sweat, he is wearing tracksuit bottoms and a tight vest. There’s something slightly off in his demeanor, but instead of expressing concern, Zayn feels heat rise to his face and drop to his groin. God, he looks good. 

“Malik, I wanna talk to you.”

“We’re closed,” Zayn tries to sound calm and matter-of-fact, merely the tiniest wobble in his voice betraying him.

“Gotta talk now.” Liam comes closer; Zayn can smell alcohol on him. Shit, Liam’s not supposed to be here at all, but intoxicated Liam really isn’t supposed to be here.

Zayn braces himself for a fight and says more firmly, “Liam, you’ve been drinking. We’re closed and you need to leave.”

“No,” Liam argues, fixing Zayn with a stare.

“For the last time: we are closed, we can talk tomorrow.”

Liam doesn’t move. 

“Oh, whatever.” Zayn heads for the changing rooms, hoping that Liam will get the message and piss off. He half-heartedly checks the lockers, and when he looks up, Liam is leaning against the door frame.

“Go away, you’re drunk,” Zayn says, almost shouting. He continues with his work duties, but his hands are trembling. 

“I’m not that drunk,” Liam snarls as he walks up behind him.

“Just fucking go.” 

Liam reaches Zayn, grabs his shoulder and turns him around. “Now tell me that you want me to go,” he growls.

Zayn opens his mouth but nothing comes out. “Thought so,” Liam says with a smirk. He casually slides his fingers down Zayn’s arm. “You’re watching me when I work out, aren’t ya. You don’t think I see you, but I do.” Liam’s voice is low. Zayn’s skin is burning where Liam is touching him, his brain is all foggy, and he can only stammer, “I… No, I… I don’t….”

“You’re lying, Malik. I can see you perving, and I can see your precious mates looking at me like I’m scum.”

Liam moves away with a disgusted expression, while Zayn regains the ability to think and speak.

“Maybe if you didn’t behave like a total asshole, they would look at you differently,” Zayn challenges and follows him.

“I didn’t do anything to any of you. You just don’t like anyone who’s not in your pathetic little gay club.” Liam’s tone is defiant, and his eyes bore into Zayn’s.

It takes a lot for Zayn to lose his cool, but Liam is unbelievable. Is he honestly twisting things around so it’s everyone else’s fault?

Zayn closes the gap between them without breaking eye contact. “So you think it’s okay to go round with people who abuse others? No wonder you get punched. And while we’re having this talk, what were you thinking when you practically fingered your girlfriend right in front of me?” Zayn wouldn’t be surprised if Liam’s fist connected with his face any second now. Thankfully that doesn’t happen; instead Liam puts his forehead against Zayn’s and brings his body in closer, so the men are chest to chest. 

“Do you think about that when you get yourself off, huh? Does it turn you on?” Liam’s breath is hot on Zayn’s face.

Zayn moves his mouth to Liam’s ear and whispers, “No, Liam, you turn me on.”

There is a moment of total silence wherein Liam looks like he wants to throttle him. Zayn isn’t sure if he is more scared or aroused, though his dick tells him it’s the second option.

Then things happen fast as Liam lets out a strangled noise, puts his hands on Zayn’s shoulders, and shoves him back against one of the lockers. His head hits the metal when Liam crushes his mouth onto his. It’s kind of violent and it hurts a bit, but Zayn offers no resistance. He lets Liam invade his mouth, bite his bottom lip. It’s not quite a kiss—more like a clash of teeth and tongues. Liam forces his way between his legs and starts grinding his own erection against Zayn’s by now painfully hard bulge. He grabs Zayn’s hair and starts sucking on his neck. Zayn can’t stop the low moan coming from his mouth. This is all so wrong….

“Ever think you m-might not be as str-straight as you thought?” he manages between ragged breaths. He has his hands under Liam’s vest and scratches down his back, and the way he can feel every defined muscle drives him crazy.

“You know nothing about me,” Liam seethes. “I hate you, Malik.” He’s panting now, and he stoops to bite down on Zayn’s collarbone. That feeling is absolutely mutual, Zayn thinks, but he keeps it to himself. Wincing, he digs his nails into the small of Liam’s back in retaliation.

Liam brushes his hands against Zayn’s crotch. What, now he’s a tease as well? Zayn is desperate for relief and tries futilely to reach for the button of his jeans. Liam smacks his hand away, pressing his entire body against Zayn’s. 

“I know that you’re a self-obsessed, arrogant prick,” Zayn argues and rocks his hips forward in frustration.

Liam lets out a little laugh and suddenly pulls back. He tugs his joggers and boxers down a little to wrap his hand around his own rather impressive length. With his free hand he holds both of Zayn’s wrists in a vice like grip. Bastard!

Zayn should maybe try and look away and not give him the satisfaction, but he can’t drag his gaze from Liam slowly pumping his dick. The man’s eyes are closed anyway, his beautiful lips slightly parted, and there are an infinite number of things that Zayn would like to do to him right now, but he can’t fucking move his hands… and his cock is about to explode…. 

He can feel the familiar heat in his groin—he’s not gonna be able to stop the inevitable humiliation from happening. Liam pumps frantically now and comes first, with an almost obscene moan, all over his own hand. Zayn follows immediately, and he can feel the hot mess accumulating in his boxers. His knees buckle and he might have fallen down if he wasn’t pinned against the locker by a heavily panting Liam.

They stay like that for a minute, but then Liam stands up, fixes his clothes and wipes his hand on the leg of Zayn’s trousers. 

“That should give you something to think about,” he spits. ”And by the way, I’d take a voluptuous blonde over your scrawny ass anytime.” With that he turns and walks out.

Zayn slides to the floor, trying unsuccessfully to piece together what just happened. It wasn’t an assault, exactly, because he’s been wanting sex with Liam since the day they met, but his head is spinning, and he does the only thing he can think of. He digs in his back pocket for his phone and sends a message. 

Louis, can you meet me for a drink, please !!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the support :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took a bit longer hope you like it :)

Louis 

“You said what? And he did what??” Louis is incredulous. 

When he received Zayn’s text, he was alarmed. He didn’t hesitate, making up an excuse for Nick, because telling him the truth would have been… unwise. He was always suspicious of Louis and Zayn’s relationship, and the concept of ‘best friends’ totally eludes him.

So now, as Louis listens to the full report of events, he can’t believe what he’s hearing. Looking at Zayn, who is sitting next to him with a bruise right down the side of his neck and suspicious white stains all over his jeans, he’s shaking his head. Liam surely did a thorough job—nothing short of a turtleneck jumper will conceal that mark of his non-affection. 

“You could have been bloody hurt,” Louis shouts. “He could have hit you, he could have… Could have—you know—done terrible things to you, and you just go and tell him he turns you on? Oh my god, Zayn, the guy is a maniac. I definitely have to terminate his membership, this time.” Louis grabs Zayn by the arm and even shakes him a little. 

“No, please,” Zayn pleads, “It wasn’t like that, I think he might have some problems.”

“Problems?! I have problems Zayn, but do I slam you into a locker and force you to watch me wank? No, I don’t!" Louis is screeching by now and quite a few of the pub regulars are giving them curious looks. 

“Calm down, Louis.” Zayn flashes the onlookers a sheepish grin and squeezes Louis’ thigh. “Nothing actually happened, and I didn’t exactly say no at any point. I’ve seen a few glimpses of another Liam, you know,” Zayn’s voice is fading.

Louis lets out a heavy sigh. “It’s not your job to fix people, Zayn.” Louis hates to bring this up, but he can’t think of any other way to impress on Zayn how bad this all sounds and how worried he is about him. “You’re gonna get yourself into another mess like you did with that married bloke back in Bradford.”

Zayn’s face turns a shade paler. “I didn’t know he was married, did I, or that he was straight,” he mumbles.

“He was taking advantage of you, using you to experiment with his sexuality.” Louis runs his fingers through Zayn’s hair.

“Liam is different… He’s a bit confused.” Zayn’s shoulders are hunched, and he refuses to look at Louis. 

"He is humiliating and degrading you on purpose, babe, that's pretty inexcusable," Louis says, voice urgent.

He fleetingly thinks that his own situation isn't all that different, but this is about Zayn, and he needs to focus on snapping him out of his current mood. 

Zayn has his eyes closed as he whispers, "There is something about him, though."

"Yeah, bulging biceps, a chiseled torso and presumably a big cock, am I right?" Louis snorts before elbowing Zayn in the ribs. They both descend into a fit of giggles. 

"I can see the appeal Zayn, really I can, but couldn't you just find yourself a nice guy for a change?" Louis asks.

"One like Harry, you mean?” Zayn challenges. 

Louis holds his breath. This is the topic he really wanted to avoid. 

"I don't want to talk about Harry," he says with a hint of petulance.

"Oh, I've noticed, and it seems you don't wanna talk to him either. The poor guy thinks you're avoiding him." 

Louis squirms in his seat. "I'm not avoiding him, we just didn't have the opportunity to have a chat yet."

"That's bullshit, Tommo, and you know it. He needs some advice about his classes, you're less than helpful and that’s not like you, so what’s going on?” Zayn demands to know.

Louis is searching around for an answer. “Nothing is going on. I just… don’t need that kind of complication right now. And you can wipe that smirk off your face, Malik.”

Why can’t Zayn just drop the subject? Louis is aware that he has been shirking his responsibilities as Harry’s employer, and he feels right awful about it, but the guy is a danger to his carefully orchestrated life. And of course Zayn isn’t dropping anything.

“So you like him,” he keeps digging.

“Of course I like him; everyone likes him.” Louis is seriously flustered. “Why wouldn’t I like him… He’s funny and gorgeous and helpful and charming—did I mention bloody gorgeous?—and I can’t be around him too much, Zayn, because I don’t trust myself with him, and that could be a bit of a problem. And anyway, you just want to distract me from your own fucked up obsession with that deranged muscleman. So if it’s all the same to you, can we not talk about Harry?” 

“Christ, Lou, I was just asking.” Zayn looks at him open mouthed and strokes Louis' back helplessly. 

Louis has no idea where this outburst just came from, but he is sure that he doesn’t want to delve into it any deeper, so he pulls himself together and plants a kiss on Zayn’s forehead.

“Ok, Zaynie, this is the plan. You will not ever be on your own in the building with him again. If you’re on the late shift, you will lock the door immediately after the last person that is not Liam. In return, I will give him another chance, and… I will talk to Harry.” 

“Ok, boss, fair enough,” Zayn smiles.

Louis is acutely aware that he’s been out for much longer than he had planned, and he dreads checking his phone. 

Nick Missed Call (8) it displays. 

.....

Shit, he is going to be angry, and now Louis will have to come up with something special in the bedroom to appease him. It's a good thing Nick doesn’t know that when they’re together, in bed or otherwise, all Louis thinks about are luscious curls and a smile made out of pure sunshine.

 

Louis is a man of his word. He is standing at the entrance to the dance studio to see how Harry is getting on prior to that talk they need to have. Watching Harry is something he could happily do all day, every day. The Black Eyed Peas are pounding from the powerful stereo system and Harry is jumping around with his hair in a tight bun: half madman, half ballerina. Well, at least he looks the part of fitness instructor in matching Adidas top and shorts. 

His clients do seem to enjoy themselves. Louis has spoken to a few of them, and the general opinion seems to be that Harry is very enthusiastic and a lot of fun, but that Zumba may not be his field of expertise. 

"He's doing alright, isn't he?" Niall appears next to him. 

“I’m no expert, Niall, but even I can see that he doesn’t know what he’s doing. He isn’t even a sport student is he?” 

Niall looks uncomfortable. “To be fair, I never said he was.” 

“I just assumed when you said that he is your mate from uni… Oh, never mind. What are we gonna do with the poor idiot?” Louis asks.

“Please don’t fire him, he really does need the money.”

Louis sighs. “Tell him to come and see me. And no, I’m not gonna fire him. I think Katie who does the spin classes used to do some dance. Maybe she can help him out.”

Niall looks relieved and grins. “I’ll let him know, thanks, Louis.”

Louis walks away with a rueful smile. As he tries to prepare himself for his chat with Harry, he thinks back to yesterday’s argument with Nick.

“Don’t think I don’t know that you met up with him, Louis.” Nick was stood in the kitchen sulking.

“He needed me, Nick, needed to talk.” Louis realised at that point that he needs to come up with better excuses in the future.

Nick went over to him and put his arm around his shoulders. “You could have talked at work. If you say there is nothing going on, then I believe you. I can trust you, can't I? You can’t blame me for wanting you all to myself. I really don't mind helping you out financially, but you got to give a bit in return…."

Louis felt suffocated, like he always does when Nick delivers one of his jealous lectures.

But now, Louis just smirks at the irony of it all. While Nick is worrying about him and Zayn, the real threat to their relationship is currently standing by the door to Louis’ office, looking rather nervous, albeit as lovely as ever.

“Harry, come in.” Louis can’t believe just how good Harry looks. He is sweaty and slightly out of breath, with his shirt sticking to his body and his hair in a glorious mess, making it difficult for Louis to stay focused.

Harry is still standing near the door, seemingly poised to flee, and before Louis has a chance to say anything else he blurts out, “I know what you’re gonna say, and I want you to know that I understand. I'm gonna get my stuff and leave right now. I should never have taken this job, but I wanted to get to know you so badly that I just didn’t think. I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you.”

Louis is stunned into silence. All he really got from that is that Harry wanted to meet him, and the knowledge makes him both very happy and very panicky.

“Right, ok, listen, Harry….” he fumbles for something useful to say. “It’s gonna be fine, yeah? You are quite popular with the clients, and nobody has actually complained. I think you just need a bit of support. Katie has some experience with dance, so I’ll ask her to speak to you.” Louis hopes he sounds reassuring, because he really can’t stand to see Harry upset.

His approach must have worked seeing as Harry’s entire face lights up, and he rushes around the desk to hug Louis. “Thank you,” he breathes warmly, just above Louis’ ear. 

Louis is trying—quite ardently, in fact—to convince himself that this one moment is all he wants with Harry, as he melts into the embrace, but his hammering heart suggests otherwise.

Far too soon Harry lets go of him and announces with a giddy grin, “I’m gonna hit the shower.” 

That right there is another piece of information that doesn’t help Louis to focus. He clears his throat, ushering Harry out of his office. “Come on then, we’ll see if Katie is around.

“Zayn, have you seen….,” Louis stops himself when he sees four pairs of eyes looking from him to Harry and back again. Zayn, Niall, Sophia and Josh are gathered at the reception area, apparently waiting for something. Nosey buggers.

“It’s all good. I can stay,” Harry beams, giving a thumbs up, “and to celebrate, why don’t I invite you all on Friday to that new finger food place.” 

Everyone hugs Harry while Louis mentally checks Nick’s appointment schedule. He is fairly sure that he is away on Friday so he could chance it. 

“Who’s coming then?” Harry asks expectantly. 

“I can make it,” Louis says before he can change his mind. Harry rewards him with a dazzling smile. 

Josh is nodding enthusiastically,” That place sounds awesome, I could— Fucking ouch, Ni!”

“You’re going out with your mates, remember?” Niall interrupts while subtly kicking Josh in the shin.

“Oh, yeah,” Josh grumbles.

“Aww… What about the rest of you?” Harry pouts.

“I promised Ed that I’d help him with the stocktaking, sorry, mate,” Zayn says casually, and nobody questions it.

“I’m taking Sophia out for a meal.” Niall is grinning from ear to ear, and Sophia gives him a definite what the fuck look, but then she smiles sweetly. 

“Oh, yes, we are going to a really posh restaurant—five courses, I believe,” she says, looking equal parts sly and smug.

Louis recognises a conspiracy when he sees one. “Just me and you then, Harry,” he observes.

Harry doesn’t seem to be the least bit surprised (or terrifically disappointed). “Well, if you’re all sure. Let me know when you want me to be there, Louis.” With that he heads off to the showers. 

Everyone else suddenly seems to be very busy, and Louis gets the feeling that he’s just been duped into a one-on-one outing with Harry. He won’t call it a date, because that is absolutely not what it is. 

 

.....

He has changed his outfit five times now and finally settles on tight black jeggings, which show off his curvy figure, and a black t-shirt. It’s still far too early to leave. Not since his teenage years has Louis felt so many butterflies in his stomach, and he has to remind himself that it’s only a meet up with a friend, any other explanation is just not an option.

He arrives just before the agreed time, relieved to see that Harry is already there. Dressed in blue jeans and a black and white striped shirt, he looks radiant, and Louis’ nerves are jittering.  
The newly opened and already popular restaurant is busy and loud, people of all ages milling around between the brightly coloured tables and booths. It’s a far cry from where Louis normally dines, but he takes his seat across from Harry in a neon green booth without hesitation. 

“Wow, this is different. How does it work?” He smiles at Harry who seems to blend in perfectly. 

“It’s all finger food,” Harry explains. “You can ask for a knife and fork if you want, but people will think you’re weird. They also make heavenly milkshakes here.” Harry’s enthusiasm is infectious, and Louis starts to relax a little.

“Shame that none of the others could make it,” he says nonchalantly.

“Yeah, I was thinking that maybe they just wanted us to have some time together,” Harry keeps up the pretense that he knew nothing about it beforehand. 

“Do you think that Niall is seriously taking Sophia out?” Louis decides to let him get away with it. After all he couldn’t ask for a better way to spend his Friday evening.

“Oh, definitely. He was sweating about the cost of it all, but she wouldn’t budge on the venue,” Harry grins.

So there is at least some justice in this world, Louis thinks, amused. His phone vibrates for the umpteenth time and he decides to have a quick look.

 

Nick now  
Louis where the fuck are you !!! Answer your phone you're with that receptionist piece of shit aren't you enjoy cause I'm back tomorrow and.........

Nick Missed Call (7)

 

He switches his phone off.

When their food arrives, the sight of Louis’ delicious burger reminds him that he hasn't actually eaten anything since breakfast. Harry has opted for chicken wings in a rather gooey coating. 

Every time their knees touch under the table, Louis' heart lurches. It's probably accidental given the extent of Harry's legs, but it unsettles him nonetheless. 

“Harry, I was meaning to ask you, what do you actually do at uni?” Maybe a sensible topic will stop him from thinking about Harry's legs and his lips which are shiny and covered in sticky sauce. 

Harry looks up from his food. “I study catering. Planning and preparing meals makes me happy.” Harry’s eyes shine. “Do you cook, Louis?”

“I can do some simple stuff, but no, not really.” Louis hasn’t made anything in ages. “My boyfriend and I eat out a lot, and if we don’t we usually just get a take away.” Shit! Why did he have to mention Nick? 

Harry doesn't react right away, looking thoughtful as he considers his next words. “So nobody cooks for you? Like when you’ve had a bad day or want to celebrate? Never?”

“It’s only food, Harry, no big deal.” Louis feels a little stab in his chest. He has never thought about this before, but Harry makes it sound as if there is a vital thing missing from his life.

Harry seems to process this, and then he says, “One of these days I will cook for you, but in the meantime, tell me something about yourself. Do you enjoy running the gym? It must be cool to own a place like that.” Louis is grateful to him for changing the subject.

“I guess Niall has told you that I’ve inherited it? The good part is that I made great friends there, but I really wanted to be an English teacher,” Louis says wistfully.

“You would have made a brilliant teacher, Louis. I know you love poetry and classic literature, but to pass your passion on to others would be amazing. You should follow that dream.” Harry covers Louis’ hand with his and squeezes lightly.

“It’s not that easy.” Louis reluctantly pulls his hand away. “People rely on me for their jobs.” 

“Sometimes you have to be a little selfish,” Harry proceeds to lick some of the sauce off his fingers, and Louis realises that those tight jeggings might not have been such a good idea after all. 

Thankfully, Harry seems to be unaware and goes right on speaking. “I tell you what, we should cheer ourselves up and order dessert.”

They end up deciding to order what seems to be an obscene amount of milkshakes and ice creams. Harry shares the most embarrassing moments of his varied working life so far, and Louis knows he hasn’t laughed so much in a long time. The hours fly by, and suddenly it’s time to pay and call it a night. 

“Can I give you a lift?” They are walking towards Louis' blue Peugeot. He doesn’t want to say goodbye yet, and he figures that offering to take Harry home is not too obvious.

“Yeah, why not.” Harry’s face is slightly flushed as he turns to Louis. “Thank you for this evening, I had the best time," he smiles. 

“You’re welcome… But next time you could just ask me out," Louis smirks.

Harry’s blush turns a shade darker. “And would you say yes? I like you, erm, a lot,” he stops walking and looks at Louis, “but I get very confusing messages from you.”

“Harry,” is all that Louis can manage before he closes the space between them. His hands wander under Harry’s shirt, fingertips skimming over the soft skin of his stomach. Harry lets out a low moan, then he cups Louis’ face and kisses him slowly and deliberately. He tastes like strawberry milkshake, and as his tongue is exploring Louis’ mouth, he runs his hands up and down Louis’ thighs. 

In the dim light of the carpark, Louis’ entire body feels like it’s on fire. He fists one hand into Harry’s curls and grabs his ass with the other. Harry's fingers find their way to Louis' crotch, just ghosting over his bulge. The desire in his eyes is unmissable. 

“Come home with me, Louis,” he whispers. 

“Uh,” Louis chokes out, his mind racing. He’s never wanted to say yes more than he wants to now, but snippets of conversations are popping up in his head.

"...just want what's best for you…”, “can trust you can't I…”, “don't mind helping you out financially…”, “back tomorrow..." 

He abruptly moves away from Harry. “I can’t— I can’t do this. I’m not that guy, not a cheater.” Louis grabs his own hair in frustration; seeing Harry’s look of utter disbelief makes him want to take it all back.

Remaining silent, Harry examines the cobblestones on the footpath as if they are the most interesting thing he’s ever seen.

Louis is desperate for some kind of confirmation that he’s doing the right thing. “Say something, please, Harry… Anything...,” he pleads.

“Do you love him?” Harry’s voice is barely audible. His hands are in his pockets, his shoulders slumped.

“There are other things more important than stupid love. He’s not a bad guy, he helps me out, without him the gym would go under. I can’t let that happen; I have responsibilities, dammit.” Louis is rapidly talking himself into a rage. He’s aware how shitty his whole speech sounds, but Harry just doesn’t seem to understand.

“So you allow yourself to feel like crap all the time because some prick gives you money? There’s a term for that, Louis,” Harry’s tone is measured and calm, but he might as well have punched him.

The blood drains from Louis’ face. He feels sick, and his eyes are welling up.

With the last bit of composure he has left he retorts, “Well, now that we have that cleared up, you can go back to your carefree fantasy world of love and good fun. Let me just give you one piece of free advice, Harry: Life is not a romantic novel, and the sooner you accept that the better.”

Harry’s expression is like stone as he turns on his heels. “Yeah, thanks for the offer of a lift. I think I’ll walk.”

Louis forces himself not to watch him leave and gets into his car. Tears blur his vision, and he wonders how exactly this got so out of hand. What actually just happened?

He wipes his face and drives home to the large empty house he shares with Nick. He doesn’t want to sleep in the huge bed full of memories so he curls up on the sofa, fully dressed, because he can’t bring himself to take off the clothes that Harry touched. And when the tears return, he wishes that tomorrow would do him a favour and stay away for a while.

 

.


	5. Chapter 5

Zayn 

The atmosphere is gloomy as Zayn is writing out the order for the protein shakes and health bars Tomlinson’s Gym sells. It was another one of Nick’s ideas—offering expensive snacks to hungry gym goers—and as much as Zayn detests the guy, the decision to try it really has increased their revenue. Across the counter sits a despondent Harry, staring into space. He hasn’t said a word since he arrived, not even to return Zayn’s greeting. 

Harry looks bad off, but when Louis walks in, Zayn is even more shocked at his appearance. His eyes are bloodshot, his face pale with a deep frown. 

“Louis, are you—”

“Not now, Zayn,” he cuts him off. “I’ll be in my office.” He brushes past them without making eye contact, ignoring Harry completely.

Harry seems to shrink into himself, which makes Zayn suspicious.

“Do you know anything about this?” He pokes him with his pen. No answer. “Harry, what happened?” Zayn continues. His tone causes Harry to flinch.

“I fucked up,” he says eventually.

“Fucked up how exactly?” Zayn is determined to get an explanation, either from his boss or his coworker, but Harry is the easiest target at the moment. 

“We had a wonderful time at the restaurant… he looked so happy, honestly! Then I told him that I like him and that I wanted to spend the night with him, but he— He didn’t want to go behind his boyfriend’s back.” Harry’s voice is shaking with emotion.

“That definitely can’t be the whole story. You were upfront about what you wanted, and Louis would never hold that against you, so what are you not telling me?” 

Harry squirms and winces at something in his memory. “I didn’t mean it, you have to believe me,” he whines. 

“Talk,” Zayn demands, fixing him with a cold stare. 

“I sort of implied that staying with his boyfriend just for the money pretty much amounts to prostitution,” Harry says weakly.

Horrified, Zayn barely manages to resist the urge to slap him before he throws his pen onto the counter. He rushes to the office where he finds Louis slumped over his desk. 

“I thought I told you to leave me alone,” Louis snaps.

“Yeah, you did, but I’m just gonna ignore that.” Zayn makes a conscious effort to soften his tone before continuing. “He told me what he said to you,” he admits, perching on the corner of the desk.

Louis sighs. “Did he mention the part where I led him on? He had every right to think that I wanted to be with him, plus I said some things as well. He was angry and frustrated; I can’t blame him.”

“Still no excuse, though,” Zayn grumbles.

“I mean, why would he even want me anyway?” Louis carries on. “He thinks that he’s into me—and who knows, maybe he is right now—but he will get bored and move on. I don't think I could live through that,” Louis whispers. 

Zayn can’t stand to see his friend so dejected, putting all the blame on himself. 

“What happens now?”

Louis hesitates for a moment, then he squares his shoulders. “Now I’m gonna sort this mess. Nick came back last night. He said that he loves me, wants me to make more of an effort.”

Zayn raises his eyebrows.

“I have… have been refusing him lately, you know…,” Louis continues, “but I’m gonna make this relationship work, at least until all you guys are sorted. After all, we were good together once.”

Zayn can’t bring himself to tell Louis that he sounds ridiculous, that he’s making a big mistake. 

So he just opens his arms. “C’mere, Lou,” he says soothingly.

Louis jumps up and clings to Zayn as if he is drowning, burying his head in Zayn’s shoulder. “You think that I’m an idiot, don’t you?” he asks, words muffled by Zayn’s soft shirt. 

Zayn strokes his hair. “No, babe, you do what you have to do. I will always support you no matter what.” 

Louis tightens his squeeze around Zayn’s body. 

“So where does that leave you and Harry?” Zayn asks cautiously.

“It leaves us where we should have been all along. He works here, and I stay out of his way.” Louis sounds adamant, leaving no room for debate.

“Ok, I’d better go and get some work done.” Zayn’s going to let Louis be for now, but his heart aches for his best friend. He kisses Louis on the head before returning, deep in thought, to the reception area—where he trips over Niall’s bag.

“How many times do I have to tell you not to leave your crap lying around?” he chides.

“Whoa, aren’t we all in a pissy mood.” Niall removes the offending item. “Harry here is virtually mute and you’re on the warpath as well. I take it our plan backfired?”

“Just a bit,” Harry groans from behind his hands. 

“If it’s any consolation, my evening wasn’t a resounding success either,” Niall supplies. “In fact, I’m so done with women.” As an afterthought he adds, “Hey, you two handsome lads are available, aren’t you?”

“Piss off, Niall,” Harry and Zayn huff in unison. 

“Ok, ok I get it, I’m not your type.” He actually looks a little affronted. 

“You gonna tell us what happened with Sophia or not?” Harry taps his fingers on the countertop.

Zayn can’t make up his mind whether or not to speak to Harry about Louis at some point but decides to distract himself with Niall’s troubles for now. 

“The meal was awesome—kinda expensive, but hey. I complimented her on her looks, told her what an amazing trainer she is. We got on like a house on fire, let me tell ya. I was the perfect gentleman. She laughed at all of my jokes, even held my hand.” So far, the news is all good, so Zayn isn’t sure why Niall’s face looks thunderous instead of bright with joy. “Guess what she said when I dropped her outside her house? Her exact words were, ‘I’m glad that you are my friend.’ FRIEND!! Fucking marvellous.” Niall shakes his head in a hopeless gesture.

And it really is a bit depressing: Zayn thinks about how the gym used to be his happy place, and how they’re all now pining for someone they can’t have. It makes him sad.

A female voice cuts into his thoughts. “Hello, earth to Zayn, are you there?”

Suddenly Sophia is standing next to Niall (who is doing his best to appear cool). Harry raises his hand for a casual wave prior to returning to his state of depression.

“Sorry, Soph, didn’t see you there, what’s up?”

She tucks her hair behind her ear. “Just want to let you know that Liam Payne booked some individual training sessions with me. That’s ok, right?”

Zayn can feel the blood rushing to his face. Damn, how can the mere mention of Liam’s name do that to him? 

“Yeah, fine, no need to tell me,” he says, looking down at his shoes.

Niall, on the other hand, objects. “No, absolutely not,” he barks, and stands abruptly.

“Excuse me?” Sophia seems perplexed.

“No way are you training him one to one.”

“I fail to see how that is any of your business,” she says, eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“I make it my business. Liam Payne is a tosser.” Niall raises his voice, touching her bare arm.

While Zayn wishes he could defend Liam—explain to them that he is not like that, not even remotely a shady character—there is no real evidence for it. Most likely it’s all in his head, him dreaming up a picture of Liam that’s nowhere near the truth because he just happens to have the hots for him. Oh, whatever, he thinks, and decides not to contribute to the conversation.

Sophia swipes Niall’s fingers away, dashing even more of his hopes. “If I refused to work with everyone around here who’s a tosser, I wouldn’t have a job. Grow up, Niall.” Argument over with, she slings her bag on her shoulder, not awarding Niall another glance as she exits the room.

“What the hell kind of macho performance was that?” Harry lifts his head off his forearm.

Niall’s face falls. “No idea, I just don’t want that creep hanging around her.”

Zayn needs to stop this conversation, so he makes a spur of the moment decision.

“Lads, why don’t we go clubbing on Grey Street tomorrow night, maybe. Since we’re all single it might be fun.”

The others are looking at him as if he had just told them that he is running for Prime Minister. Zayn never suggests a night out, except these are desperate times.

Niall nods. “Alright, why not? I could do with a drink or twelve. You’re up for it, Haz?”

Harry grunts something unintelligible, face rested on his arms again, but it sounds as if he’s joining them. 

“Great!” Zayn pretends to be more enthusiastic than he feels. At least it might take his mind off Liam—the fact that he hasn’t seen him in a while, that is. (And the fact that this bothers him a lot). 

.....

 

The more Zayn thinks about the evening ahead of him, the more he doubts that this is a good idea. Three down in the dumps lads out on the town… What can possibly go wrong? Never mind, it’s too late anyway, Harry and Niall are meeting him outside the club in half an hour. A quick glance in the mirror shows him that he could probably do with a hair cut. As it is, he keeps his hair out of his face with a headband. The first item on the clean washing pile is a soft, white jumper. That will go fine with his black jeans. Shuri is not impressed that he is going out.

“I won’t be long, my lovely,” he reaches to placate her with a good stroking, but she is already sulking under the coffee table. On his way out, he runs into Ed.

“Going anywhere nice?”

“Just a couple of drinks with Nialler and Haz, you wanna tag along?” 

“Sorry, I’ve promised a mate that we’ll do a jamming session. Give me a little more notice next time and I’m in.”

“Will do.” Zayn considers yet again how lucky he is that Ed is his landlord. He’s a great guy, quite a talented musician. Louis and Zayn keep telling him that he should pursue it more seriously, but he seems to be happy with his shop and the odd open mic night at the local pub. 

“Catch you later, then,” he says, smilingly, before he pats Zayn on the shoulder and disappears into his store room.

Newcastle town centre is buzzing like it does every Saturday night. Droves of revellers roam the streets, already in varying states of intoxication by the time Zayn arrives, just after 10 p.m. The lads are waiting outside the club under a streetlight, so he has a chance to take in their appearance as he approaches at a leisurely pace. 

Niall hasn’t made much of an effort with a pair of jeans and a crumpled grey t-shirt. Harry on the other hand might as well be auditioning for a modelling job. His black leather trousers fit tightly where they touch, while his ivory silk shirt is flowing loosely over his torso, unbuttoned halfway down. Shit, they’re going to have to keep an eye on him. Zayn fleetingly wonders at which point he became the mother hen among his friends, but he finds he doesn’t really mind.

Inside they locate a small, empty table in the corner. Just as soon as they are seated, both Zayn and Niall spot a not-so-friendly face: Liam. 

“Great, just the person I wanted to see. I’m gonna make sure he stays the fuck away from Sophia,” Niall says hotly.

“Sit down, he doesn’t know we’re here. I want to keep it that way.” Zayn shoves him onto a chair and goes to get the drinks. While he waits at the bar, he observes Liam’s table. No one in the group looks familiar except for Liam—dressed all in black, his right hand bandaged. Another day another fight, what a prick. 

A girl that is not Ellie hangs on his neck, her hands all over him. Zayn has an uncomfortable feeling in his chest, which he refuses to recognise, because if he did, he would have to acknowledge that he is jealous. He buys a tray full of drinks so he doesn’t have to return to the bar too soon. Luckily, he makes it back to the table without being seen by Liam. Harry claims one of beers and drains it the very moment Zayn puts them down. 

“Steady on, Styles, remember that you’re a lightweight,” Niall scoffs. 

“I want to get hammered.” Harry starts on his second beer straight away. “I want to drink and dance and forget that the guy that I want so badly doesn’t want me back.”

“That’s not true,” Zayn sighs.

“It is, he made that abundantly clear.” Harry gulps down his drink as he gets up, vanishing into the sea of dancers. Niall is staring morosely into his Guinness which he hasn’t touched. 

“So what’s your next move with Soph going to be?” Zayn asks while simultaneously trying to locate Harry in the crowd and watching Liam sucking on that girl on his lap.

“I’m still in the process of organising her party, being the good friend that I am,” Niall sounds bitter, emphasising the word ‘friend’ with finger quotes. “In the meantime, I’m gonna grow up like she wants me to. I’ve enrolled in a business add on at uni, can you believe that? Oh, and you caught that bit about Pete?” he adds miserably. “She’s going on a date with that health inspector dude—tonight, as it happens. What does he have that I haven’t?” 

Niall carries on comparing himself to that guy, but it’s all a bit lost on Zayn. He is fascinated by Liam’s lips moving over the girl’s throat. The scene in the changing rooms springs to mind, and he suddenly feels very hot.

“So anyway, it’s all gone to shit,” Niall concludes. He doesn’t seem to have noticed Zayn’s mental absence. In the next moment, Harry returns from the dance floor, thereby relieving Zayn of the need to make up an excuse as to why he wasn’t listening to Niall. 

He is a hot mess, his hair a wild mane, his shirt all but unbuttoned. He clearly has had too much to drink already; nevertheless, he chugs a colourful cocktail anyway. 

“James bought it for me,” he slurs as an answer to Zayn’s questioning look.

“Who the hell is James?” Niall is also confused, but Harry has already disappeared back into the masses.

Zayn takes a sip of his beer, looking over to where Liam is now obviously arguing with his snogging partner. She keeps grabbing him around the waist; he keeps pushing her away. He is unsteady on his feet when he turns to leave. Zayn thinks he can see a set of keys in his hand. Surely he isn’t going to drive? Oh, god.

“Nialler, please look out for Harry, I just—have to do something.”

“Yeah, fine,” Niall smiles absentmindedly.

Zayn just catches Liam slipping out of the side entrance, but it takes him a while to push his way across the packed venue. Dammit, Liam, he curses silently, why do you have to be such a tit? Luckily, he is somewhat slower than normal due to the alcohol. Zayn reaches him just as he is fumbling to open the door to a gorgeous, very expensive-looking, white sports car. The idiot is actually going to drive when he can’t even stand properly. 

“Payno…,” Zayn barks. 

Liam turns around slowly, a condescending smirk appearing on his face.

“Malik,” he sneers, “you just can’t stay away from me, can you?”

That is dangerously close to the truth, so Zayn ignores it. He goes for the friendly approach for now.

“Liam, mate, you’re drunk, you can’t drive.”

“You keep saying that to me… Is that some kind of chat up line of yours?” he giggles.

For god’s sake, stop giggling. Why is he doing that? It’s cute and disturbs Zayn to no end. 

Liam looks him up and down, then reaches out to trace the outline of the fading bruises that he left Zayn with when they last met.

“Why do you even care about me driving?” He draws his hand back in what seems like slow motion, slouching against his car. 

“I don’t, I care about the other people on the road.”

Liam’s face clouds over for a split second, then the familiar cocky expression returns.

“I knew that,” he says. “Wanna know how I knew?” He doesn’t wait for an answer. “Because nobody cares about me, Malik, nobody.”

“I’m sure you’ve got that wrong. Your mum…,” Zayn starts but gets interrupted by a now angry-looking Liam.

“Don’t talk about my mum,” he emphasises every word and glares at Zayn before continuing. “You don’t ever get to talk about her.”

“Alright, calm down,” Zayn takes a step back, raising his hands.

“You’re scared of me,” Liam sounds almost proud of himself. “You—you think I’m gonna punch you in your pretty face.”

Zayn glances pointedly at Liam’s bandaged hand. Hey, it’s not that far fetched, is it? But wait…. Did he say pretty face? Come on, Zayn, focus.

“Give me your keys,” he demands, holding out his hand. Liam seems to consider it, then changes the subject in an apparent non sequitur.

“You see this car, Malik? I love this car,” he gently strokes the roof of his prized possession—tenderly, as though the surface under his hand is the warm skin of a lover instead of a cold sheet of metal. “That bird I was with in there, she wanted me to fuck her in here. She was actually serious,” he snorts. “I tell you, no dirty bitch is getting near my beauty.”

And that is just too much unwanted information for Zayn. Why do drunks always have to spout so much drivel?

While Liam rambles on, Zayn turns a bit to the side and calls for a taxi. Now if he could only get to those keys.

“Liam, please give me the keys,” he urges, sliding his phone back into his pocket and carefully approaching Liam, no sudden moves. 

“No,” Liam retorts, his tone petulant. “I’m going now.”

“You’re not getting behind that wheel.” Zayn grabs Liam’s wrist.

Liam grins like getting Zayn’s hands on him was the point all along. “Oh no? And what are you gonna do about it?”

This is a good question. Zayn needs him to let go of the keys. Drastic measures are called for, so he moves his free hand under Liam’s shirt, keeping the fingers of his other hand wrapped tightly like a shackle on Liam’s wrist. Good thing Louis can’t see him right now—after all, he gave his word not to be alone with Liam. Louis said in the gym building, though, so technically he is not breaking his promise. That’s his justification, anyway. 

Liam is momentarily startled. “What are you doing?” he groans.

Instead of an answer, Zayn runs his fingers down Liam’s chest. His skin is so warm, so soft. Zayn almost forgets the point of this exercise.

“You have to get the fuck out of my head,” Liam murmurs. He tries to kiss Zayn but misses and ends up slobbering all over his cheek. 

“I wasn’t aware that I was in it.”

“Your kind do that, you know, mess with people’s heads,” Liam breathes hotly into Zayn’s ear.

Your kind? Really?

Despite the crap that Liam comes out with, Zayn finds himself leaning into his touch. He looks and smells so good. If only this was for real. Why does he have to be such an ass?

“The keys,” he croaks into Liam’s chest.

“Make me.”

Ok, then. Zayn seeks out Liam’s bulge between them, squeezing Liam’s erection through the material of his jeans. A low growl escapes Liam’s lips, and his baggy trousers are his downfall. Zayn’s hand slides in easily, his fingers brushing over a rock hard dick. Liam’s head rolls backwards as he bucks into Zayn’s hand. 

The sound of keys hitting the pavement coincides with the arrival of the taxi. Result.

Zayn yanks himself away and snatches them off the floor triumphantly. “Your transport is here.”

“You absolute twat.” Liam spits out the words, but he stumbles into the back seat of the taxi without further protest.

Zayn feels quite smug even though he is sporting a raging boner. He tells the driver the address. All those times studying Liam’s membership details at work have finally paid off. 

“You’re nothing but a fucking slut, Malik.” Liam delivers his parting shot as he fumbles to shut the door of the cab without catching any essential part of his body or clothing in it. 

Zayn pays the driver and leaves without another word, needing to get away from that infuriating wanker who hurts him time and again.

 

When he gets back to the table, he finds Niall in pretty much the same position that he left him in, but Harry has returned and is sitting on a much older guy’s lap, engaged in some heavy petting. 

“You were supposed to look after him.”

Niall shrugs. “He’s right here, all in one piece.”

Oh for fuck's sake, this evening is getting worse by the minute. 

“Come on, we’re going.” He tries to pull Harry off the guy, but he’s both totally plastered and unwilling to let go. 

“This is James,” he chirps, “and he thinks I’m pretty.”

“Yeah, I bet he does,” Zayn agrees sarcastically.

“But, Zayn, he’s my friend.”

“He’s not your friend, love, he wants to shag you… Now come on.” Zayn ignores Harry’s pouty face in favour of giving James a cold look.

“And you are?” James squares up to him.

Niall steps in with, “He’s his boyfriend, now fuck off.”

“Oh, so now you remember your responsibilities,” Zayn remarks, staggering a bit under Harry’s weight. 

James looks like he wants to say something, but then gets up to leave with a last lecherous look at Harry. Zayn has had enough; he just wants to go home. 

“Come on, you useless leprechaun, help me get this one home.”

“He lives in the next block to mine, I’ll get him there. Zayn, I’m sorry, I was too wrapped up in my own stuff.” Niall apologises, finally putting one of Harry’s arms around his neck to share the burden.

“No harm done, I guess.” For the second time tonight Zayn gets in touch with the taxi company. He makes sure the other two lads get away safely, then sinks with a sigh of relief into the seat of his own taxi.

He watches the scenery fly by and thinks that Louis might not be all that wrong—he needs to sort his own mess before trying to help others sort theirs. His involvement with Liam is destroying him. How many more times does he need to be humiliated before he takes action? 

No more Liam: that’s the only option that makes sense. Maybe he will look for an actual date and also apply for a few jobs, something he hasn’t done in a long time. At 22, he should be aiming to get his life on track. 

His decision is made, and Liam Payne can fuck right off with his drunken groping and sexy car. Zayn needs him about as much as he needs another pathetically depressed friend, which is to say not at all! And if his heart doesn’t happen to agree with his head, well, too bad. He’s used to ignoring that particular organ, after all.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Recent events have thrown me big time but here is finally the next part.

Louis

It’s been three weeks since the failed dinner date. Trying not to think about Harry, and only talking to him when strictly necessary, has been hard on Louis. His thoughts are going in constant circles: Has he made the right decision? Is he being stupid? Does doing ‘the right thing’ even matter in this day and age? 

It matters to Louis. Now if he could only figure out what the right thing to do is…. 

Today is Harry’s performance review at the gym, which he could do without. It crossed his mind that Niall is qualified to take it on, but he is Harry’s mate and therefore biased. Anyway, Louis is running this place, in spite of what Nick or anyone else may think. 

Perching on his desk, swinging his legs like an impatient child, he checks the time: just a few hours to go before their meeting. The strap of his new watch digs into his wrist. Nick gave it to him at the weekend, and Louis can’t shake the feeling that it represents some kind of reward for good behaviour. It also serves as a reminder that Nick didn’t put much thought into the present—Louis doesn’t care much at all for watches. 

Up through last night, he’s fallen back into his familiar pattern of keeping the peace, being available to his partner in whatever capacity Nick wants. It’s only until the gym doesn’t need a benefactor anymore, is what he tells himself. Maybe mentioning Sophia’s party over dinner was a mistake. Louis winces a little at the memory.

“Do you have to go?” Nick asked with a sour expression. “Surely if everyone else is there, that should be enough?”

“Yes, I do.” Louis sensed they were on the cusp of yet another pointless argument and tried to end it before it started. “It would be very rude not to go. Niall is putting a lot of time and effort into organising it.”

“This has nothing to do with your number one fan being there, then?” Nick’s voice was deceptively casual as he chased a piece of broccoli around his plate with his fork.

It was hard for Louis to believe this topic had reared its ugly head yet again. “Zayn? Yes, he will be there. Can you stop going on about this, please?”

Nick put his cutlery down, expression becoming closed and calculating. “Not until you tell me how far things have really gone between you.”

“Nothing happened at all recently, Nick,” Louis spat. “Like I keep telling you, we kissed a few times before you came along, and that was it.”

Nick shoved his plate away, gesturing absentmindedly for Louis to take it. “He is an attractive guy with a degree, why on earth would he be hanging around that poxy gym of yours if not to get into your pants?”

Louis got up from the table to clear it, letting out an exasperated sigh. “He’s my friend, Nick, not that you would understand the concept. I trust him with my life, and to be honest, there is nothing you can say or do to change that.”

“You’re quite cute when you’re feisty, just don’t forget that your ass belongs to me,” Nick said, leering, and he punctuated the statement with a quick and rather painful squeeze of Louis’ bum as he was walking away with their dishes. “By the way, I will stop by the gym soon to have a look at the books.” Nick’s flippant tone didn’t tie in with the malicious glance he gave Louis.

After yet another look at his irritatingly uncomfortable watch Louis arrives at reception where Sophia and Jessica are deep into a giggly chat, while Niall appears to be filling in a stack of achievement records. He may or may not also be eavesdropping.

“You just missed our very own homophobe,” Niall says, deadpan, looking up from his papers.

Louis’ confusion must show on his face, because Niall elaborates.

“Mr. Payne. His training just finished. What a weirdo… Remember when he picked up his car keys which he apparently forgot in his locker? You would think he’d notice them gone when he can’t drive away, but what do I know, maybe assholes don’t need keys.”

“Can you lay off him?” Sophia interrupts her conversation with a scowl. “Just give it a rest.”

Niall shrugs and returns to his work. It’s times like these Louis thinks that the swimming instructor is his own worst enemy when it comes to his flop of a love life.

“How are his training sessions coming along, Soph?” Louis asks diplomatically.

“Fine, actually. He doesn’t say much, but he works very hard and never misses an appointment. I quite like working with him; he’s a natural athlete.”

“He sure spends a lot of time here,” Louis muses. “I’m glad to hear he’s not causing any more trouble.” 

“Come on, Sophia, spill the beans, what is Pete like?” Jessica reminds her friend that there was some gossip to be imparted before Niall changed the topic.

“Jess, there’s nothing much to tell. He is a really nice guy, and we go on the occasional date.” Sophia gives a little shrug, but then she drops her gaze coyly. “Although… He’s invited me for dinner at his house tomorrow night.”

“So is it serious?” Jess can’t hide her excitement.

“Not at the moment, but we’ll see, perhaps I will have something more to report after tomorrow.” 

Upon seeing Sophia’s dreamy smile, Niall suddenly looks like he’s having some form of existential crisis. He clutches his documents to his chest and turns to Louis. “Can I talk to you, boss? Walk with me to my car?”

“Alright, mate,” Louis nods.

“Why do I say these things around her?” Niall hisses as soon as they are out of earshot.

“I was wondering the same thing, but I’m not qualified to give anybody relationship advice,” Louis concedes. “Anyway, was that what you wanted to talk to me about?”

“Naw, it’s about the party. I’d like all of the staff to come along even if it means the gym would have to close for one evening. Is that possible… Please?” Niall’s lopsided grin could melt the polar ice caps. Who can say no to that?

“That shouldn’t be a problem. One evening isn’t going put us out of business.” Louis pulls Niall into a quick hug. “How are the plans shaping up?”

Niall’s face brightens. “Jess helped me contact Sophia’s old friends from uni, and most of them are coming. Zayn designed the invitations plus he is going to assist Josh behind the bar. Harry does the catering, Katie is our DJ, and Jess and I are in charge of the decorations.”

“Sounds great, what do you want me to do?” Louis asks.

“Nothing, just bring yourself and enjoy. If necessary, you can function as our bouncer,” Niall grins as he gets into his car. “Guess what, I just decided, I’m gonna invite Pete.”

“Pete, as in Sophia’s Pete?” Louis looks at Niall in surprise.

“Yeah, she obviously likes him and he seems to be an ok guy. It’s her party, after all.”

“Wow, that’s a big gesture. Does that mean you’re gonna accept defeat?” Louis is quite astonished by this turn of events.

Niall starts the engine with a shrug. “Who knows, I can’t force her to like me, can I? What about you and Harry… Are you talking again yet?”

“Not really, but it’s his review today, so I have no choice. I’ll catch you later, mate.” Louis shuts the driver’s side door before Niall can ask any more awkward questions, slapping the roof of the car a few times in a friendly send off. 

On his way back into the building he steels himself for the upcoming meeting with Harry. His heartrate is rapidly increasing at the thought, as well as his anxiety level. A tiny part of what Louis’ feeling might be excitement, but he’ll never admit to it. Nope.

.....

The knock on the door comes precisely on time, followed immediately by Harry strolling into the office with an air of defiance. 

“Sit down,” Louis orders, gesturing towards the empty chair on the other side of his desk. Harry complies with an unidentifiable facial expression and casually starts playing with the box containing paper clips. Louis just needs this to be over, Harry’s hands are so distracting—long and slender like the rest of him. Ahem. 

“How have you settled in?” he asks after clearing his throat. 

“Great, I love it here. Everyone is so welcoming. Well, almost everyone….” Harry seems to draw out his words more than usual, his eyes locked on Louis’.

Ignoring that obvious dig, Louis carries on, barely maintaining his professionalism. “I’ve had a chat with Katie, and she thinks that you’re progressing well. She should continue to mentor you.”

“Ok, yes, that works… She’s been very helpful,” Harry still hasn’t broken eye contact.

Louis attempts to keep his mind blank.

“Is there anything else you need from me?” he asks, struggling to hold Harry’s stare. As the authority figure here, he doesn’t want to be the first to back down.

“As a matter of fact there is, unfortunately you are not willing to give it,” Harry mocks, green eyes glinting.

Louis could kick himself for walking straight into that one. He pushes his chair back brusquely. “I’m pleased to hear that you enjoy working with us. If you have any problems, come and see me.”

What the hell is he saying? He sounds like a total douche, but he can’t stop himself, and the sooner Harry leaves the better.

As if he read his mind, Harry gets up slowly. With one hand on the door handle, he turns around. “Louis, I just—I need to say something. I’m sorry… about what I said. I wanted to let you know so many times, but you keep shutting me out.”

Louis is standing with his back to Harry. “S’ok, it was one of those things, we’ve both moved on since.”

“Have we?” Harry sounds slightly bitter. “I haven’t, and you don’t look like your life is a bundle of laughs either.”

Voice trembling, Louis answers, “I have sorted things out, and I’m content now. Please… Please leave me alone.”

“Content,” Harry counters, “that’s all you’ve got? If I believed for one minute that that’s the truth, I would back off.”

Louis can feel Harry coming nearer, and this is not what was supposed to happen. He stops just before their bodies touch.

“Please turn around and tell me that you don’t want me.”

Louis has to swallow around the lump in his throat. He tries to speak, but in the end he can only shake his head helplessly.

“What does that mean, Louis? Say it, it’s not that difficult.”

Why is he taunting him like this? Louis’ chest is tight; he wants to tell him to go to hell, but he was never a good liar. He can feel Harry’s breath on his neck, and it’s wonderful—the warmth and nearness. How can this be wrong, when every fibre of his body wants to agree with Harry, when only his stupid mind is putting obstacles in the way?

“What’s it going to be, Louis?” Harry puts one hand on Louis’ hip, turning him around. Their faces are inches apart, and Louis’ resolve crumbles.

“Yes, I want you, Harry, like I never wanted anyone in my life, but I’m fucking scared. I don’t know what to do.” Louis is rubbing his own upper arms to stop himself from falling apart. 

Eyes soft and full of desire, Harry runs his free hand through Louis’ hair.

“We’ll work something out,” he says, soothingly. “You don’t have to make any decisions or commit to anything, just let yourself be happy every once in a while.”

Harry’s gentle coaxing is hard to resist, and yes, maybe he’s right. Maybe Louis can have a small slice of happiness without too many repercussions.

Or perhaps that’s nothing but wishful thinking, but in any case, there is no further chance to consider the matter, because Harry’s tongue is licking deep into Louis’ mouth and lovingly fighting for space with his own. Once the shock of being unexpectedly snogged wanes, Louis dares to run his hands all over Harry’s body, exploring each and every place that he’s wanted to explore for so long. 

Louis automatically moves to untie the drawstring on Harry’s joggers (possibly by force of habit and Nick’s conditioning), but he removes Louis’ fingers and guides him gently to his chair instead. 

“Harry, what if someone…,” Louis can’t get his thoughts in order. His blood is rushing in his ears, body desperate to be touched again—and again and again—by those hands that are currently locking the door to the office.

Oh, shit. He is simply not ready for this, didn’t have time to process what he thinks might be going to happen. While his dick is absolutely up for this, his brain can’t follow. 

“What are you doing?” he asks, just to make sure.

“What I’m doing is saving you from the bother of having to face the world with that,” Harry has a dirty grin on his face, pointing to Louis’ very apparent hard-on. He pulls Louis’ shirt out and unbuttons it expertly, pausing only to ask, “You ok with this?”

“God, yeah,” Louis manages to breathe, unsure of why Harry is bothering to remove his shirt if he’s going to be blowing him. On the other hand, more naked skin leads to more touching of naked skin, and that’s never a bad thing.

Harry kneels between his legs, peppering little kisses up and down his bare torso until he reaches the waistband of his trousers. How is Louis ever again going to be able to get any meaningful work done sitting in this chair?

Harry carefully nips at Louis’ cock through the material with his teeth before pulling down the zip at an exceedingly slow pace.

“Please now,” Louis grabs Harry’s hair, tugging him closer and basically making him faceplant awkwardly in Louis’ crotch. If he wants to avoid major embarrassment, they can’t wait any longer; he’s not going to last. 

Thankfully, Harry gets the hint and proceeds to strip down Louis’ trousers and boxers in one go, far enough that he can feel the smooth leather of the chair under his arse and a bit of breeze on his dick. It doesn’t have a chance to get cold, though, as Harry’s mouth closes around it without a moment’s hesitation. And yeah, this is incredible. He actually has no problem taking the entire length in, and Louis’ head is all fuzzy after only a few satisfying strokes of Harry’s tongue up his shaft. Through the haze he thinks he can hear somebody trying to open the door, but it’s probably his imagination. 

It’s almost strange to have someone on his knees for him instead of the other way around, Louis thinks, realising it’s been depressingly long since the last time. What’s even better is the way Harry seems to genuinely enjoy servicing him, providing Louis with a bit of excitement and relaxation all at once, paradoxical as that may sound.

While Louis ponders this turn of events, Harry flicks his tongue nimbly around Louis’ dick, and then it only takes a few more bobs of Harry’s head to surprise Louis into coming fast and hard, unable to stop himself from moaning Harry’s name over and over. He can only hope the sound of his voice doesn’t travel beyond his office. (It most likely does, but hey—worth it.)

It takes him quite while to come down from that unbelievable high. Harry looks up at him licking the evidence off his lips.

“That was amazing.” Louis admires Harry’s ability to leave no trace of what just happened. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy, as they say. Or maybe ‘easy come, easy go’ would be more appropriate. Ugh, Louis’ mind is too lost in a pleasurable daze to make sense, even to him.

“What about you?” Once Louis is coherent enough, he focuses on Harry and strokes his cheek, feeling the man’s jawbone move as he beings to smile. “I really want to return the favour.”

“I’ll take care of it, this was all about you,” Harry says, grin in full effect. “Now get dressed or people might talk.”

To prevent any potential protest, Harry puts his lips to Louis’ before sauntering out of the office. 

Whilst Louis is hastily putting himself together, he waits for any guilty feelings to surface, but… they just don’t. He isn’t struck down by lightning; Nick doesn’t break down the office door; nothing happens. He takes that as a positive sign. 

But the universe decides not to let Louis go completely unscathed. Just outside in the corridor he runs into Zayn. 

“There you are, I need you to authorise these invoices.” Zayn shoves some documents and a biro towards Louis. “I came to see you earlier but your door was locked.”

“Erm… yes. It was, I mean… I had to… I just wanted… There was an important phone call. Gym business. You know, a sensitive matter.” Louis feels himself blush. Sensitive, indeed. He quickly signs the papers, hoping that Zayn will stop looking at him with that ‘I know what’s happening’ smirk of his. Predictably, his hope is in vain. 

“Also I saw Harry just a minute ago, he looked like the cat who got the cream.”

“Literally…,” Louis mutters under his breath.

“What?”

“Nothing.” A sudden coughing fit would probably be too obvious, so Louis settles for flicking his fringe back and using his fingers to tidy it up a bit. There we go, very casual.

Zayn, however, is not deterred. “Didn’t he have his review a little while ago? Like when I saw him? Right after your door was locked?” The mischief behind Zayn’s smirk has definitely intensified. 

“What’s with the Spanish Inquisition? You’re way out of line, Malik. Remember, me: boss, you: employee, got it?” Louis huffs, doing his best to sound menacing.

“Got it.” Zayn can barely hide his amusement. “Err… Boss?”

“What now?” 

“Your shirt is kinda buttoned wrong,” Zayn points out, the corners of his mouth twitching. 

“You know, you’re a terrible friend. I seriously don’t know what I see in you sometimes.” Louis puts his hands on his hips. “Since a guy can’t have any privacy around here, fetch your ciggies, we’re going for a smoke.”

“Ah, nicotine,” Zayn rhapsodises. “You really know the way to a man’s heart, Tommo. Harry’s, at least,” he adds, chuckling evilly.

“Sod off.” 

All things considered (nosy friends aside), Louis is having a fucking brilliant day, and the guilt he probably should be feeling is still nowhere in sight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	7. Chapter 7

Zayn 

Zayn has only been back a short while from visiting his family. Spending time with his parents and sisters in Bradford usually helps to clear his head. Not this time, however. 

In addition to enjoying some downtime, he followed through with his plan to contact several comic book publishers. Two of them invited him for an interview, but London and Cardiff just seem too far away from everything that's important to him at the moment. No matter which way he looks at it, he really can't entertain the idea of leaving Newcastle for the time being. His half-hearted scrolls around various dating sites were met with an equal lack of success. Sure, there was a guy or two who might have interested him a few weeks ago, but in the end it was always Mr L. Payne’s ID picture from the gym that he ended up drooling over. To sum it up, he didn’t get any closer to getting his shit together than he was before his little impromptu trip.

On the upside, ever since the ‘locked door incident’, Louis has been practically beaming with happiness, which is great to see. He and Harry are so good together—so far, at least—and Zayn would love to believe that everything will work out for them, if it wasn’t for the nagging thought that they shouldn’t underestimate Nick’s ability to hurt Louis. As much as Zayn hates to be the eternal pessimist, he is pretty sure that trouble is not all that far away.

“Please, can you check if I’ve locked the equipment cupboard in the swimming hall?” Niall rushes past the reception desk with a bunch of folders under his arm. 

“Everyone is in the fitness suite, so I have nobody to cover the desk,” Zayn says regretfully, looking up from the computer screen. 

“It’ll only take you a minute. I’m super late for my evening class. Liam is already out of the pool if that’s what you’re worried about.” Niall sports his most persuasive smile, and it’s pretty damn persuasive. “Pleeeease….”

“Ok, off you go.” Zayn isn’t supposed to leave the desk with nobody else around, but he’ll be quick. “I wouldn’t want to be responsible for your academic failure.”

“You’re a star. I’ll see you later.” With that, Niall scrambles out of the door. 

Zayn makes his way to the pool which is deserted. The door to the cupboard is locked after all, and he turns to leave when he hears voices approaching. It takes him a moment to recognise whose they are, and when he does it roots him to the spot. Max and Ben come bounding in, laughing about something that was probably only funny in their heads. When they spot Zayn, they stop, looking like they can’t quite believe their luck. 

“Would you look who it is,” Ben snarls, coming slowly towards Zayn. “How are you today, you puff?”

This is what happens when nobody is at the desk. 

“You’re not allowed to be back here. I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” His words are firm, but Zayn hopes they can’t hear the quiver in his voice.

“Oh, is that right?” Max sounds amused. “We don’t really care for being told what to do by a dirty Paki. We’re here to look for our mate, and you ain’t gonna stop us.”

Zayn’s brain runs in overdrive. He should just calmly walk past them and summon some help. 

Unfortunately, the two dimwits have other ideas. They block his way out with perfectly matched sardonic grins on their faces. 

Ben steps right in front of Zayn. “I bet you were just on your way to jack off over Payno in the shower, weren’t you? You should think about having one yourself some time. I can smell you from here.”

“Be careful,” Max says, faking seriousness, “he might set his terrorist friends on us.” Max bursts into hysterical laughter at his own joke.

“Or I could help you out with that,” Ben sneers. “How about you take a little bath right now.”

Before Zayn can grasp what that might mean, he gets pushed hard against his chest and falls backwards into the pool. 

This is his worst nightmare. It’s the deep end, and he has already swallowed far too much water. He needs to remember what Niall has told him many times: ‘Keep calm and tread water’. That’s easier said than done, though. Zayn’s arms are flailing around him and water keeps entering through his mouth and nose. Muffled shouts, which he can’t understand, reach him underwater as if through cotton wool. It’s not even that he really thinks he is going to drown, he just panics at being so utterly humiliated. 

When he eventually manages to coordinate his movements and elevate his head out of the water, he feels a big splash next to him. Oh, god, are they now going to dunk him under, when he has only just regained some control? He waits for the first attack… But instead he feels someone grabbing him around the waist, moving him swiftly along. Next thing he knows, he gets plonked onto the side of the pool. Tentatively looking up, Zayn finds a pair of dark brown eyes boring straight into his own. He knows those eyes and their familiar intensity all too well: Liam.

“What are you doing that for, Payno?” Max appears to think that his fun has just been spoilt. “You should have left him in there a bit longer. Look at him, pathetic little fucker.”

“Are you trying to get me kicked out? You’re not meant to be here, so bugger off.” Liam’s voice sounds genuinely annoyed, as far as Zayn can tell through his waterlogged ears. 

“Alright, dude, we thought you might see the funny side. Anyway, he’s not gonna tell. You want us to spell it out to him what happens if he complains to someone?”

“No, just go. I’ll deal with this and catch up with you later.” Liam pulls himself from the pool, takes both of them by the arm and ushers them out the door.

Meanwhile, Zayn hasn’t moved at all. He should really get up and sort himself out, but his head is pounding, his throat is red raw, and he feels sick from all the chlorine he swallowed.

“You ok?” Liam touches him lightly on the shoulder.

“M’fine, just leave me alone,” Zayn croaks. He doesn't want more of this shit, and he’s pretty sure he’s done nothing to deserve this kind of treatment.

Liam choses to ignore him. “Where do you keep the towels?”

“Reception.” As a regular customer, surely Liam should know this. And really, it’s so kind of him leave Zayn in the pool while he goes to take care of his own dripping clothes and hair..

“I’ll be right back.” Liam rushes off.

Wait, what? He’ll be back? 

Liam returns moments later with one of the big, plush towels. “Here, I’m just gonna get dressed. Don’t go anywhere.”

When he emerges from the changing rooms in jeans and a white t-shirt, his gym bag slung over his shoulder, Zayn is still where he was, sat on the floor in a puddle.

“You need to get up and dry off, come on.” Liam pulls him up effortlessly by his armpits.

“I told you, I’m fine,” Zayn hisses. Who does he think he is?

“No, you’re not, you’re shivering. Do you have a change of clothes?”

"Why would I? I don’t usually plan on getting chucked in the pool,” Zayn spits. He feels dizzy, needing to hold on to the wall to maintain his balance. 

"You should go home." Liam certainly is the persistent type, and he might even be making sense here. It’s hard to tell in Zayn’s muddled state.

Zayn slowly makes his way to the front desk, stopping at the studio to let Katie know he's going home a bit early. Liam is right behind him the whole time. For real, this guy needs to urgently address his issues with other people's personal space. Katie gives them a curious look but makes no comment. 

Zayn is certain he must be a miserable sight to see. Even though he is reasonably dry, he shakes like a leaf. After putting his shoes and socks into a carrier bag, he picks up his rucksack and heads for the door. For some reason, Liam is still there. He rummages in his bag until he finds a black hoodie which he hands to Zayn.

"Take it, you're freezing."

"That's not necessary, thanks, Liam... I’ll see you around." Zayn hopes that his indifferent tone will put him off. He finds it very difficult to wrap his head around Liam's behaviour. Why is he being helpful? How is he planning on hurting Zayn this time? This can only be the precursor to some cruel trick.

Against his better judgment, he puts on the hoodie. It's too big for him but very cosy, and it smells of Liam's cologne. For a second he loses himself in the thought that this jumper has been on Liam's body. Stop it, Zayn!

"I’ll go with you to your car, okay?" Liam holds the door open and gestures outside. 

"I don't have a car. Can’t drive." His daydreaming must be to blame, because as soon as he says it, he regrets it. Fuck, this oversharing has to stop, but Liam doesn't even acknowledge the information.

"So you live nearby then?" he asks, stepping into Zayn's path. 

"No, on the other side of town." Zayn tries to push past Liam. All he wants is to do is shower and sleep.

"Come on, I'll take you," Liam says without hesitation.

"I said, it's not necessary. You and your friends had your fun, now fuck off." Zayn is done with being nice. 

"They're really not my friends," Liam tells him after an awkward pause. 

"Well you could have fooled me. Now get out of my way."

Liam refuses to move and points downwards. “In case you forgot, you're not wearing any shoes, mate. I'm driving you home."

Something in his voice convinces Zayn to give in, and if he is honest with himself, the prospect of traveling on public transport with nothing on his feet is not terribly appealing. Not to mention, it’s quite possibly unsanitary.

He lets out a sharp breath and then growls, "Fine," storming out to where he knows Liam parked his car. The thing looks even more beautiful in the daylight. Liam unlocks it and throws his stuff into the boot. Opening the passenger door, Zayn hesitates. The interior is immaculate, highly polished and no rubbish anywhere. The leather seats look very inviting—if only he wasn’t soaked in pool water.

“Liam, your seats… the chlorine…”

“Just get in.” Liam dismisses his concerns with a wave of his hand.

Well, if he insists. 

“Do you want to put your bag in the back?” Liam asks while he programs the postcode into the sat nav. 

“No, I’m good.” Zayn wants to keep holding on to his backpack simply because he needs to hold on to something. 

This is just far too weird. Here he sits in this luxurious car next to the object of virtually all of his wet dreams, and he looks like some hobo with messed up hair, no shoes and reeking of damp clothes. He leans back and observes Liam through half-closed lids—the way his muscles move when he grips the gear stick and the way he strokes the steering wheel almost lovingly. He also notices the various bruises covering Liam’s arms, reminding him that there is another, very unpleasant side to him. Neither of them says a word until they reach Zayn’s address.

Liam looks the building up and down, but he doesn’t stop the engine. “This is a shop.”

“Nothing gets past you, does it? I live in the flat above it.” Zayn is becoming impatient. “Can I get out now?”

“Really? I’ve never met anyone who lives over a shop,” Liam muses. “Hey, I’ll make sure you get up there alright.”

He switches off the ignition and jumps out of the car before Zayn can voice his objections. The front door opens to the staircase which leads to Zayn’s flat. Off to the right is the entrance to the shop.

“Bloody hell, these stairs are steep,” Liam complains, but he puts one hand on each of Zayn’s shoulders and guides him up. At the top, Zayn lets himself in. Finally he can get some rest and be left alone with his thoughts. 

Liam lingers in the doorway. “Can I come in for a minute?” 

Fuck it all. Zayn would rather he didn’t, but he’s too nauseous to argue. “Suit yourself,” he bristles.

Liam smiles and steps inside. The flat is tiny, sporting a combined small living area and kitchenette. Zayn has covered his walls in his own art; it helps him improve his skills by continuing to study the finished pieces. 

Aside from the art, his living space is very light on decor. None of his furniture matches, as most items have been donated by well meaning friends and family. His books are pretty much on every surface, and his limited edition comic book figurines have pride of place on one of the kitchen counters. It’s not ideal, but since his cooking skills are largely confined to the microwave, they don’t present a problem. The bedroom is in the back, and luckily the door is closed. Something tells Zayn that Liam wouldn’t appreciate the mess that reigns in there.

“Have you done these sketches? They are awesome.” Liam is inspecting every drawing in detail, and his praise sounds completely sincere. 

“Yeah, I did art at uni. These aren’t really for public viewing,” he says pointedly, hoping Liam will stop with the scrutiny. As usual, Zayn gets uncomfortable when someone wants to discuss his works. 

“Why aren’t you using it to make money?” It seems to be a genuine question.

Zayn rubs the back of his neck then inhales deeply. “I’m not good enough, I prefer just to pursue it as a hobby, and I don’t want to talk about it.” He speaks quickly, doesn’t want to give Liam the opportunity to say anything else. “And before I forget…,” Zayn pulls the hoodie over his head, passing it to Liam, “have this back. I’m gonna have a shower.”

“I’ll just wait until you come out, um, in case you feel dizzy or something.” Liam sits down on the sofa, looking at him with a hopeful expression. 

Zayn decides to ignore him, grabs some fresh clothes and heads for his bathroom.

The picture that greets him when he comes back to the living room stops him dead in his tracks. Shuri is in Liam’s arms while he nuzzles the scruff of her neck. 

This is the cat that wants nothing to do with strangers. Even Louis, who has been here so many times, has only recently been granted permission to stroke her. And there she is, purring away like she’s known Liam for ages. Apparently not even pets can be relied on for loyalty.

“You didn’t tell me you live with this beauty.” Liam’s voice is soft. “What’s her name?”

Zayn bites back a comment about how they normally exchange carefully selected insults where pets don’t feature, but all he says is “Shuri.”

“Shuri as in Marvel’s Shuri? I mean, I noticed your Marvel figures, not to mention your artwork, and it’s such a cool coincidence that we both love comics and animals,” Liam gushes. 

What the fuck is up with this guy? Jekyll and Hyde springs to mind. Zayn is trying very hard to keep him out of his life, not bond with him over comics and felines. Is it not enough that Liam occupies his fantasies all of the time? Does he now have to turn up in his actual life, pointing out their common interests? 

“I don’t feel well, I would like to lie down now.”

Liam jumps up immediately and walks to the door looking highly apologetic. 

“Sorry, that’s so rude of me. I’m due to meet up with my girlfriend anyway.”

Seriously? Of all the things he has said and done, this is rude?

“Right, you do that.” The image of the two of them together dampens Zayn’s mood even more. (Not that he’s sure which girl to picture—the original blond or the woman from the bar. Neither one seems right for Liam.)

Liam pauses at the door and wonders aloud, “Zayn… Do you think I could have your number?”

This is getting weirder and weirder. Beyond weird, actually. Under normal circumstances he would have been delighted by this question, but the same guy who has no problem trampling repeatedly on his emotions now wants his number? Sorry, no.

“Are you going to add bullying by text to your repertoire?” Zayn asks sarcastically. 

Liam ignores the question. “I could check if you’re ok,” he says quietly. Then he adds, “Maybe I should explain..."

“We're not having this conversation now. You’re confusing the crap out of me,” Zayn interrupts with an exasperated sigh, “and I really can’t work out what it is that you want from me, Liam.”

Liam is looking straight at him, actually blushing. “I don’t know, um. I realise that after what’s happened we can’t be friends, but I just thought… maybe we could be… not enemies?”

What? Zayn can’t compute any of this, so just to do be doing something, he wordlessly holds out his hand for Liam’s phone, puts in his details, then hands it back. 

Liam goes to leave, not breaking the silence, flashing Zayn a smile that is going to haunt him forever more. A couple of seconds too late he spots the hoodie still on the sofa. His first instinct is to run after Liam, but he reasons that he can drop it off at the gym tomorrow. They won’t even have to interact.

Finally it’s time to wrap himself up in his duvet and start to digest the events of the day. There is something niggling in the back of his mind, something that Liam said. It escaped him at the time, but now he remembers. ZAYN, he called him Zayn—for the first time Liam addressed him by his name. Coupled with that endearing smile and the fact that he helped him out massively today, he’s left more bewildered than ever. 

Shuri makes a move to snuggle up to him and—after he solemnly informs her that he doesn’t approve of her traitorous behaviour—he lets her. 

.....

A few nights later, Zayn is rudely awakened by incessant banging on his door. Scrambling around for some jogging bottoms, he stumbles to the door. “Ok, ok, I’m coming.”

The banging doesn’t stop, and shit, who is this maniac, waking up half the neighbourhood at this rate? Once he opens up, everything becomes crystal clear. Literally falling into the room is an exceedingly drunk Liam. He crashes into the back of the armchair. The only armchair he owns, in fact, and he’d rather it not be destroyed.

Since he gave Liam his number, he’s only had one message from him asking if he felt better, to which he replied with a short ‘Yes, thanks." That was the last communication between them; to see him here now at this ungodly hour is a bit of a surprise, to say the least. 

“Fuck, Liam, you’re totally shitfaced. How did you get here?”

“With the m-man,” Liam stutters. 

“What man?”

“The taxi man. I left my car… m’ a good boy….” Liam is slumped over the chair. 

“It’s bloody two thirty in the morning, why are you here?” Zayn demands to know.

“Wanna see you,” Liam has moved and is currently clinging to the kitchenette counter to   
steady himself. 

He grins stupidly at Zayn and slurs, “I like you—I think you’re beautiful, and I— I lo...love your nose.” Liam does that silly little giggle that he does and proceeds to hug Zayn. He stinks like a distillery, but it’s still nice. It shouldn’t be, he should fight him off…

Zayn doesn’t. 

The words spilling out of Liam are lovely, but the theory that drunk people always tell the truth is obviously wrong. More like drunk people don’t know what the hell they’re saying. A phone buzzes in Liam’s pocket but goes unheeded. There is no way that he can go back down those stairs without risking a broken neck, and because he is already stumbling towards the bedroom, Zayn makes the quick and probably unwise decision to let him stay. 

Liam has reached the bed, sitting down heavily. His phone buzzes again, and again is ignored. Zayn catches sight of Liam’s old hoodie which he quickly kicks under the chest of drawers. Liam doesn’t have to know that contrary to his plan, he never took it to the gym. Instead he sleeps with it every night. In his defence, Liam never asked for it back. 

“Alright, then, let’s get you to bed.” Zayn tries to slide Liam’s arms out of the sleeves of his leather jacket. It’s proving to be difficult, as Liam is not co-operating.

“You’re undressing m-me. You must like me too.” He looks at Zayn with an adorable puppy dog expression in his unfocused eyes. 

“No, don't flatter yourself, and help me get this off.” Zayn can’t find it within himself to be annoyed. The jacket glides to the floor just as the phone in it buzzes yet again. Someone seems to be really desperate to talk to him. After he kicks his boots off, Liam lies back with his arms above his head, eyes closed. His t-shirt rides up revealing a delicious looking v-line. Zayn’s breath hitches, and his dick, yeah, it reacts immediately. Fucking great.

“I’m gonna be on the sofa if you need me.” He forces his thoughts away from Liam’s body, covering him with the blanket.

“Can you schtay?” Liam slurs, rolling onto his side.

No, he absolutely can’t. “I’m only next door. Shout if you want anything.”

“But… It’s lonely in here, Zaynie.” Liam props himself up on his elbow and pouts.

“Fine, if that will shut you up.”

“It will, I promise.” A satisfied smile plays around Liam’s lips before he flops back on a pillow.

Heading for the bed, Zayn puts on a t-shirt that he finds on the floor. He is just about to lie down when the buzzing resumes from Liam’s phone. Can whoever this is not grasp that he is obviously not answering? The buzzing doesn’t stop. It does. Not. Stop.

There is only one solution: Zayn gets up and searches for the phone. When he finds what he’s looking for, he is about to switch it off when the display catches his attention. 

Father Missed Call (17)

How odd. He really shouldn’t be reading other people’s phone displays. Then again, Liam’s dad is probably wondering where his son is and if he’s alright. Zayn swipes the screen and taps Message.

I’m Zayn, I’m Liam’s… Um, what exactly? Friend? Acquaintance? Verbal punch bag? He deletes what he has written and starts again.

Liam had a little too much to drink. He’s going to stay at my place tonight. No need to worry. Zayn

After sending the text, he presses the off button and returns the phone to Liam’s jacket pocket. Back in his bed, he stays as far away from his guest as he can, making sure that no part of him touches any part of Liam. How does he always get himself into these impossible situations with this guy, and how the hell is he gonna get any sleep with Liam so close?

“Zayn?” Liam has his back turned to him.

“Shut up, you promised.” There is nowhere for Zayn to escape to, he's at the edge of his bed.

“Hold me, please.”

“Go to sleep, Liam,” Zayn’s voice is shaking with a combination of trepidation and excitement.

“Please, Zayn.”

Fuck it, this is too hard to for him to resist. He turns towards Liam and carefully wraps an arm around his waist. Liam shuffles back until there is not a fraction of an inch between them, and god, Zayn almost forgot how good it feels to fall asleep with someone. It's a very lucky thing that Liam is probably too pissed to notice the boner digging into him. 

"S'nice." Liam puts his hand over Zayn's.

Zayn buries his face between Liam's shoulder blades, breathing deeply. The scent of cologne mixed with smoke and booze and perspiration, and even someone else’s perfume, is like the best aromatherapy he has ever tried. He's just gonna enjoy this and worry about the inevitable backlash that will come later, when Liam is awake and sober.


	8. Chapter 8

Louis

Like every other last Thursday of the month, Louis is checking through the payroll. He feels a warm glow in his stomach when he reads each name—every one of them represents a valued colleague, or close friend, or… or lover. 

During the last few weeks, he has been on an emotional roller coaster, to say the very least. Stolen moments with Harry are all he lives for nowadays, and there are plenty, as they have been engaging in more or less hasty blow and handjobs almost everywhere in the gym. It's both exciting and worrying. Not feeling and tasting Harry on a daily basis is quite unthinkable now, but he knows that he's living an illusion, that it could end at any moment. 

It’s clear that Harry wants more, even though he hasn't specifically said so. Louis has become quite the expert at avoiding the topic, because he can sense feelings emerging towards Harry which he'd rather not acknowledge. Nick is the other issue—and perhaps the main one. He seems to be getting more possessive by the day; maybe he senses Louis' put on enthusiasm when they're together. To top it off, he is coming to check the books today. Luckily, Zayn is doing the very late shift, and their paths are unlikely to cross. 

The whole situation is a time bomb waiting to explode, and Louis can't find a way to stop it from happening. Harry is like a drug for him, he wants and needs to be with him. Everything looks possible in his presence, but as soon as they separate, the familiar doubts creep in. 

The last pay slip on his desk is Niall's, and he looks at it almost nostalgically. The lad’s time at the gym is coming to an end. Just a couple of months and he will have completed his degree, returning to Ireland for the start of a great career. Louis is certain that it will be a massive loss for this place both on a professional and a personal level. Niall has become a close friend, but Louis has nothing more to offer him, so the occasional meet up will have to do in the future. 

And then, last but far from least, there’s the Zayn situation. Something is definitely going on in his life, but he’s being evasive, and Louis feels terrible for not making more effort to find out what it is. Before his mood gets too morose, Louis decides to go and look for Harry whose class should have finished a little while ago. He finds him at reception with Niall who is talking about his favourite topic.

“I bet you, if you’re gonna look into the studio right now you will see them laughing and giggling together,” the Irishman whines. “She touches him all the time, does she have to do that? Is that necessary?”

“Yes, she’s his personal trainer, that’s what happens,” Harry reasons, waving at Louis as he approaches. “Back me up here, Lou. He’s got this thing in his head that Sophia is in mortal danger by coaching Liam.”

“I never said that,” Niall retorts. “All I’m saying is that she doesn’t know what he’s like, and someone should tell her. Why is she flirting with him, anyway? I thought she wants to be with Pete.”

“She flirts with him cause he’s hot, obviously,” Harry supplies casually, making Louis throw him a disapproving look.

“Not helping, Haz.” 

“I was just making an objective observation.” Harry apparently finds amusement in Niall’s ever increasing anxiety levels. “But you can discuss this all with her in person, ‘cause here she comes,” he quips.

“Discuss what?” Sophia puts her bag on the counter, taking a swig from her water bottle. 

Harry shrugs, pointing at Niall who is visibly struggling to keep calm. “Soph, about Payne...,” he starts, only for Sophia to interrupt him sharply.

“Not that again, god. I’m not talking to you about Liam anymore. If you want to hate him, that’s up to you, but leave me alone with your juvenile bullshit.”

“You just don't want to believe it, do you? Your client is homophobic, opinionated and potentially violent. All he wants to do is sleep with you." Niall is shouting now which, quite frankly, Louis has never heard him do before and didn’t really think he was of the temperament to do so. 

Sophia moves her face close to his. “Ok, I've listened to you, now consider this Niall: Maybe I can’t wait to sleep with him either,” she says calmly, and leaves without another glance at anyone. The ensuing silence is deafening.

“Ouch,” Harry says finally, barely managing to suppress an amused smirk. 

“I’m glad you’re finding this funny, Styles. Thanks for being such an amazing friend.” Niall pushes himself off his seat and storms out of the front door. 

"Do you see what I see here, Harry?" Louis asks.

"Such as?"

Louis sighs heavily. “Two people liking each other but can't get their crap together?"

"Yeah, I see that," Harry says, “and it seems to be a thing around here, wouldn't you say?"

Louis pretends that he hasn't heard that dig. “Poor guy,” he tuts. “You need to talk to him, you know. That was quite harsh."

"Fair enough, but I've never seen him like this. She really has him rattled." Harry leans forward, resting his hand on Louis' forearm. “You know, it’s so tense around here… We should go out for an extended lunch," he suggests, waggling his eyebrows.

"For the gazillionth time, I can't risk being seen anywhere near here with you."

Why can't Harry get it into his head that this is how things have to be? Louis glances at him and just catches the disappointment in his eyes before it's gone. He hates having to say these things, and it's getting more and more difficult to force out the words neither of them want to hear. Harry is stirring emotions in him that he cannot entertain at the moment. 

"You're not gonna be seen, and you're not gonna be around here. I know a really remote spot which you now have the honour of driving us to," Harry beams. 

The thought of being alone with him in some secluded place gets Louis hot under the collar, and it’s a much nicer heat than the one previously filling this room. Anger, that is. He agrees before he has time to find reasons against it.

"Not for too long, though, I'm expecting Nick to come in later," he says quietly, staring studiously at the floor. Louis really hopes mentioning his partner won’t put Harry off their lunch plans.

"Great, let me go get the picnic stuff and we can be on our way." Harry is already getting up without commenting on that item of news. 

A picnic? Louis has never been to one, trust Harry to come up with something like that. He returns with a woven basket in one hand and a cosy looking blanket in the other. The little shit had this planned all along. Louis' expression melts into a fond smile as he yet again throws caution to the wind and leads the way out to his car. 

 

It takes them a good thirty minutes to get to the place. Harry chose it well, and he wasn't kidding when he said it was remote. It looks somewhat like a maze with various patches of soft grass surrounded by huge hedges. As promised, there's not a soul in sight. When Harry puts down the picnic basket and the blanket, arranging it carefully so there aren’t any wrinkles, he's right in his element. 

"How the hell did you find this place? Do you take all your conquests out here?" Louis asks with raised eyebrows (and a strange, tight feeling in his chest that may or may not be jealousy waiting to strike, depending on Harry’s answer). 

Harry gives him a funny look. “Only the ones that ask stupid questions. Come and help me get the food out," he mutters. 

Louis goes to get some of the stuff out of the basket. There are numerous plastic containers with everything from homemade pasties to fresh fruit, as well as matching plastic plates and napkins. Harry has thought of everything and Louis, well, he can't help but smile.

“This is really lovely, nobody has taken me on a picnic before."

Harry looks at him softly. It’s not pity in his eyes, exactly, but more of a wistfulness. “I've told you there are things missing from your life that you don't even know about."

This is dangerous conversation territory, so Louis quickly sits down and starts to sample the tempting things on offer. They chat about this and that until most of the food is gone. 

"Wow, that was delicious! We should do this more often, you're an excellent cook," Louis praises and leans back on his elbows. 

"It has been my pleasure,” Harry smiles. “By the way, do you like Bukowski?"

"Love his work, why?" Louis questions.

Harry positions himself behind Louis with his legs on either side of him. “Close your eyes and relax," he prompts, reaching into the basket for a copy of 'South of No North'. 

Louis falls back against his chest and does as he is told.

"You're gonna read to me about loneliness and personal struggles?" he asks. “That’s an interesting way to pass the time while a meal settles.”

"Take from it what you wish. Besides, I'm reading, therefore I get to chose the material." Harry grins, planting an affectionate peck on Louis' hair. He then proceeds to read one of the stories whilst playing with the fingers of Louis' right hand. Louis feels that he must have died and gone to heaven, totally entranced by Harry's deep voice. The guy could read to him from the phone book, and he would be just as captivated. 

Honestly, if he had to pick the most perfect moment in his life, this would have to be it. Harry's playful fingers have moved under Louis' shirt and onto his stomach, where he is drawing little circles that make his skin heat up and his nerves stand at attention. 

"Hey, I thought we were having a literary moment here," he protests, but it doesn't sound convincing. 

"Shhh," Harry puts his finger on Louis' lips, teasingly tugging on the lower one as soon as he’s sure he’ll remain silent. “We are. That doesn't mean we can't cater to our physical needs at the same time. The story is almost finished, anyway." He drops his hand to drum an imaginary beat along Louis' inner thigh, and Louis' remaining interest in Bukowski vanishes. 

He takes the book from Harry, who doesn't seem to be opposed to the change of plan, placing it carefully on the blanket next to them (which he thinks is saying quite a lot for his powers of restraint). Now, though, there’s no more holding back. Louis turns himself around, impulsively pushing Harry onto his back and positioning himself on top of him. He slowly grinds their crotches together, locking his lips onto Harry's. 

Thank god for this secluded location and Harry’s foresight in bringing them here.

"Louis Tomlinson, you are taking advantage of me," Harry mumbles when they break the kiss.

"Don't pretend you didn't have it all worked out in that pretty head of yours," Louis counters, in between nipping at Harry's neck and fumbling to undo his belt. When he succeeds, he opens the zip and and button before precariously lifting himself up on one elbow and removing Harry's jeans in one swift move. Well, as swiftly as possible with how tightly they fit him. Doing his best to help too, Harry pulls his shirt off, then does the same to Louis'. 

Seeing him lying there totally naked with his hair fanned out around him makes Louis happy, anxious, protective and totally turned on all at the same time. However, instead of analysing these feelings further, he slides down to take Harry into his mouth. But when Louis is halfway there, Harry stops him. 

“Lou, I want you inside me, please," he whispers. 

Oh. Wow. It's been a long time since he topped, and he's not mentally prepared for this.

"Are you sure?" he asks, mostly to give himself an extra moment to think.

"Been sure since I first saw you crossing that car park," Harry groans, removing Louis’ trousers impatiently. 

“I don’t have anything…,” Louis starts.

“In the basket under the fruit salad,” Harry smirks, his hands roaming all over Louis’ newly uncovered arse and back. 

It’s such a remarkable feeling, giving himself over to Harry’s touch, he almost forgets to be shocked by that bit of presumptuousness. Condoms in a picnic basket, really? Still lying atop Harry, Louis angles himself awkwardly so he’s able to reach the basket and, as promised, he finds a small tub of lube, a packet of wipes and some condoms under the plastic container.

The way their bodies slide together is delicious, and Harry wriggles underneath him, squeezing Louis’ ass. “Come on, Lou, now you’re being cruel.”

“How do you want it?” Louis’ asks as he bends low and runs his tongue along Harry’s abdomen, teasingly avoiding his cock. 

“Now, Louis, I want you now… And I want to look at you.” Harry has somehow managed to unwrap a condom and waves it under Louis’ nose.

“Patience, Haz,” Louis snatches it from Harry’s fingers and puts it next to him. He smiles inwardly, slicking up his fingers. If he ever pictured sex with Harry (and he did), the beautiful brunet was always looming over Louis, ready to make him lose all his inhibitions. Yet here they are, positions reversed, and Louis finds he wouldn’t have it any other way. At least not for their first time.

The circles that he makes around Harry's hole cause Harry to moan rather obscenely, already worked up and desperate for penetration. Humouring him, Louis carefully inserts one finger—followed by two more not long after Harry begs him to get on with it. When the preparations start to feel almost clinical, he bends down to cover Harry's mouth affectionately with his, and hell, Harry's lips might just be the most kissable ones he has ever experienced. 

His own dick urges him to do something, but for Harry's sake he tries not rush things. After rather a lot of pumping and stretching, he gently crooks his fingers at exactly the right angle, judging by Harry's enthusiastic reaction. He pushes down on Louis' fingers, whimpering, "Please, Lou....," and then he begs once more. Since Louis himself can’t wait any longer, he puts Harry’s trembling legs over his shoulders, rolls on the condom and lines himself up with Harry’s entrance. Replacing his fingers with his painfully throbbing dick is an intense sensation, even with only about an inch inside, and he has to go slowly at first to avoid premature climax. He is somewhat out of practise, after all, and therefore can’t be blamed. 

Harry is having none of that, grabbing Louis by the hips and trying to force a faster pace. There is no holding back for Louis now, as he holds on to Harry’s legs and buries himself deep into him. 

Just like that, Louis loses all sense of time and place. Here is the moment he has thought about a million times, and he can barely focus. Harry squirms underneath him and keeps pushing a hand partway down his own abdomen like he wants nothing more than to grasp his dick and bring himself over the edge. It becomes a bit of a contest: who can hold out longer? 

To Louis’ surprise and delight, Harry loses it first, stroking from the base of his cock to the top and squeezing right under the head, then coming with a shudder, shooting thick strands of come all over his chest. Louis is not far behind. He may have lasted slightly longer, which is cause for pride, but he’s embarrassed by a shamefully loud moan that escapes him before he collapses on top of Harry. It doesn’t matter, though; this must surely be heaven. 

"Wow, Lou, I didn't think you could get any more gorgeous, but you've just proved me wrong," Harry sighs, his eyes closed. 

When their breathing normalises, Louis scrambles away to dispose of the condom and to retrieve the wipes.

After gently cleaning Harry up, he reluctantly gathers their clothes. “We’d better make a move, Haz, you know what the boss is like," he quips, dropping Harry’s stuff on top of him where he’s still reclining on the blanket. 

Harry looks deep in thought, standing and climbing into his jeans. Louis isn't sure he should be asking, but he does it anyway. 

"What's wrong, Haz?"

"Nothing." Storing the picnic basket in the back of the car, Harry tosses a wan smile over his shoulder but doesn't look at him directly. 

"Harry?" Louis repeats, unconvinced. 

“Does this change anything?” Harry asks finally, and he gingerly walks back to where Louis stands, folded blanket tucked in his arms.

“What do you mean?” Louis has the sinking feeling that, this time, he can’t dodge this stress-inducing yet important question.

Harry holds him by the shoulders. “I mean, what is our relationship status? Does this kind of thing mean anything to you? Will you ever consider being with me full time?”

“But you said…” Louis starts.

Harry cuts him off him immediately. “I know what I’ve said, just thought you might change your mind over time,” he says in a clipped tone. 

Louis is searching frantically for something to say that will diffuse the situation. In the end, what comes out sounds rather lame. “You make me very happy, Haz, and what just happened was amazing, really, but you know I have my reasons for—”

“Save it, Louis. You know what I think? I think you use all your reasons as an excuse so you don’t have to evaluate your shitty life arrangement… Nevermind, let’s just go.” Harry shoulders past Louis a bit carelessly on his way to the car.

“Hazza, please, you don’t understand, you’re very important to me.” Louis can’t believe he is actually saying all this stuff. It sounds like a hollow cliche straight from a bad romance novel. Harry is slouching in the passenger seat, his face like a mask, indicating that he is done with this conversation.

Louis gets behind the wheel, re-playing all the events of the afternoon in his head. The silence in the car is so uncomfortable. He knows he should try and make things better between them but what can he say? Tell him about all these feelings that he can’t even identify himself? Admit that he is too much of a coward to make changes? He is not a risk taker; he needs Harry more than Harry needs him, that’s for sure. In the end, Louis goes the whole drive without saying another word.

Back at the gym, he stops in the far corner of the car park, hoping that maybe Harry has cooled off and they can part ways peacefully, but he jumps out straight away.

“Don’t worry, I’ll use the staff entrance.”

With that, he slams the door and strides towards the back of the building. Louis rests his head on the steering wheel, questioning just about everything he formerly thought made sense about this situation. 

And truly, he feels horrible for waiting until Harry has disappeared around the corner, but it is what it is (total cowardice). When he can’t see him any longer, he leaves his car and rushes to his office; luckily nobody approaches him on his way there. Safely inside, he shuts the door firmly and tries to distract himself by doing some paperwork. When Jess rings to let him know that Nick has arrived, he hasn’t got much to show for his efforts, so it’s with a certain amount of relief that he leaves his desk to go and meet his boyfriend. 

“Louis! There you are,” Nick greets him enthusiastically, and Louis’ heart drops into his stomach. Nick is standing at the counter with none other than Harry, who flashes Louis a smile that never reaches his eyes. Nick has his hand placed casually on Harry’s lower arm, yet somehow it looks proprietary. Louis can’t even begin to comprehend what he sees.

“Darling, you haven’t told me about this charming new addition to the team. How could you not? Harry has just been telling me how very much he enjoys working here.” All of a sudden, Louis knows Nick has added Harry to his list of people to be paranoid about. Unfortunately, any accusations Nick will lob his way later—unlike his comments regarding Zayn—won’t be unfounded. While Louis stews, Nick continues in a smarmy tone. “I think we should try and make him feel welcome. A couple of my business associates are coming for dinner tonight, and I have invited Harry along to keep you company. You do get bored with all the corporate talk don’t you, baby?” Nick addresses Louis but doesn’t take his gaze away from Harry. Though Nick is a bit taller, he tilts his head downward and looks up through his lashes.

A little flicker runs across Harry’s face at the usage of that pet name, but he quickly regains his composure. “That’ll be fun, won’t it?” He winks at Louis, subtly and inexplicably moving closer to Nick. 

Louis isn’t able to respond. What the actual fuck is Harry doing? Ok, so he is upset, yes. But this?

“Well, I take that as a yes, then.” Nick breaks out in a broad smile. “Suppose I should go take care of the last minute details for our soiree. I can check those books another time. I’ll see you boys later.” He goes over to Louis and kisses him deeply, gripping his neck possessively with one broad hand. Louis remains totally unresponsive, keeping his eyes open and watching Harry walk off with a small wave in his direction. Nick lets go off him and, after giving him a stinging slap on his ass, he picks up his briefcase and leaves.

Louis is left stunned and bewildered: Harry is going to be at their house tonight. The man he just made love to will be within the walls of the home Louis shares with his partner. This has to be a nightmare. Surely, any moment now he will wake up. But alas, he is not asleep, and the reality that this is happening slowly sinks in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys
> 
> Just want to let those who are waiting on an update of the Ziam situation know that it will arrive shortly. This chapter just had to happen first. :)
> 
> And many thanks to those who leave kudos and kind messages. It is very much appreciated. x

Louis 

The rest of the afternoon is a blur to Louis. No matter how many times he goes over what’s happened, he still has no explanation as to why he fucked up so badly. If only he could turn the clock back… He thought about not going home but dismissed the idea in the end because he needs to try and speak with Harry before Nick gets his claws into him. 

By the time he ties off the loose ends at work and gets home, the party has already started. No expense seems to have been spared on the buffet (though Louis fleetingly thinks that Harry could have probably done a much better job.) Everybody has already arrived, including Harry and some well-dressed people Louis vaguely remembers from previous dinners. 

Nick comes to greet Louis with over-the-top gestures like he always does when they have company.. Louis brushes him off, after a chaste kiss on the cheek, with the excuse that he needs to mingle. It’s alright, because the other guests are nice enough, but sadly have nothing to say that he is even remotely interested in. Then there’s the fact that Harry is actively avoiding him, deflecting Louis’ every attempt to have a word. If and when they make brief eye-contact, Harry’s expression is cold, and it feels like Louis is being punched in the chest each time. 

Throughout the rather sedate evening, Nick is the perfect host, saying all the right things to ensure his clients will give him their continued business. Louis, in direct contrast, assumes his usual role as drinks server and is otherwise more seen than heard. As for Harry? He’s busy throwing his famous charm around, mesmerising everyone he talks to. The ladies giggle at whatever anecdote he’s telling them, and the men keep slapping him approvingly on the back. Louis has no idea what they are talking about, but it occurs to him that in this setting, Harry would be a more ideal partner for Nick. It’s not a thought that he enjoys whichever way he looks at it.

The hours pass by, painfully slow. He has given up trying to talk to Harry, tuning in and out of what Nick is saying. There’s no need to be attentive, anyway, it’s always the same bollocks.

“Yes, my Louis still runs that exercise place of his,” Nick laughs, in his typical condescending manner. “It keeps him busy and out of mischief, doesn’t it, honey?”

Louis just smiles politely. He sees Harry watching him from behind his glass, averting his gaze as soon as Louis looks back at him. Louis notices that even though Harry gets many drinks given to him, he only sips at them before putting them down on out of the way surfaces.

This whole situation would merely be boring and not humiliating if only Nick would stop talking about him, but Louis has no such luck. 

“We are very secure in our relationship,” his boyfriend brags. “Trust is the most important thing in my opinion, and there is no shortage of that with us, isn’t that right, my love?”

Nick is even more full of shit than usual; the whole evening is totally bizarre. At long last, it looks as if the event is nearing its end, and that’s a damn good thing. Nick is becoming merrier by the minute and flirts shamelessly with Harry, touching him whenever he gets the chance. 

“So, Harry, why is a lovely guy like you still unattached?” He puts his hand on Harry’s knee, rubbing the pad of his thumb gently over the joint. 

Harry turns to give him his full attention, offering a dazzling smile that appears to get Nick hot and bothered. 

“I just haven’t found ‘the one’ yet,” he says sincerely, now including the rest of the guests in the conversation. 

Nick chuckles. “The one? That’s a bit of an outdated concept, isn’t it?”

“Not at all,” Harry replies sweetly, “and I firmly believe that there is one soulmate for everyone in this world. Sure, you meet nice people, you have fun and you spend part of your life with them, but in the end—all you’re doing is searching for that one person.”

The room has fallen completely silent, guests clearly trying to work out if he is serious or not. Evidently they come to the conclusion that he meant what he said, and every one of them is presently assessing their own relationship in silence. Louis, on the other hand, just wants to scream. 

He wants to go over to Harry and tell him that he is sorry, and that he needs him, but he stays mum, watching the people leave one by one, except Harry. He hangs back, swaying a little, holding on to Nick’s shoulder for support. This is definitely fake, he hardly drank anything. What the hell is he doing? Louis can’t tear his eyes away from them. 

“I’m gonna head off now, thanks for your hospitality,” Harry slurs slightly. “Would you be so good as to call for a taxi?” 

“There’s no need, you can stay in one of the guest rooms,” Nick offers, now with both hands on Harry’s waist and slipping lower. 

Louis doesn’t know what Harry’s game is, but he can’t take any more of this. “I’m going to bed,” he mumbles, getting up to leave. 

“You do that, honey. I’ll stay with Harry until he is steady enough to go upstairs.” Nick literally leers at Harry, who flashes Louis a shrewd look. Louis’ heart feels like it’s ripping apart at the sight of the two men clinging together. Every emotion he has ever felt for either of them surfaces, and they all make sense now. Fuck it, he can’t stay here. 

“On second thought, I’m gonna leave you to it,” he croaks.

“But, Louis,” Nick says half-heartedly.

Louis bolts out of the front door, stumbles down the stairs and throws himself into his car. There is only one place he wants to go and one person he wants to see right now. He prays that Zayn is still at work.

 

Luckily the lights at the gym are still on, and he is thankful for this small piece of good fortune. vrZayn is about to lock up when Louis bursts through the entrance, launching himself into his friend’s strong, wiry arms. He sobs uncontrollably, leaving Zayn’s shirt soaked in no time, and Zayn just lets him cry for a bit, rubbing his back soothingly. 

“What happened, Louis?” he finally asks.

“It’s Harry,” Louis sniffles into Zayn’s chest.

“What about him?”

Louis pulls back a little and looks at Zayn with bloodshot eyes. They’re red, but the truth is shining clearly from them. “I love him, Zayn. I really love him.”

Zayn looks confused. “That is a good thing, isn’t it?”

Louis’ eyes well up again. “He’s with Nick…at the house…and—he’s gonna be with him, I know it…. Oh, god, Zayn, I can’t stand it…,” he stutters between sobs.

“Woah, wait a minute, Lou. He wouldn’t do that.”

“He hates me, Zayn, I made him hate me…. I hurt him, but he won’t let me apologize. He doesn’t even know that I love him.” Louis descends into another wave of tears.

“Ok, babe, sit down.” Zayn pushes him gently into the visitor’s chair. “I’ll get you a hot drink and we’ll talk some more because what you're saying makes no sense.”

Louis nods, shrinking into the chair, his feet tucked under his bottom. He cannot remember ever feeling this miserable before. What if they are in bed together this very moment? Louis' chest constricts at the thought, and not necessarily because his current boyfriend may be cheating on him. In fact, he has never paid much attention to what Nick gets up to during his business trips, mainly because he doesn’t really care all that much—at least not in recent months. Why is he even still with Nick? The answer has been staring him in the face, but it took Harry to spell it out for him. 

“I’m a coward and I’m selfish,” he whispers when Zayn returns with his tea, not even delaying their discussion long enough to take the first sip. Funny that he knows exactly how Louis likes to drink it while Nick still has no clue. 

“You’re neither of those things,” Zayn says, kneeling in front of Louis’ chair.

“But I am.” Louis grips his cup so hard that his knuckles turn white. “I live with a guy who provides me with every material thing I could possibly want, who keeps my business afloat when money is tight, and in return I stay with him. Take into account that I have nowhere else to go and apart from my shed of a car, I don’t own a thing. If he didn’t run the numbers side of things here, we would have closed ages ago. I’m not a businessman Zayn, no idea why I took this on in the first place.”

“Because you’re a good guy,” Zayn tries to reassure him. “You did what you considered right for your family, and you keep going out of affection for the people who work here. Please don’t beat yourself up like this. I’m sure things between you and Harry can be sorted, and I still don’t believe that he’ll do anything with Nick.”

“You—you didn’t see the coldness in his eyes. And even if you’re right, he’s not going to stay with a guy like me, he’ll get bored. I watched him tonight, drawing people into his space. He won’t be satisfied with me.” Louis’ voice is shaky. 

Zayn wraps his arms around his friend. “Shut up, Lou. What happened to the confident little twat that I met in that pub? Just because my dick and your dick couldn’t come to an agreement, doesn’t mean that you’re not hot as fuck and beautiful inside and out. He’d be lucky to have you.”

A weak smile appears on Louis’ face. “I love you, Zaynie. Where would I be without you?” He runs his hand affectionately down Zayn’s cheek.

“Are you gonna stay at mine tonight?” Zayn asks.

“No, I need to be by myself, need to think. I’ll stay in the first aid room. I have a change of clothes and wash stuff in my office.”

“Well, If you’re sure,” Zayn says reluctantly. He doesn’t look too happy about that arrangement.

Louis changes the subject before Zayn can object further. “By the way, have I not explicitly instructed you to lock the door behind the last client? I could have been anyone or Liam.”

Zayn is tidying the last items from the counter, but his head whips around at the mention of Liam’s name. 

“Yes, Liam.” Louis reiterates. “He could have barged in here instead of me.”

“I wish,” Zayn says, barely loud enough for Louis to hear.

But yeah, he heard. “Excuse me, Zayn? Do you have something to tell me? Has anything else happened with you and him?”

Zayn looks away. “I’ve run into him once or twice and…”

“And?” Louis is fully alert now. He’s been such an asshole friend lately, taking support and advice but not giving them back when they’re needed by someone else.

“He might have stayed at my place last night,” Zayn says, and he does this thing where he swallows the end of his words so people can’t quite understand him.

Louis understands well enough, though. “He stayed at yours and….?”

“No, nothing like that.” Zayn shakes his head. “He was pissed so I let him stay.”

Louis looks at him incredulously. “And he knows where you live, how?”

“From when he drove me home the other day,” Zayn informs him.

“He drove you home?! Why?”

“Well, when the guys that Liam hangs around with threw me in the pool, he fished me out and then he felt sorry for me and drove me home.” Zayn’s words tumble from his lips as if saying them really fast will make them sound better. 

Louis’ face resembles that of a goldfish. He opens and closes his mouth repeatedly without finding any words to say.

Eventually he spits, “Moronic members of the public try and drown my staff in my own pool, and no one feels it’s important enough to tell me about it?” He shakes his head in utter disbelief.

“You have a lot on your plate, and it’s ok, s’fine, honestly,” Zayn defends himself.

“First of all, promise me you’ll be careful, and secondly, you haven't heard the last of this.” Louis breathes a resigned sigh. “Now you need to hurry or you’ll miss your bus. Do you want me to drop you home instead?”

Zayn declines. “No, you get yourself sorted out. Are you still going to the party tomorrow?”

Shit, he totally forgot about tomorrow’s big occasion. “I owe it to Sophia and Niall to attend. I’ll keep a low profile,” he decides.

“Ok, babe, I’ll go then. Ring me if you need me and don’t worry too much, yeah?” Zayn squeezes Louis one more time before he disappears into the night.

Knowing already that he won’t be able to sleep a wink, Louis gets his things from the office and beds down in the other room. He feels the tears forming in his eyes again; maybe he should have taken Zayn up on his offer, after all. Oh, well, it’s too late now. And anyway, he needs to put on his thinking cap before he swaps it for his metaphorical night-cap. This is more important than sleep. He simply cannot lose Harry when he has only just found him.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is guys, it took a bit longer than expected and as always thanks for reading :)

Zayn 

Zayn has to run for the last bus, something that he very rarely does. He smiles at the driver, choosing a seat at random on the empty vehicle. What a day, he thinks, and he really hopes that Louis is ok. While he feared that things would go wrong and that Nick would be involved, this was not what he had in mind. He dials his number but doesn’t press Call. Louis will get in touch if he wants him for anything. Looking at his phone, he opens Liam’s text from this afternoon.

Thank you for letting me stay. Next time, don’t interfere please. Liam

Zayn spent all day trying to work out what that message means. When he woke up this morning, Liam was gone, which was both a relief and a disappointment. If it hadn’t been for the faint smell of Liam’s cologne on the other pillow, Zayn might have thought it was all a dream.

When he enters his flat, his cat doesn’t rush towards him as usual but peeks out from under the coffee table with ‘guilty’ written all over her face. The reason for this becomes immediately apparent, as Zayn trips over empty milk cartons and cat food tins. Shuri has been in the bin again leaving Zayn with a lot of rubbish to clean up.

This has been an underwhelming day: the stuff with Louis, the cryptic text from Liam and now Shuri’s antics. It's almost midnight, so Zayn has a quick shower and decides on cereal for his dinner—anything else seems like too much hassle. As he eats in quiet solitude, he wonders how Louis is getting on. Ringing him this late is probably not a good idea, in case he has managed to go to sleep. Zayn is contemplating whether or not to watch some TV before heading to bed himself when there is a knock on the door. 

His first thought is Louis, but when he opens up, a dishevelled Liam is leaning against the frame. His shirt is torn at the shoulder and stained with blood which comes from a cut over his eye. Fresh bruises cover his right arm, his hair a mess. Zayn has a distinct and disappointing sense of deja vu.

“Liam, you can’t keep doing this,” Zayn protests weakly. “You have to stop coming here drunk and expecting me to put you up for the night. And you’ve been in another fight? Really, Liam, I need some sleep.”

Liam winces as he pushes himself off the door frame. “Sorry, Zayn, I shouldn’t have come here,” he groans as he turns to leave.

“No wait, you’re injured, let’s get you cleaned up a little first,” Zayn relents. 

He carefully guides Liam to the sofa. Now that he is over the initial shock, he realises that Liam doesn’t look, sound or smell as if he has been drinking. He goes to see what he can find in his bathroom cabinet and comes back with antiseptic wipes, a sterile dressing and some painkillers which he was prescribed when he twisted his ankle trying out his old skateboard. As gently as he can, he removes the blood from Liam’s face, covering the cut with the dressing.

“Your shirt is ruined, but luckily I still have your hoodie.” Zayn gets the jumper and helps Liam, who is clearly hurting more than he wants to admit, out of his tshirt. The angry bruises on Liam’s ribs make Zayn reach for the medicine. Liam grimaces when he takes the tablets, though he doesn’t complain. 

“Shouldn’t you maybe see a doctor?” Zayn suggests. “And maybe you should also stop getting into brawls,” he adds. 

“Nah, it’s nothing, I’ve been worse, and it’s still none of your business.” Liam lifts his eyes, his expression defiant. 

So why come to me then, is on the tip of Zayn’s tongue but a look into Liam’s pale face has him swallowing that remark.

“At least go home, then. You need to rest, and those pills will make you drowsy. Let me ring for—” Zayn starts.

“I don’t wanna go home,” Liam interrupts him. 

“But your family can look after you better than I can, they—” Zayn carries on undeterred, but Liam cuts him off again.

“Shut up, I’m not going home alright? Stop talking about shit you know nothing about.” Liam is agitated, glaring at Zayn.

“Why do you always have to be so rude. I’m trying to help you here, but if you’re gonna be a dick you might as well leave now. I can't do this hot and cold thing with you anymore. What's wrong with going home, anyway?” Zayn is sitting down next to Liam, demanding an answer.

Liam stares down at the floor, wringing his hands, but says nothing. 

"Well?" Zayn is determined to get to the bottom of this, even if it places a strain on their tentative ceasefire. 

"Home is where I get hurt," Liam whispers. His fists are now clenched in his lap, and his shoulders are hunched, subconsciously ready to defend himself.

Zayn goes cold inside at the other man’s words and posture. “Liam, no… What…who would… Don’t make jokes like that,” he babbles.

“S’no joke.” Liam looks at him with such sad eyes that Zayn has no doubt he is telling the truth.

He takes Liam’s hand without thinking. “But who, and— and why? I don’t understand.” His fingers caress Liam’s wrist, one place where he doesn’t appear to be wounded, at least.

"It's my father… I disappoint him. He thinks I'm gay," Liam admits, shrinking deeper into the sofa. 

"And are you?" Zayn can't get his head around what Liam has just told him. Whether or not Liam’s answer is yes, the situation is unacceptable.

"I dunno. I guess, yeah… But I can't be, I just can't," Liam says desperately. 

"It's not a fucking lifestyle choice, Liam," Zayn huffs.

"That's easy for you to say." Liam shifts gingerly into a more comfortable position. “You're everything that I'm not."

"What are you talking about?" Zayn questions. 

"You're confident, talented, beautiful and you have great friends who have your back. I bet your family supports you as well," Liam says in a small voice. 

"Yes, they do," Zayn confirms, “but it took me a long time to get this far. What about the rest of your folks?"

"There is no one else, my mum died when I was six. The only clear thing that I remember about her is that she sang to me at bedtime. Father was never the same after she’d gone, he has only me and just lashes out sometimes. He says that I’m not normal and that mum would have been ashamed of me, what if that’s true? ” Liam sounds distant as if he’s forgotten that he is not alone.

“Liam, that is a horrible thing for him to say,” Zayn carefully puts his arm around Liam’s shoulders, his heart bleeds for him,” You can’t keep letting him abuse you, that’s awful. All those injuries I saw, I just thought....," Zayn breaks off.

"I wish it was fighting...at least that would be less embarrassing," Liam hides his face in his hands. 

Zayn cannot believe that this is the same Liam he thought he knew. Turns out he got it all wrong. Why does he immediately give Harry the benefit of the doubt but condemn Liam without a shred of solid evidence? Liam looks very tired, the tablets must be taking effect, but Zayn has so many questions.

“What about your girlfriend? What does she think about it? Or your friends?”

Liam closes his eyes, letting his head fall against the back of the sofa,”I told you before, they are not my friends, our fathers do business together. As for Ellie… we don’t have that kind of relationship. We go out, we drink, we fuck and I buy her stuff, that’s about it. They don’t know anything, they think, like you, that I get into fights a lot.”

“So let me get this straight, you get some girl to go out with you, hang around with total douchebags and pretend to be this brawler so that people don’t find out that you’re gay?” Zayn rolls his eyes.

Liam just nods wordlessly. 

"Obviously your father isn't convinced," Zayn remarks. 

"He goes through my things, finds mags and stuff. Sometimes he catches me on the Internet, looking at porn, that's when he flips. I try and tell him I'll change but he doesn't believe me." 

Oh wow, Liam had a lot further to go than Zayn had first thought. 

"I always mean to be more careful," Liam says, sighing wistfully" And then today..." his voice trails off."

"What happened today?" Zayn's gut feeling is that he most likely doesn't want to hear this. 

"Your text - he asked around who you are and put two and two together," Liam looks up into Zayn's horrified face," You couldn’t have known, don't worry," he adds with a weak smile, struggling to keep his eyes open. 

Zayn's stomach churns at the image of Liam being hurt just because he was annoyed by the buzzing phone and had to stick his nose into things that don't concern him. Now that message from Liam makes perfect sense. He motions him to lie down, guiding his head into his lap. Somehow he manages to resist the urge to stroke Liam's hair. A little while later, Liam's breathing becomes steady and even, his body is relaxed, he has finally fallen asleep. Even though Zayn's legs are numb by now, he can't bring himself to get up just yet. Instead he studies every detail of Liam's face. He looks so lovely and peaceful. A stray strand of hair is stuck to his forehead. Zayn moves it back into place with a gesture that can only be described as loving. When he absolutely has to move his legs to restore blood circulation, he slowly slides out from under Liam. Shuri has already settled herself on his thighs. If he's honest, Zayn can't really blame her. He tucks his house guest in and falls heavily into his own bed, leaving the door ajar in case Liam needs him. He drifts off to sleep but not before he gets himself off to his favourite fantasy, reliving the locker room scene in which Liam doesn't cause him to come embarrassingly into his jeans but hitches him up against the locker, wrapping Zayn's legs around his waist and after getting him ready with his amazing fingers, Liam pounds into him until they both slide to the floor.

.....

 

The sound of the lid crashing onto the metal bin wakes Zayn. He jumps out of bed, planning to let that bloody cat know that enough is enough. On entering the living room he is faced with Liam who is in the process of folding the blanket he had used. He looks miles better which is a great relief. Currently he is eyeing Zayn up and down, not even trying to hide it. Zayn is suddenly acutely aware that he is only wearing his boxers where a semi is straining against the material. Before it can get any more awkward, he retreats hastily to his room and throws on some jeans and a jumper in record time. After running a brush through his hair he walks into his living room for the second time this morning.

Liam, holding Shuri in his arms, is smiling at him,” I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m just gonna shoot home and get changed.”

“Right, do you have time for a coffee?” Zayn asks, already searching for two clean mugs.

“Yeah, I guess, white two sugars please,” Liam sits down and watches Zayn make the drinks, his eyes never leaving him for a second.

“What will you say about where you’ve been?” Zayn is concerned, he doesn’t want a repeat of yesterday’s events. 

Liam shrugs,” Ellie’s...she’ll back me up if I buy her something nice.” 

Does Liam really think that’s ok? It doesn’t matter if Ellie is just with him for the money or if she actually likes him, he is using her for his purposes and Zayn can’t agree with that. He should say something but he doesn’t want to argue when they finally seem to be on friendlier terms.

“So what do you do when you’re not training?” He hands Liam his mug of white coffee, Zayn prefers his without anything. 

Liam takes a sip before answering,” Business College, my father wants me to work with him, I hate it.”

“Property isn’t it? Sounds like an alright opportunity to me,” Zayn throws in.

“Maybe so, but I don’t want to take advantage of people who are in financial difficulty and bully them into selling their assets below market value,” Liam sounds resentful. 

“Wow, you can certainly talk the talk, "Zayn is genuinely a little bit impressed," So what then if not business?"

A small smile plays on Liam's lips," My dream is to go to uni and study to be a social worker. I want to work with people like me, make a difference."

"You should go for it if you feel strong enough about it," Zayn tries not to sound too much like a 'know-it-all',"What's stopping you?"

" Nothing really, except my father won't support me doing it. He's threatening to kick me out if I quit the college. I'm not confident to go it alone. Where would I live? Ellie would leave me if I didn't have money," Liam sets the mug down on the table and looks at Zayn as if he could somehow provide him with a solution. 

"Jesus Liam, have you heard yourself? Is keeping up your pretend life more important than being happy? You're lying to yourself and everyone around you."

“I’m not lying to you now though, am I,” Liam picks his drink up again,” And anyway, what about you? Who or what is holding you back? I’m pretty sure you’re current position is not your dream job either. Is it that Louis guy?” He challenges.

Zayn bursts out laughing,” Oh god, not you as well, everyone thinks there’s something going on between Louis and I.”

“You do look very cosy together,” Liam says with a frown.

“Louis is my best mate and we are very close. He is one of the reasons I’m still here, he needs me, we need each other really… I don’t know, it’s complicated,” Zayn tries to justify himself.

“Exactly,” Liam smirks.

Damn, why does it feel like Liam just got the upper hand in this discussion? Why is it that every time he thinks he’s got Liam worked out it gets even more confusing? Plus there is that one question which has been eating away at him. 

“Can I ask you something Liam?” 

“Sure,” Liam looks at him expectantly. 

Zayn clears his throat,” Why were you always so nasty to me? I mean I sort of understand why you’re putting on this no homo show but I was never a threat to you, for all I knew you were the perfect example of a straight guy. You could have just ignored me and I would have never known.”

There is a long pause, Zayn already regrets asking but it’s too late now. Liam averts his eyes and blushes He seems to struggle with his reply, biting his lower lip repeatedly. Fuck if he doesn’t look absolutely adorable and hot at the same time. Zayn has to turn away since this train of thought is not helpful right now.

Eventually Liam begins to speak,” It's because I don’t know how to deal with this shit. Normally I would get myself off to porn or maybe a guy I’ve seen somewhere, nothing more. With you everything is different, you’re obviously gorgeous but that’s not it. I want to be near you, see you and hear your voice all the time. Honestly, I can’t stop thinking about you, I tried to make you hate me but you just keep being nice and I can’t deal with it, I wasn’t expecting these feelings, it’s all so fucked up…,” he breaks off.

Woah, Zayn has no idea what to say to that. This could literally be his wildest dreams come true if it wasn’t for the small matter of Liam’s denial of his sexuality. He is so deep in thought, that he fails to notice that Liam has scooted right next to him taking the mug out of his hand. He runs his fingers over the stubble on Zayn’s jaw and without further warning brushes his lips against Zayn’s. How the hell is this happening? Zayn’s brain goes momentarily blank, all he can focus on is Liam’s tongue gently pushing into his mouth while his thumb draws small circles on the soft skin under Zayn’s ear. Liam tastes like very sweet coffee and, well Liam. Time seems to be suspended, Zayn is sure that he has never been kissed like this before, he just wants to throw himself underneath Liam and let him do whatever he wants. It would be so easy to give in and go for it. 

“BAD IDEA,” shouts the voice of reason somewhere in his head. He tries to ignore it, taking in as much of Liam’s taste and smell as he can, committing it to memory in case it never happens again. 

“NO ZAYN, REALLY BAD IDEA.”

There it is again and this time he takes notice. Using every bit of resolve he can find, he slowly pulls away from Liam, leaving both of them gasping for breath. 

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have done that,” Liam apologises. 

“No,no, it’s just that I’ve been with a guy in the past who used me as a guinea pig, I got hurt badly. The way it is at the moment, all I can offer you is friendship,” Zayn gets up before the close proximity to Liam makes him do things he might regret later on. 

Liam nods, rubbing the back of his neck. He seems to be happier about this than Zayn imagined him to be.

"Really? We can be friends?," he smiles a broad smile, making his eyes crinkle around the edges," That's more than I hoped for...more than I deserve." 

Zayn's heart melts at that and he blames this fact for what he blurts out next," Now that we're friends, how about you come to a party tonight?" 

"With you?" Liam looks almost shocked. 

"Of course with me," Zayn informs him," It's Sophia's surprise birthday party, at the community centre behind the cinema. You like her, don't you?"

Yeah, she's a great girl," Liam confirms," She's the only one who speaks to me at the gym. I know it's her job but I do think we get on alright. Are the others gonna be there as well?" he asks, his tone unsure. 

"Yep, everyone will be there, but don't worry."

"Don't worry? Zayn, they all detest me. Won't it be social suicide for you to take me along? Not to mention actual suicide for me?" Liam has jumped up from the sofa, looking genuinely stressed. 

Zayn fights the impulse to draw him into his arms. 

'Shit Zayn, have you thought that through? You're taking him into the lion's den. How is that fair? So many people who understandably think he's an ass and you want to expose him to that?'

Zayn's inner monologue raises uncomfortable feelings inside him. This might possibly be his most ludicrous idea yet but he wants Liam there, to help Liam...obviously...but if he is honest with himself mostly for his own benefit. Telling Liam that he just wants to be friends was a big fat lie. He wants every piece of him, wants to look after him, love him, not to mention being fucked by him but Liam is not ready for that and the worst thing is that he might never be.

"They're just gonna have to like it, you’re with me and once they get to know you they will change their minds,” Zayn says quickly in his best reassuring voice.

“Ok I’ll go but only cause I'm flattered that you want me to,” Not looking at all convinced, Liam gets ready to leave,” Shall I pick you up? No point you taking a taxi, I’m definitely not drinking so I might as well drive,” he adds as an afterthought. 

“Yeah...um...I suppose that makes sense, I’ll see you about half seven then,” Zayn briefly touches Liam’s arm and closes the door behind him.

Asking himself again what the fuck he thinks he’s doing, Zayn goes on the hunt for a cigarette but as always when he desperately needs a smoke none can be found. His jacket produces an empty packet and even the drawer in his bedside table where his emergency supplies of everything should be, contains only lube, condoms and an out of date bag of crisps. Fine, if that’s how it is he’ll have to pop down to get some. 

Ed is already in the shop even though it’s not open yet. He is sorting the papers for delivery when Zayn knocks impatiently. 

“Come in, are you out of smokes?” Ed waves cheerfully and picks Zayn’s usuals off the shelf.

“You know me so well,” Zayn laughs,” Are you ready for tonight’s festivities? I’m really looking forward to your gig.”

“You bet, we’ve put an awesome set together, hopefully Sophia will like it,” Ed lifts the bundles of newspapers onto the counter for Zayn to put next to the door. 

“By the way who is the guy?”

“Zayn turns around,having stacked the papers neatly,” What guy?” he asks.

“The one that sneaked out of here two mornings in a row,” Ed grins suggestively.

“Oh him, he’s just a friend, “ Zayn says as casually as possible. 

“Yeah right, he is so your type and that car of his isn’t half bad either.”

“Do you know that spying on your tenants is illegal? In future please stay out of the areas of my life where you’re not invited,” Zayn snaps. God, his landlord can be so irritating when he wants to be.

“And that reaction right there tells me all I need to know,” The shopkeeper teases with a condescending pat on Zayn’s shoulder.

“Whatever Ed, put these on my tab,” Zayn doesn’t wish to be interrogated any longer so he grabs his cigarettes and returns to his flat. 

Finally being able to inhale the welcome smoke, he muses that his life has probably just gotten a hell of a lot more complicated and with that in mind he collects his stuff and sets off to check on Louis.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the day of the party has finally arrived. Hope you like it.

Zayn 

What to wear....what to wear? Zayn’s carpet is the perfect illustration of the term ‘floordrobe’. He has reached a new understanding of Jess’ and Katie’s never ending search for the right outfit. Zayn is by and large a casual dresser, choosing what feels good and happens to be clean, only today he just can’t decide. Niall’s instructions on attire were ‘whatever you’re comfortable in’. Zayn goes to the fridge to get himself another beer while he is waiting for a flash of inspiration. Maybe he shouldn’t be drinking before he even leaves the house but he is having trouble controlling his nerves, still dwelling on his fabulous plan to take Liam to the party and the small fact that he will actually be spending an entire evening with him, strictly as friends of course. Shuri seems to sense this, constantly roaming in his path and tripping him up between the heap of clothes and his bedroom window, which is the only one facing the road. No sign of Liam yet, what if he is not coming? No big deal right? Right. He looks at his phone again, re-reading the conversation with Liam. They agreed to go later than originally planned when most people would already be there. Every time he reads Liam’s name on the screen, his heart does a little dance. Smiling to himself he has another peek out the window, in time to see the car he has been waiting for pull up outside. Liam gets out, looking flawless in blue jeans and a black Henley. Zayn needs to get dressed quickly.

After all that consideration he has barely time to throw on his black, ripped jeans paired with a white tank top before Liam knocks and pops his head through the door.

“You ready?” he asks.

“Yep coming,” Zayn says whilst shoving his feet into his Doc Martin boots. He can’t see his jacket anywhere, so he puts his key, wallet and phone in his trouser pockets and follows Liam down the stairs.

The car looks every bit as gorgeous as he remembers and is filled with the heavenly scent of Liam’s cologne. Out of the corner of his eye Zayn can see that Liam is nervously chewing on his bottom lip. He is racking his brain for something encouraging to say but since nothing comes to mind he just smiles.

“We are doing the right thing here, aren’t we?” Liam asks about five minutes into their journey,” like you strolling in there with public enemy number one.”

“It’ll be fine, I designed the invitations and they clearly state ‘Feel free to bring a guest’, so I’m bringing a guest.”

“You have told them that I’m gonna be there, yes?”

Zayn looks out of the window, pretending he hasn’t heard the question.

“God Zayn, you’re just gonna spring this on them?”

“Listen Liam, there will be lots of people there who don’t even know who you are, besides Sophia will be pleased to have you there,” Zayn retorts.

‘And I will be too, he adds mentally, still trying to justify this move to himself without having to identify it as being very selfish.

“Sophia might be but that Niall dude certainly won’t,” Liam looks worried again,” does he realise that Sophia likes him a lot?”

Zayn is grateful for the change of topic until he messes it up with his next statement,” No, it’s an ongoing saga. He likes her as well and he also thinks that you’re trying to get it on with her,” he blurts out foolishly.

“Whaaaat?!!”, Liam exclaims, slamming his hands onto the steering wheel,” I’m turning back, you’re insane.”

“Too late, we’re here,” Zayn informs him,” stop worrying.

Liam parks the car in one of the last available spaces, mumbling something under his breath. He remains seated after the engine goes silent, turning to Zayn,”You’re not gonna tell them, are you...about me…?”

“It’s not my place to tell anyone, that’s up to you,” Zayn says, squeezing Liam’s arm reassuringly before stepping out of the car. Liam follows him reluctantly.

The community centre doesn’t look like much from the outside, on the inside however it’s quite roomy and well kept. Monotonous, thumping dance music greets them even before they open the door. It’s not Zayn’s type of jam, his ears are already hurting. When they enter the dimly lit building the party is in full flow, just like Zayn had hoped. Niall and Jess did a good job with the decorations. They’ve opted for a blue, white and silver theme with lots of balloons and pretty fairy lights everywhere. Small sofas and round tables are scattered around the room. There must be sixty or seventy people here, dancing, chatting or just milling around. On the far side of the dance floor is a long table with an amazing display of party food, courtesy of Harry who is clearly very good at what he does. Josh is waving from behind the bar, letting his hand fall down when he recognises Liam. Harry is trying to entertain a group of girls with some terrible but funny dance moves. In a corner Sophia is talking with people who must be her uni friends. Watching her from the little stage next to the bar is Niall whilst he is sorting the set list with Ed and his mates. Louis is nowhere to be seen. Zayn is contemplating whether or not to approach Niall and get it over with when the Irishman looks up and his previously cheerful expression changes to that of a raging bull. It only takes him a few seconds to reach the new arrivals.

“What the fuck is he doing here?” he barks, pointing accusingly in Liam’s direction.

“Pipe down Niall, he’s with me,” Zayn says.

“Don’t tell me to pipe down, Malik. I’ve organised this party and I don’t remember agreeing to him being here,” Niall is furious.

“I must have missed the part where you get to approve my choice of guest,” Zayn is getting annoyed now, with Niall mainly but also with himself. Maybe this is a mistake after all.

Niall steps forward, jabbing his finger into Zayn’s chest,”You know that I don’t want him here. Just because you think he’s a hot piece of ass doesn’t give you the right to subject everyone else to his presence.”

Zayn can feel Liam getting tense next to him. In an attempt to relax him he puts his hand on  
the small of Liam’s back, which earns him a disgusted glare from Niall, who is about to launch another tirade when a sharp voice stops him in his tracks.

“Is there a problem lads?” Louis asks, hands on his hips.

“You can say that again,” Niall huffs,” You need to have a word with your bff here about who  
does and who doesn’t qualify as a suitable guest at this party.”

Louis briefly lets his eyes rest on Liam before he addresses his best friend,” Are you sure about this?” he searches Zayn’s face.

“Yeah,” Zayn holds Louis’ gaze and moves a fraction closer to Liam.

Louis takes another moment to consider and then extends his hand towards Liam,” Hi, I’m Louis, I think we might have gotten off on the wrong foot.”

Liam shakes Louis’ hand, smiling his broad smile,” Hi Louis, I'm Liam. Nice to meet you properly."

Louis nods, turning to Niall,"Come on Nialler, let's check if the buffet needs topping up."

Niall looks positively outraged but lets himself be lead away.

“That was awkward,” Liam remarks, turning towards Zayn,” What do we do now?”

“You could sit at the bar, I’m due to take over from Josh,” Zayn suggests,”or maybe find Sophia? Sorry, I should have considered that I have to do a stint as a barkeeper.”

Liam is about to reply when Harry appears at his side,putting his hand on Liam’s shoulder” Hey, you are the infamous Liam Payne,right? I’m guessing you could do with laying low for a bit. Do you want to grab a drink?”

“Yeah, sure,” Liam looks a little pensive but accompanies him with a look back at Zayn, who nods reassuringly.

There are so many things that Zayn wants to ask Harry but he needs to go and he is actually really grateful to him that Liam won’t be on his own. The first thing he does behind the bar is open a beer, downing it pretty much in one go.

“You wanna slow down, Zaynie,” Louis has crept up behind him, wrapping his arms around Zayn’s middle,” The barman is not supposed to get pissed you know.”

“I’m not, I’m just a bit on edge,” Zayn confesses, opening another beer.

“I’ve noticed,” Louis pulls Zayn in tighter,” You’re doing it again, aren’t you.” It is more a statement than a question.

“Doing what?”

“Falling for a guy who can’t decide what he wants,”Louis points out.

“It’s not like that...we’re friends,” Zayn replies.

Louis lets go of him and swivels him around,” It’s me you’re talking to love, have you seen the way you two look at each other? You’re gonna get hurt again.”

Zayn starts to clear some glasses off the counter in order to avoid answering, instead he quickly changes the subject,” Have you talked to Harry about last night yet?”

“No,” Louis sighs,” but I spoke to Nick. He insists that Harry was drunk and trying to have sex with him, apparently nothing happened. Why is Harry doing this to me? I know he was sober, why is he punishing me like this?”

Zayn stops what he is doing,“Lou, do you really think Nick is telling the truth? Yesterday you said that he was all over Harry, you always ignore his shit behaviour. Shouldn’t you give Harry some credit and go talk to him?” Zayn gestures towards where Harry is sitting uncharacteristically on his own.

“This is neither the time nor the place…,” The rest of Louis’ answer gets lost as a load of guests arrive to order drinks. Louis shrugs , then proceeds to help Zayn who is mixing up orders, giving out incorrect change.

“I’ll do this, you’re tipsy,” He tells Zayn off in a loving tone, shoving him gently onto a stool.

Zayn can’t argue with that, his head is muddled and the room is starting to spin ever so slightly.

When the last person has been served, Louis walks out from behind the bar,” I’m gonna find Josh to relieve you of your duties. At this rate Niall will have to put a lot of money into the till to make up for your cock ups.”

“Ok,” Zayn agrees, trying to spot Liam among all the people but instead he sees Niall approaching. He doesn’t look any happier than he did earlier on.

“Malik, you and Louis should just go and get a room. Everyone here thinks that you’re fucking the boss anyway, which would explain why you get away with murder, no matter who you piss off in the process,” Niall sneers squaring up to Zayn.

“Nialler, come on, you know that’s not true. I’m sorry that I’ve upset you but Liam is not who you think he is,”Zayn clumbers off his stool and tries to embrace Niall who shrugs him off.

“You’re telling me that he’s not after Sophia? Look at them hugging over there. I should go over and punch his lights out.”

“I’d love to see you try,”Zayn mumbles to himself.

“What?? You don’t think I can take him?” The Irishman is shouting now.

Zayn is trying to work out if he means it. The last thing he needs is a physical fight. Why the fuck did he have to put two people who he cares about in this situation. To make matters worse, Liam must have noticed the commotion and is coming over, looking concerned.

“Everything alright, Zayn?”

“Yeah..,”is all Zayn can manage, thinking that he should do something.

“No, it’s not actually,”Niall charges towards Liam, raising his arm, ready to hit him,”Get your filthy hands off the girl I lo…like.”

Zayn is frantically searching for a way to intervene but his brain is too slow in processing the events. As it happens his panic is not necessary. Liam catches Niall’s fist in mid air, keeping him at arm’s length. Zayn is ashamed to admit to himself that this sight is turning him on rather too much, especially when he remembers when his own hands were in that grip. He rubs his face to rid himself of these totally inappropriate thoughts.

When he looks up he sees that Niall has lowered his arm (thank god) and Liam is talking to him in the calmest voice ever,” You need to wind your neck in and tell me what your problem is.”

“Apart from the fact that you’re arrogant and a bully, I don’t like the way you worm your way into Sophia’s life, wrecking her relationship... and don’t say you didn’t because I have proof,” With that Niall gets his phone out, searches for a second and shoves it into Liam’s face,”Read it out loud...maybe loverboy here will believe me then,” he snarls.

Liam gives him a surprised look but takes the phone and starts reading:

**Hi Niall**  
**Thanks so much for inviting me to Sophia’s party. Unfortunately we are no longer together so I didn’t think it would be right for me to go. We parted on good terms but she is in love with someone else. Thanks again for the invitation and I see you around. Pete**

“There you have it, I hope you’re happy. The decent thing for you to do would be to leave but I suppose ‘decent’ is not in your vocabulary,” Niall spits, snatching his phone back.

Liam runs his fingers through his hair, then he addresses Niall,”Ok, let me tell you something and if you still want me to leave afterwards, I’ll go.”

Zayn is following the proceedings with baited breath. What the fuck is he doing now? He’s not gonna say something stupid is he? Niall eyes Liam suspiciously, nodding his agreement.

Liam smiles a little,”You got it all wrong, Sophia is into another guy but it’s certainly not me. All she ever talks about is you, Niall this...Niall that, that’s all I hear. You need to make your move mate. I don’t know why you two have issues but trust me you are the one she wants.”

Niall's face is a sight .... his face is red and his mouth is open,at last he stutters?" But I thought..., but she said she wants...this makes no sense.... you better not be lying to me."

"I'm not lying, go and ask her to dance or something."

Zayn marvels at the way Liam just handled that, everyone is so so wrong about him. He feels like grabbing the dj's mic and announce to the world that Liam Payne is a good guy. Interrupting his thoughts is Josh who unceremoniously guides Zayn to the outside of the bar.

"Louis says you're drunk and I'm to take over. Not what I expected from you Malik. Also I just walked past Niall. He looks like he's come face to face with a ghost, did I miss something?" Josh asks, totally ignoring Liam.

"No, all's good," Zayn assures him," thanks for this, I owe you one."

Josh huffs and with a disapproving glance at Liam he starts to clear the counter of bottles and glasses.

What Zayn needs now above everything else is a cigarette.

“You coming for a smoke,Liam?” He asks while he’s looking around for his jacket until it dawns on him that he left it at home. Shit! “On second thought, let’s not, I forgot to bring any,”He resigns himself.

“I have one left, we can share,” Liam offers with a grin.

“You’re a lifesaver, let’s go outside,” Zayn takes Liam by the wrist and leads him through the backdoor. At the rear of the building is a small veranda with wooden decking which overlooks a small garden. Strategically placed lamps bathe it in soft lighting. As soon as the door closes behind them, the thumping of the music subsides considerably which is heaven for Zayn. The fresh air clears his head a little. Liam leans on the balustrade, reaching for his almost empty cigarette pack. When he lights up, the flame illuminates his face and Zayn finds himself staring. This friendship shit will be difficult to maintain.

“I can’t believe you’re a bit drunk and I’m not, makes a nice change,” Liam jokes holding out the cigarette to Zayn.

“I’m not fucking drunk, everyone needs to chill,” Zayn takes a deep drag, he wishes he wasn’t wearing just the tank top. It’s more chilly out here than he thought and he starts to shiver.

“Come here, you’re cold,” Liam puts his arms around Zayn’s shoulders, taking the cigarette from him.

Zayn should know better but he leans into Liam’s embrace anyway. Liam is just the right height for Zayn to put his head into the crook of his neck. They finish the smoke in companionable silence. The soft sound of Ed’s acoustic guitar filters through to them. Whether that or the numerous beers are to blame for Zayn’s sudden romantic mood is unclear but in any case he starts nuzzling Liam’s neck

“You know that this is not strictly friends behaviour, right?” Liam points out, at the same time pulling Zayn closer, tracing every tattoo on his arm with his thumb. Zayn can feel goosebumps erupting all over his skin which is completely unrelated to the temperature.

“Mmmm…,” is all he has as an answer.

“You know I meant it when I said that your ink is amazing. I always wanted to get a tattoo,” Liam says.

So now he wants to talk, when Zayn’s groin is reacting strongly to Liam’s touch? Fine!

“Why don’t you get one then?” He asks, when he would rather continue to nibble on Liam’s ear lobe.

“Father doesn’t like it, says it’s unprofessional. Besides if I get one, I want it to be special and nothing springs to mind at the moment.”

“Well, one day something will just jump out at you and then you can get it done. In the meantime, could you please kiss me?”Zayn breathes against Liam’s collarbone.

Liam lets out a low moan but moves to pull away a little.

“Zayn, you had a few drinks, you’re gonna regret this. You told me that you don’t want this,” He urges.

“Are you turning me down, Liam Payne?” Zayn closes the space again, tugging at Liam’s waist.

“Fuck Zayn, no...never,” Liam groans and picks him up, carrying him to a garden table in the corner of the veranda. He puts Zayn down on top of the table before sliding himself in between Zayn’s thighs and locking their lips together. The kiss is passionate and only ends when both of them are desperate for air. Liam slides his hands into Zayn’s tank through the arm holes, caressing his nipples. Turns out that this top was a genius idea after all. Zayn arches his back, his eyes closed. Liam could take him right here and now, he thinks to himself. The wooden table can probably support their weight, so ok it’s maybe a tad public but that only adds to the excitement as far as Zayn is concerned. Liam seems to have similar thoughts as he leans over Zayn, pinning his arms over his head. Liam whispering his name over and over drives Zayn mad. All he wants to do is surrender to his feelings completely but something is distracting him. The music appears to have stopped, muffled angry voices can be heard. One of those voices belongs to Louis, Zayn recognises it immediately and it makes him freeze.

Liam looks confused,” What is it? Am I doing something wrong? I thought…”His tone is thick with want.

“No...it’s Louis,” Zayn is torn between his desire for Liam and his need to find out what’s happening with his best friend. His muddled thoughts are interrupted by further angry shouting from within the venue. That’s it, Zayn disentangles himself from Liam, sliding off the table,” I’m sorry Liam...really...please, just give me a minute.”

Liam doesn’t answer, shaking his head in disbelief. With a last apologetic glance Zayn heads inside.

The scene that greets him doesn’t promise anything good. Everyone’s attention is focused on the two people standing at the edge of the dancefloor. Harry and Louis are facing each other, both looking absolutely furious.

Louis is gesticulating wildly,” You wanted to show me how irresistible you are? Well, you succeeded. I’ve upset you, I get it...but trying to sleep with my boyfriend?”

“That’s what you think happened?” Harry said with an icy voice,” He was ready to jump into bed with me, Louis. I wanted to make you see that he’s not worth your loyalty. The guy wants to own you, he’s effectively buying you when he subsidises your business. There are no traces of you in that house. Your needs don’t matter to him, he treats you like a glorified servant in front of his colleagues. Open your eyes,...please.”

Zayn is searching around the place for someone who could help but people are simply staring and possibly to a degree enjoying the show.

“At least I know where I am with him, I can’t be hanging around you knowing you’re still looking for the ‘one’ or whatever bullshit you were spewing. You need to grow up… like I said before, stop treating life like a fairytale and get a grip on reality,” Louis is screaming, his entire body shakes.

Can nobody see how distressed he is? Doesn’t anyone realise that he doesn’t mean a word he says when he acts like this? Zayn goes to hug Louis tightly, it’s all he can think to do.

Harry stands there nodding slowly,”Ok, in that case I’m done here,” He turns to leave, stopping briefly to address Zayn,” Look after him will you?"

“Tell him Louis, bloody tell him what you’ve told me,” Zayn urges.

“Tell me what?” Harry asks, looking straight at Louis.

“Nothing.. Zayn is getting things mixed up,” Louis snaps.

Harry leaves without saying anything else. Zayn feels that he should go after him, that his words sounded somehow final. Liam, who he didn’t even know was standing behind him, touches his arm, trying to get his attention.

“I’ve had a message from Ellie and the lads, they are getting suspicious. I should go and make an appearance, are you ok getting home?”

“Yeah..Liam listen… about earlier...I’m so sorry. Don’t go to meet them, please think about what you’re doing,” Zayn pleads.

“I think about that as soon as you think about what your relationship status with Louis actually is, I'll call you," Liam is speaking calmly but his words are hitting Zayn hard.

He has to watch helplessly as Liam walks away. He should have talked to Harry, he should have prevented Liam from going but he is just standing here with a trembling Louis in his arms. Dozens of people are staring at them, some with sympathetic, some with judgmental expressions.

“Right, let’s get back to the party, you lot look like you’ve never seen anyone squabbling before,” Niall shouts with as much cheerfulness as he can muster and the guests disperse,returning to their drinks and conversations.

“Thanks Nialler, are we good?” Zayn says, hoping for a positive response. He doesn’t think that he can take another confrontation.

Niall pats his shoulder, “Cause we are, I was a little out of order earlier, we can talk about it tomorrow. Get Louis home, I deal with things here.”

“Thanks bro,”Zayn is relieved.

“Thanks you two...Nick is away for the night, I’ll be alright,” Louis informs them, his voice faltering.

“No Louis, you’re coming with me and don’t even think about arguing,” Zayn guides Louis outside, wondering what the next day is going to bring. He feels a sense of trepidation thinking about it.


	12. Chapter 12

Zayn 

“Wakey, wakey, Zaynie.”

Zayn opens his eyes slowly, then closes them immediately as the sunlight hits him with a vengeance. It feels as if a herd of elephants has taken up residence in his head; also there is something crushing his legs. He carefully lifts his eyelids again and looks straight at Louis who is sitting on Zayn’s knees.

“Get off me, Lou, you weigh more than you think you do,” Zayn groans, trying to push his friend away.

“Time to rise and shine! Your shift starts in an hour, and you don’t look fit for purpose at the moment,” Louis quips, thankfully climbing off Zayn’s aching legs.

“I feel like shit,” Zayn complains, “so a little compassion wouldn’t go amiss. Make yourself useful and get me some coffee. There might be a lonely teabag left for you in the bottom cupboard.” Zayn pulls the duvet over his face in an attempt to gather his thoughts. If only he could recall everything clearly. What he does remember is that Liam said he would call. Zayn crawls out of his bed and grabs his phone off the floor. The screen informs him that Liam has neither rang nor messaged him. This fact causes a little stab in his chest, and he decides to take the initiative. He types:

**Hi Liam hope we can talk soon Z**

Normally he doesn’t grovel, but he feels a pang of guilt leaving Liam hanging like he did.

Louis returns to the room with a mug of steaming coffee which he puts next to Zayn on the bedside table. The tea bag must have been wishful thinking.

“Sorry about the tea, Lou, you wanna go and get some from Ed?”

“No, it’s okay, I’ll be leaving soon. I won’t be going to the office… Ought to be there when Nick arrives,” Louis says glumly.

Zayn doesn’t have the energy to ask how things are for him at home. “They’ll be gossipping about us at the gym, anyway,” he swerves.

“What do you mean?”

“One way or another, we both provided plenty of material yesterday. It’s astonishing what you find out when you bring out the hothead in Niall. Apparently lots of people are convinced that you and I are secretly an item,” Zayn smirks whilst getting dressed for work.

Louis sits down on the bed. “Maybe we should be. I mean, we’re obviously both gorgeous... I love you and you love me… Sexual chemistry is so overrated. I could move in with you even though your cat hates me, but I’m sure we can work something out… And if you want I can lift some dumbbells so I will look more like you know who. What do you think?” Louis asks, words tumbling from his mouth at an alarming rate.

Zayn knows that Louis only talks a mile a minute when he is stressed and emotional. Humouring him is usually the best way to handle that.

“I couldn’t live with your verbal diarrhoea every morning or with your limbs sprawled all over me—you have no regard for my personal bed space. Besides, no way am I gonna wear sheer button downs with floral print.”

“Bet you don’t say that to Liam.” Louis gives Zayn a light shove to the shoulder. “He looked angry, is everything alright?”

Zayn wishes he knew the answer to that question. “Dunno, when we went outside, things got kinda hot and heavy—until I heard you shouting inside.”

“Oh, shit, you didn’t… Did you?” Louis squeals.

“I did, but don’t worry, I’ll sort it. Has Harry been in touch?”

Louis’ face falls. “No, he has a class this afternoon—another reason for me not to go in. I think he needs some time to cool down.”

Zayn has the nagging feeling that it’s not going to be as easy as that. Harry looked and sounded pretty done. No time to think about that now, though. He scoops up his jacket, this time checking for his cigarettes, and walks over to hug Louis tightly. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?”

“Yeah. Come on, I’ll drop you off.” Louis clings to Zayn for a moment longer which is another indication of how worried he is.

On their way out, Zayn muses how easy things have always been between him and Louis. Shame it wasn’t like that with the significant men in their lives.

....

Halfway through Zayn’s shift, Jess rushes through the door looking worried. She runs her hand through her blond locks. “Oh, Zayn, I really don’t want to spring this on you, but I have nobody else to ask.”

“What’s the matter?” Zayn asks, coming up from underneath the counter where he has been sorting document files. It’s a slow day, and he is trying to distract himself from all the turmoil in his life by doing some tidying in reception.

Jess flops heavily onto a stool. “Charlie is poorly. I can’t leave her with my mum… It’s not fair, and I can’t bring her with me cause she keeps being sick. I don’t know what to do! The receptionist who usually covers for us is on holiday.”

Charlie is Jess’ three year old daughter. The father is no longer on the scene, making it very difficult for Jess to organise childcare. Zayn has babysat the little girl many times.

“Of course I can cover your shift, gives me a chance to go on a tidying spree. It’s long overdue,” he says, smiling.

“Brilliant, Zayn.” Jess lets out a relieved sigh. “You're a great guy. I'll take you out for a drink, promise."

Zayn goes to hug Jess. “Thanks for the compliment, but you don't need to do that. I'm happy to help," he says. “And now get back to Charlie, please. Where is she now?”

“I left her with my neighbour, but she is pregnant, and I don’t want her to catch whatever Charlie has.” Jess hurries out the door, almost colliding with incoming clients.

It’s probably not a bad thing to stay until closing time. He would otherwise only dwell on his and Louis’ situations. Going for a drink wouldn’t be an option either because his body is still suffering from the previous evening’s alcohol intake.

By the time he has sorted the files, wiped all the surfaces and re-stocked the snacks cabinet, he must have checked his phone about a dozen times. There were many messages but not from the person he was hoping for. He brings up Liam’s number and hovers over the call tab. Eventually he presses down with a nervous feeling in his stomach.

Liam is not answering, so clearly he doesn’t want to talk. It doesn’t make any sense—they are supposed to be friends. If anything, Zayn feels that he has more right to be angry since Liam most likely spent last night satisfying his sexual needs with HER. Zayn can’t shake the image of their naked bodies writhing between the sheets, and it makes him feel nauseous. Why the fuck is he not getting in touch? Is it too much to ask to answer the phone or reply to a message?

Growing agitated, Zayn decides to go out the back for a quick smoke. Maybe that will calm him down. Fuck Liam making him feel like he hasn’t in ages. One cigarette leads to another, but neither provides him with relief from the never ending circle of Liam-related thoughts. Everything was fine, they talked, they got on well, they were getting somewhere—why on earth is he doing this? Is it just because Zayn was concerned about Louis? They could have carried on where they left off, but no, Liam had to leave in a strop and shove his dick elsewhere. Zayn is refusing to acknowledge the hot jealousy that rages through his veins. He stubs out his cigarette quite violently and goes back inside.

The clients are grinding on his nerves. He doesn’t want to know about lost locker keys or empty shampoo bottles in the showers, he wants to know why he hasn’t heard from Liam. The end of the first shift can’t come fast enough—at least most of the people who come in later don’t want to chat with him and tell him their life story, they tend to just train and go.

Niall’s last group finishes at nine. He scrambles into reception, laden with his gym bag and multiple folders. Looks like he has been studying between sessions.

“Hey, Zayn, how’s your head? I was meaning to talk to you all day but didn’t get a chance.” He drops his belongings to the floor and sits himself down.

“I’ve been better,” Zayn admits.

“Listen, I wanted to apologise for being a douche last night...” Niall starts, before Zayn interrupts him.

“Never mind, Ni. It was a weird evening altogether and nothing untoward really happened.”

“No, let me finish,” Niall continues. “Liam doesn’t seem to be such a bad guy after all, as long as he’s not around those mates of his.”

“Forget it, Niall—he has. There is a lot about Liam that you don’t know,” Zayn tells him.

Niall nods, looking at the clock above the door. “Hey, why are you even still working? I thought you’d be gone by now.”

“Jess’ little girl is ill. I’m covering for her,” Zayn explains.

“You’re a good mate, Zayn.” Niall smiles. “How is the boss, by the way?

Zayn shakes his head. “He pretends to be okay, but I know he’s putting on a front. He hasn’t been in today… Trying to dodge Harry.”

“He needn’t have bothered. Hazza called in sick,” Niall informs him.

Zayn raises his eyebrows. “Has he now. Do you think it’s legit?”

“No idea, but I hope so. He looked pretty pissed off when he left the party.”

A real sense of dread takes hold of Zayn as he recalls Harry’s last words: ‘I’m done here’ and ‘Look after him.’

“Have you spoken to him at all?” he asks Niall.

“No, I was too busy today. I’ve sent him a text thanking him for his help with the party. Haven’t heard anything back, though.”

Shit. There is nothing that Zayn can do at this moment, he can only hope that Louis can sort something out when both him and Harry are in tomorrow.

To prevent total gloom descending on him, he changes the subject to something more pleasant. “Did Soph enjoy her party? She looked like she was having a good time.”

At the mention of Sophia’s name, a delighted grin lights up Niall’s entire face. “She loved it,” he says proudly. “Thankfully she missed most of the drama, and thanks to Liam we are friends again, had a long chat about all sorts of things.”

“Have you told her that you’re in love with her?” Zayn props his elbows on the counter, resting his head in his hands.

Niall’s face turns a deep shade of red. ”What?! I don’t—”

“Cut the crap, Nialler, we all know what’s up. So?” Zayn probes.

“We haven’t discussed anything to do with feelings. I’m just glad that we’re friends again, and… She wants to talk to me tomorrow. Apparently we will be going on a long walk, which makes me incredibly nervous.”

“Sounds promising to me, usually she bites your head off. This is a step is the right direction. Don’t mess it up this time,” Zayn teases. He is genuinely happy that things are looking up for at least one of them.

“You’ll be the first to know, mate.” Niall picks up his stuff and leaves with a last cheeky grin towards Zayn.

 

.....

 

An hour before closing time, Liam strolls in. With a noncommittal 'Hi, Zayn' he makes his way through to the changing rooms.

Hi, Zayn?? Is he fucking serious? Zayn has a good mind to go after him right now, but he needs to deal with customers, so that will have to wait. The hands of the clock move at snail's pace until finally the last client leaves and he can lock the entrance door. After another ten minutes of contemplating the pros and cons of challenging Liam, his anger wins.

Liam is in the fitness suite, running on a treadmill. Against his better judgment, Zayn admires him for a moment before approaching him. Liam looks at him briefly then continues to run. Zayn’s remaining smidgen of patience dies. He launches forward and hits the red ‘Stop’ button on the exercise machine.

“What are you doing that for? I want to train,” Liam says accusingly, as the running belt comes to a halt.

“And I want to talk to you,” Zayn barks.

“So talk… It must be important for you to come barging in here like this.” Liam has reverted back to the snarky tone from their early encounters.

“You don’t call; you don’t answer my text; you don’t answer your phone. Anything you wanna tell me?” Zayn asks.

Liam hops off the treadmill, wiping the sweat from his face with a towel. He slowly opens a bottle of water and emphasises every gulp he takes. It kind of reminds Zayn of those Diet Coke adverts where a bunch of women drool over a guy who is mowing the lawn. When Liam puts down his drink he turns to face Zayn.

“I don’t want to argue,” is all he says.

“No, you just want to mess me around with as few consequences for yourself as possible. You’re blanking me, I thought we were friends,” Zayn huffs.

Liam takes a couple of steps towards Zayn and says with an infuriatingly calm voice. “I was ready just to be friends if it meant I could be near you. It was you who crossed the line. You got drunk and then you wanted me—but not as much as you wanted Louis.”

Zayn can only stare at him. That’s not what happened, was it?

“Why do you have to bring Louis into it?” he asks, suppressing the thought that Liam could possibly be a little bit right.

“Cause he is the reason you’re stuck in this dead end job, living in a poxy flat above a shop... And you are alone. I wondered why, but now I know. You can’t be with anyone because there would always be three people in that relationship. If you and him are not screwing, then I don’t know what sort of co-dependency shit is going on between you.”

“Are you done?” Zayn refuses to process Liam’s words. He is angrier than he has been in years, and Liam’s nonchalance stokes the rage in him even further.

“Just telling you some home truths.” Liam takes off his vest and walks over to where he left his bag on top of some yoga mats.

“Fine, if we’re playing the truth game… What about these?” Zayn follows him until he can feel the heat radiating off his body, digging his index finger into Liam’s chest. “These are fresh marks. Your father abuses you mentally and physically, and you let it happen because you don’t have the guts to make it on your own.”

Zayn can’t really believe that these dickhead statements are coming out of his mouth.

Liam looks like he has been punched. “Don’t you think I know that?” he asks quietly. “My father is not well, and I don’t have to explain myself to you.”

Zayn is just not able to stop himself. “That’s it, isn’t it? You won’t accept responsibility for anything you do. Hanging around with racist and homophobic assholes, insulting me whenever you feel like it, having a girlfriend but at the same time wanting me to be your dirty little secret… But because you’re a victim it’s all okay.”

Liam clenches his fists and Zayn can see the throbbing veins in his neck.

“Shut the fuck up, Zayn. You know that I want you like crazy.” Liam’s eyes bore into Zayn’s: he is livid.

Zayn holds his stare. “Oh, yes? Is that why you run and fuck someone else as soon as things don’t go your way?”

“You need to come down from your moral high horse. Everything is always on your terms, you make the rules and you constantly change the goal posts. You work me up, and then when your beloved Louis calls, you drop me just like that.”

“Oh, stop wallowing in your self pity.” Zayn is furious and loses his cool altogether. He shoves Liam in the chest. The push must catch him off guard because he stumbles, landing flat on his back on the mats. He glances up at Zayn, looking rather confused and vulnerable. His gym shorts have slumped to below his hip bones. Zayn lowers himself on top of him, crushing their lips together. After a moment of shock, Liam responds with venom.

When their bruised mouths separate, Zayn hisses. “So you think I owe you something, do you?”

He doesn’t wait for an answer. His lips move down Liam’s neck and chest, leaving red and purple marks wherever he goes. Zayn’s dick pulsates in his jeans, but he pays no attention to it. He rolls off Liam and pulls the shorts around his ankles. Liam lets his legs fall apart willingly, inviting Zayn in. Without thinking, Zayn starts licking Liam’s slit, working his way down to his balls. Liam breathes heavily, his fingers trying in vain to get a grip on the mat’s surface. His strangled moans are so hot, but Zayn is determined to be the one in charge this time.

“Please…” Liam whines, grabbing a fistful of Zayn’s hair, but he has other plans. Sliding down even further he spreads Liam’s cheeks with one hand whilst stroking Liam’s dick with the other. He tentatively licks around Liam’s hole, causing him to thrash his arms around, gasping. When he thinks Liam can’t take his teasing anymore, he enters him with his tongue, licking in and out at the same pace that he pumps Liam’s dick. Liam goes wild, practically pushing himself onto Zayn’s tongue, soon coming with a long guttural groan.

Zayn pulls out slowly and rests his face against Liam’s inner thigh until he comes down from his high. As soon as Liam’s breathing evens out, Zayn jumps up and walks out without a backward glance.

A sick feeling settles in the pit of his stomach after the anger and the subsequent adrenaline rush subside. What did he do? A huge sense of shame washes over him. Okay, Liam gave as good as he got, but that was a piss poor excuse for Zayn to lay into him like that. He closes his eyes for a second, trying to deal with the realisation that his emerging feelings for Liam go way beyond simple physical attraction.

There are a number of jobs that he should be doing, like sorting the locker room and putting the towels into the washing machine. As it is, he barely makes it to the door to unlock it before slowly sinking into his chair.

He isn’t sure how much time passes until Liam comes out and stands in front of his desk.

“We are destroying each other. I’m going to join another gym. Can you square it with Louis?” Liam’s face resembles a mask, his eyes unreadable.

Zayn wants to scream, wants to embrace Liam and never let go, but he is incapable of moving.

“Yeah…” he whispers, barely audible.

Liam might have said something else if Ellie didn’t stick her head through the door just then.

“Baby, are you coming? The guys are waiting in the car. Or are you making friends with the little faggott?”

Liam hesitates briefly, then spits, “No, why would I?” He slams the door on his way out.

The panicky sensation of not being able to breathe grips Zayn as hot tears trickle down his face. Everything that Liam has said to him comes flooding back, and when it’s all laid bare like that, Zayn can’t pretend any longer that it’s not true. His life is pitiful.

Some time after the panic is replaced by numbness, Zayn gets his phone out. His first instinct is to get in touch with Louis, but instead he goes into his mail box, opening the recent email from a London-based comic book publisher.

 

**_Hi, Zayn!_ **

**_I am sorry to hear that you will not be joining us at this time. We were more than impressed with your portfolio, and I would like to extend an open invitation to you should your circumstances change in the future._ **

**_Best Wishes,  
Caroline_ **

 

Zayn stares at the words for a bit and then he starts to type.

 

**_Hi, Caroline._ **

**_I'm writing to ask if the offer still stands. If it is okay with you, I would like to pop down for a chat. Looking forward to meeting you._ **

**_Zayn_ **

 

He presses ‘send’ before he can change his mind. Maybe something positive could come out of this mess after all.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At long last I'm able to update. Thanks so much for sticking around xx

Louis 

After five cups of tea and numerous cigarette breaks, the staff rota doesn’t look any more complete than when Louis first opened the document two hours earlier. He switches off his monitor, promising himself that he will get back to it later on. It seems to be quiet out in the gym and Louis’ eyes wander to the huge planner on the office wall which shows that Harry should be teaching his Zumba class about now.

The past couple of days have been dragging terribly for him. Harry is still off sick and hasn’t responded to his calls. Louis has been trying to tell himself that it’s not Harry’s voice that he hears everywhere, that he is not deeply disappointed every time he passes the dance studio only to find Katie running Harry’s class, that it’s not Harry’s touch that he yearns for when he wakes in the middle of the night - No, that’s not what’s happening - it simply can’t be. Louis needs to convince himself that he and Harry are not compatible. Harry is a dreamer and Louis must keep his feet firmly on the ground.

Nick said as much this morning. He has actually been rather attentive since that fateful dinner party, assuring Louis that he would very much like for the two of them to be closer again. Holiday brochures, in which the most romantic destinations have been marked with post it notes, have been placed where Louis was guaranteed to find them.

Louis is closing his eyes, trying to get a handle on what his feelings are exactly. Someone in the corridor laughs loudly, and the thumping sounds from the zumba group reach Louis’ ears every time the studio door opens. It is just normal life out there, how it has always been. If Nick seriously wants them to make another go of it, would that be such a bad thing? Does it really matter that his heart isn’t fluttering in Nick’s presence, that he isn’t desperate for his touch? Isn’t the knowledge that Nick cares about him enough? Should he be craving the very things that he mocks Harry for?

Since it appears that nothing useful is getting accomplished and Louis’ thoughts are just running around in circles, he pushes his chair back, squaring his shoulders. He should have a look what’s happening outside of his office; neglecting his duties isn’t going to help with his internal turmoil.

Passing the studio he briefly hopes against hope that Harry might be there, but of course it is Katie’s voice which shouts out the instructions.

At reception, Zayn is bent over the computer keyboard, chewing on the top of his pen. Niall is leaning on the counter seemingly staring into space with an expression that he usually only sports after a large number of alcoholic drinks. Assuming that he hasn’t been boozing on the job, there must be another reason for his glazed eyes, and Louis is willing to bet that it has something to do with Sophia.

“What’s new with you and Soph? That’s what your distant look is all about, isn’t it?” Louis lowers himself onto the stool next to Niall’s.  
“Is it that obvious?” Niall asks, grinning from ear to ear. “I was trying to talk to Zayn, but he is on a whole different planet.

Louis glances at Zayn, who doesn’t seem to be taking any notice of the conversation.

Zayn has been quiet and withdrawn lately, but Louis can’t get him to talk about it. It has definitely something to do with the e-mail Louis received from Liam, requesting to be released from his contract, but Zayn refuses to elaborate. Niall is obviously bursting with news so Louis puts his concerns about Zayn aside and gives Niall his full attention.

“Remember that she wanted to talk? Well, we went to Tynemouth and walked along the seafront. She looked fantastic in that green dress - you know the one with the floaty skirt?” Niall gushes, making wavy hand movements.

Louis can only muster a blank expression, and Zayn grunts something unintelligible from behind the reception desk.

“She had her hair in a braid - I love when she wears it like that. Anyway, we had fish and chips at that little place by the yacht club and--”

“Niall, I know the details are important, however I believe you were gonna tell us what she actually said?” Louis prompts with an amused smile.

After a pause, presumably for dramatic effect, Niall finally gets to the point. “She likes me, can you believe it lads? She really likes me.” Niall’s voice rises to a little squeak.

“That’s hardly breaking news, is it?” Zayn mumbles, still leaning over his keyboard.

Niall seems to be on too much of a high to take offence.

”No, but she never said that to me before, and the only reason why she always had a go is that she didn’t want to be heartbroken when I return back home. She said that she genuinely tried with Pete, but she couldn’t get me off her mind. They ended it amicably, which also means that your Liam was telling the truth,” he addresses Zayn, whose head snaps up at the mention of Liam’s name.

“And that surprises you, does it? Why would you think that he was lying to you, Niall? He is not a liar, and for your information, neither is he MY Liam,” Zayn barks.

A diversion is clearly needed so Louis pulls Niall into a brotherly hug. “That’s amazing news, what are your plans? Are you properly together now?”

“I hope we will be,” Niall’s smile grows even wider. “We’ve decided to start again from the beginning and date like normal people. We’ll see where that will take us.”

“We’re over the moon for you, aren’t we, Zayn?” Louis says with an imploring look in Zayn’s direction.

“Yes...sure… Sorry, Niall, bad day,” Zayn says, smiling weakly.

“Right, I’ve got to get back to the rota. Zayn can you join me please?” Louis turns to leave.

“Nah, I’m just finishing this,” Zayn says, staring at the computer screen where it is clear for all to see that he hasn’t done any work whatsoever.

“That wasn’t a suggestion, Zayn. I’m telling you as your employer to come to my office - NOW.”

Louis doesn’t hang around for an answer. Walking down the corridor, he can sense Zayn behind him, probably making rude gestures at his expense.

As soon as the door closes behind them, he takes Zayn by the shoulders, giving him a gentle shake. “What the fuck is going on, Zaynie? You’ve been acting weirdly for days now. I’ve had a message from Liam, telling me that he’s moving to another gym. What happened, and why are you not talking to me?”

Zayn takes Louis’ hands off his shoulders and moves over to the window.

“You have enough on your plate with the Harry and Nick situation. It didn’t seem fair to burden you with my crap as well,” Zayn says quietly.

Louis guides Zayn to a chair and sits himself down on the table in front of him.

“That’s not who we are though, Zaynie. Just tell me what’s on your mind. I can see that you’re suffering,” he says in a soft voice.

Zayn looks so dejected, and Louis is asking himself once again why he hasn’t put in more effort to sit him down for a talk before now. The ability to discuss absolutely anything has always made their friendship special.

Zayn shifts in his chair, clearing his throat. He is obviously trying to decide how much information he should disclose. Louis hopes with all his heart that he trusts him enough to share whatever is bothering him so much.

Finally Zayn begins to speak and doesn’t stop until he has told Louis everything… About Liam’s problems, the heated argument that they had, and the revenge sex. Even though Louis wants to interrupt many times, he thinks it best to let Zayn get it off his chest uninterrupted.

When Zayn falls silent, Louis runs his hand through his hair, letting out a heavy breath. “Wow, that must be hard for him to live with. Poor lad… I mean if you can’t even rely on your family to love you, what chance do you have? What I don’t understand is why you are beating yourself up so much over this. It sounds to me as if he gave as good as he got, and he didn’t object to your advances, did he?”

Zayn shakes his head slowly. “No, I’m positive he was up for it, but it still felt wrong...so sleazy. Only minutes earlier, I accused him of playing the victim. How shitty of me was that. And you know what else? Everything he said to me is true. When he spelt it out to me, I realised just how much of a failure I am.”

Enough of this self-loathing; Zayn doesn’t deserve to feel like this. Louis slides off the table into Zayn’s lap, cradling his friend soothingly.

“Babe, you and I both know that you’re only still here because you worry about me, and I love you for that.”

Zayn looks up at Louis with sad eyes. “There’s something else I need to tell you… I just don’t know how.”

Louis feels anxiety creeping up on him. He is pretty sure that he doesn’t want to hear Zayn’s news, but he encourages him anyway.

“Out with it - come on.”

Zayn carefully pushes Louis away from him and stands up. “I have accepted a job at one of the places that keep contacting me. I asked them for an interview, but they offered me the position outright.”

This is the conversation Louis has been dreading ever since Zayn started working for him. Of course he wants him to fulfil his potential and use his talents, but the thought of him leaving the gym for good hurts a lot.

“Where is it?” he manages to ask.

Zayn is looking at the floor, hunching his shoulders. “In London… I start in four weeks,” he informs him.

Louis takes a deep breath and goes to embrace Zayn. “I’m happy for you, love, it’s not that you’re gonna fall off the face of the earth. Between Skype, FaceTime and physical visits, we should be just fine,” he says with more conviction than he feels.

He is about to add some more comforting words when the door bursts open and Niall barges in, frantically waving his phone around.

“Guys, it’s Harry…”

Taking in the alarmed expression on Louis and Zayn’s faces he quickly adds, “Don’t worry, he’s okay, but he sent me a text… Oh, man.”

“Just read it out, Niall,” Louis shouts hysterically.

Niall scrambles to find the message, almost dropping the phone. With a worried look at his friends he reads:

**_Hi Niall_ **

**_I’m sorry to drop this on you like this. When you read this message I will have already left town. I don’t want to get into the ins and outs of it but I can’t stay in Newcastle any longer. I have asked uni for a transfer and I’ve cleared out my accommodation. The gym kit that you’ve lent me is with Josh. Thanks for being a good friend. I will change my number after this message but I’m sure I will get in touch sometime in the future. Say ‘Hi’ to everyone and good luck for Ireland._ **

**_See you later mate_ **

**_H x_ **

**_PS: Please tell Louis that I have found ‘The One’ which is why I can’t hang around._ **

A wave of nausea washes over Louis, causing his legs to go weak. Thankfully Zayn has moved next to him, holding him close.

This must be the single worst day of his life. Harry is gone!! The love of his life has just disappeared without giving him a chance to make amends, and his best friend and soulmate is moving many miles away from him.

“Go and get Louis a drink, Niall, something with alcohol preferably,” Zayn urges.

“No, just go, both of you… Just leave me, please,” Louis pleads before Niall can do anything.

“But Louis, you’re in no fit state--” Zayn starts.

“Leave… LEAVE,” Louis screams, pushing the other men out of the office.

He slams the door shut and collapses into a heap onto the floor, crying uncontrollably.

.....

The previous evening and night are mostly a blur. Louis didn’t eat or sleep at all, instead he stayed up talking to Nick who provided him with endless mugs of tea (which he still doesn’t know how to make). Louis would have thought that his boyfriend would be the last person he would want to talk to after the disastrous news from yesterday, but he has come to the conclusion that Nick is actually the only constant in his turbulent life.

With Harry gone and Zayn and Niall on their way to new careers, Nick is who remains. Louis has talked to him about everything that has happened, and he took it better than Louis could have wished for. The only part he left out is the trip to the meadow. He needs to keep that memory safely locked inside his heart since he doesn’t anticipate that he will ever feel that happy again. Nick seemed to understand, calling Louis’ time with Harry an infatuation that can happen to anyone, asking him to forget about it and to commit himself to the relationship he is actually in. Louis wanted to protest, wanted to say he loves Harry and probably always will, but what would have been the point. Harry left, and that's it.

Louis figures that at twenty-three he should not be the wreck that he is because someone has moved on from him. A glance into the mirror reveals that his face resembles a mask. He feels cold and numb inside, but this time he is going to succeed in putting Harry behind him. Harry, who has proven Louis right after all. Love is a fantasy created for films and novels. In reality, it counts for nothing. Harry has shown him that by moving on so swiftly and effortlessly.

The cardboard box in front of Louis contains his collection of classic books as well as his signed and framed Doncaster Rovers football jersey. There won’t be any room in his life for those silly, sentimental things anymore.

He seals the top when Zayn enters with a mug of steaming tea.

“Louis, can I come in?” he asks hesitantly, holding out the hot drink.

Louis opens the door for Zayn, who looks worried.

“Are you okay? Is there anything I can do for you? You look terrible,” Zayn blurts out.

“Thanks a lot, and yes, there are a couple of things you can do, as it happens,” Louis attempts a smile, but judging by the pity displayed on Zayn’s face, he failed.

“Anything, Lou… Anything you want.”

“Firstly, we should probably start looking to fill the upcoming vacancies. I want to have enough time to pick the right people. If you could advertise for a swimming instructor, a receptionist, and a personal trainer just in case Sophia goes with Niall,” Louis says, sipping his tea.

“You want me to include an advert for--”

“No.” Louis interrupts Zayn quickly. “I don’t need another Zumba instructor, Katie will take the classes on permanently. She has been doing an excellent job since...you know.”

“I can alter my plans; I can stay. There will be other jobs,” Zayn says emphatically, reaching for his friend’s hand.

Louis gives it a little squeeze. “You will do no such thing. You will go to London and do me proud.”

Zayn nods. “What’s with the box?” he asks, eyeing the large object curiously.

“Could you get rid of it for me, please? My books are in there.”

“You love those books. Do you want me to put them in the storeroom for now?” Zayn asks, clearly puzzled by Louis’ request.

“I said get rid of them. Why are you always questioning everything I ask you to do? You are seriously the most obstinate employee in existence,” Louis scoffs and play punches Zayn in the arm.

“Ok, I’ll get on it,” Zayn says, resigning himself to the chore. “Is there anything else, boss?” he adds sarcastically.

Louis ignores the jibe. “Yeah, one more thing: I want to call a full staff meeting at four.”

Zayn’s smirk turns into an alarmed expression. “What is it about? What do I tell them?”

“You tell them nothing. Just make it clear that I would like as many of them as possible to attend.” Louis is trying to sound confident, but he is under no illusion that Zayn is going to buy the act.

“Fine.” Zayn shoves the box through the door with his foot and slams the door behind him.

Louis regrets not being able to tell Zayn his plans, but he isn’t mentally prepared himself yet.

Just after four o’clock, Louis walks into the dance studio where his employees are chatting noisily amongst themselves. Nearly all of them are present, which confirms to him how loyal his workforce is, and that his efforts to keep the gym running are justified. When they see him, they fall silent, anxiously following his every move.

Louis stands in front of the group with his hands folded behind his back. His heart is hammering hard in his chest. This is it…

This is the moment when he takes back control over his life.

“Thank you all for coming at such short notice. I am sorry if I worried you, but I know how the rumour mill in this place works, which is why I want to address you myself. Firstly, I would like to congratulate Zayn on his new job where he will finally be able to put his substantial talent as an artist into practise.”

A number of staff members seem to be very surprised by this development. The chatter about Louis and Zayn’s supposed affair must have reached absolutely everyone. If only they were true and things might have turned out differently.

After a round of applause for Zayn, Louis carries on. “Also, we will shortly have to say goodbye to Niall, when he goes back to Ireland and a glittering career. I’m sure you will agree that he will be sorely missed.”

Niall blushes a little bit, whilst Sophia giggles into his shoulder. They do make a lovely couple.

Louis waits until the second wave of clapping hands dies down before he continues his speech.

“One more thing before you go. After living together for quite a while, my partner Nick and I have decided to make our relationship more permanent. We also don’t want to wait a long time and will be tying the knot in ten days time. I would like to invite you all to our engagement party, which will be held at the Kingswood Manor Country Club.”

The silence in the room that follows Louis’ speech is deafening. Every single person looks at him at best in confusion, at worst in absolute horror. He wishes there was a way to explain to them why he is taking this step, but if he tried he would break down, and he doesn’t think he could stand the humiliation. Niall and Zayn are exchanging knowing glances, probably hoping that they can change his mind. They mean well but will just have to get used to it, and anyway - they are leaving him.

He straightens his back, and with a final nod to his friends and colleagues he returns to the sanctuary of his office.


	14. Chapter 14

Zayn 

“What are we gonna do? He won’t listen to me but you can get him to see sense,” Niall has his hands pressed to either side of his head. He looks genuinely distressed and Zayn knows exactly how he feels. 

“He will not listen to anyone when he’s like this. Did you see his face? It was vacant, totally emotionless,” Zayn says, chewing on the edge of his thumb and pacing up and down outside Louis’ door,” Do you have any idea where Harry might be?”

Niall was all for going in to confront Louis head on but Zayn convinced him that this would only make him dig his heels in even more.”

“I dunno...he never talked about that, shit man we didn’t discuss where we would go in a life crisis - we hung out and had a laugh. If I had to guess, I’d say he would go home. He seems to be close to his mum, don’t quote me on that though.” Niall looks like he is digging deep within himself to find some answers.

“And that would be where?” Zayn demands impatiently.

“Fuck if I remember...it was some quaint place in Cheshire,” Niall answers Zayn’s questioning look with a shrug of his shoulders.

Zayn throws his hands into the air, returning to the reception desk. There must be some way to locate Harry. Zayn is certain if he could only get Harry and Louis to talk, there might be a chance for them. 

Niall interrupts his thoughts,” I got it - wait here, I need to get my laptop,” he says with a jubilant ‘whoop’ before rushing out to his car. Moments later he returns out of breath but with a hopeful expression. 

“Let’s have a look at this.” He places the computer on the counter and starts searching frantically for whatever it is he wants to show Zayn. 

“What are you looking for?” Zayn asks, peering over Niall’s shoulder.

“A little while back, Harry and I had a few drinks and started to mess around on Google Earth to see if we can see people in our town. The info should still be in the search history...and...yep, here it is. He is from Holmes Chapel,” Niall announces proudly. 

Zayn squeezes him briefly,” Thanks Niall, I owe you one.”

“No probs mate. I just hope that you can get something sorted. Do you want me to cover your shift tonight? I don’t have any classes.”

“Oh would you? That would be awesome and since you’re doing me favours, could you drop that box from the hallway off at Ed’s? Some of Louis’ stuff is in there. It is too heavy for me to take on the bus,” Zayn says with a lopsided grin.

“You’re milking the situation Malik. What exactly did your last servant die of? But because this is for a good cause, I’m gonna agree,” Niall says with mock outrage,” and now go and find that curly-haired shit and tell him that I will kill him personally when he gets here.”

“Where did I find a friend like you, Nialler?” Zayn kisses Niall on his immaculately quiffed hair and heads for home.

.....

As soon as he enters his flat Zayn goes to look for his sports bag and throws in everything he might need for a few days. It’s going to be tricky not to tell Louis where he is going. If he says he is ill, Louis will come running and if he says he needs some time off, he will be suspicious. Zayn is just going to go ahead with it and worry about the consequences later. Ideally Niall will keep his mouth shut. Shuri looks at him with that ‘I wasn’t expecting you’ face that she puts on when she feels disturbed. 

Zayn picks her up for a quick cuddle,” I have to go away for a little while so you can have the bed all to yourself. You’ll like that won’t you?”

Shuri gives him a noncommittal ‘mew’ which he takes as confirmation. Before he forgets, he sends a message to Ed, asking him to feed the cat. Ed texts back straight away and wants to know what the plan is. 

That’s a great question...If only Zayn knew the answer to that himself. He is going to a place where Harry may or may not be and if by some miracle he finds him, there is always the possibility that Harry won’t speak to him and even if he does, he might not want to accompany him back to Newcastle. This really is a crap plan the more Zayn thinks about it, but he can’t see any other way to try and prevent Louis from making the biggest mistake of his life. 

Zayn checks absent mindedly if he has packed the essentials when a small knock on the door cuts into his thoughts. Why can his landlord never keep his nose out of things that have nothing to do with him? 

“Come in Ed, door is open.”

“It’s me ...Liam,” says a familiar voice from outside of the door.

Zayn stops abruptly what he is doing, trying to control his suddenly painful heartbeat. When he thinks he can trust his voice, he says as casual as possible,” What do you want,Liam? I’m about to go out. We’re finished - remember?”

Instead of an answer, Liam walks into the room and Zayn feels like he is unable to breathe. It’s one thing seeing Liam when you expect him but being faced with him totally out of the blue is a lot for Zayn to handle. 

“I’m here to help you. Let me drive you to Cheshire,” Liam says, stepping further towards Zayn. There he goes again with his need to invade people’s space. 

“I don’t want your help. How do you even know that I’m doing this?” Zayn has lost all track of what he has and hasn’t put into his bag. 

“That’s not important now. If you could maybe stop being such a stubborn tit and look at the practicalities, you would see that it makes sense. With a bit of luck I can get you and Harry back here tonight. On the train it will take you forever and I thought time is of the essence. You can hate me all you want but don’t deny me the chance to help those guys. They’ve accepted me and this is the least I can do,” Liam pleads with a look on his face that doesn’t do anything to calm Zayn’s stuttering heart. 

He actually thinks Zayn hates him? Nothing could be further from the truth, it’s almost laughable. Unfortunately Liam does have a valid point though, so with a sigh that is drenched in resignation he motions to the door.

“Fine, let’s go then...but I’m warning you - I’m not in the mood to talk about us and whatever it was that we had. I don’t hate you, why would you say that? I just have enough to worry about at the moment with Louis doing his best to fuck up his life. I can’t be concerning myself with analyzing the feelings I may have for you.”

Liam smirks,” Oh, I’m well aware that Louis is your number one priority.”

“Change the record Liam, if you want to start that again you can piss off right now.” 

Zayn throws his bag over his shoulder and barges past Liam, down the stairs and onto the street where Liam’s car is parked outside the shop. 

Liam is behind him, jangling his keys,” Are you getting in then?”

Zayn huffs, climbing into the passenger seat but says nothing. The smell inside the car brings memories flooding back for Zayn - the first time he sat in this seat, soaking wet after Liam saved his ass from those imbeciles he hangs around with and the second time when they were on their way to the party and Zayn couldn’t believe his luck that he was able to walk into the venue with Liam by his side. Thinking about that evening highlights again how selfish it was of Zayn to drag Liam along. And perhaps now he is paying the price...The silence hangs heavily between them and considering how long the journey to Holmes Chapel will be, Zayn decides to be civil and start a conversation.

“You were going to tell me how you know what’s going on with Louis,” he says hesitantly, trying to ignore the heat that rises in his stomach as he looks at Liam’s profile. 

“Sophia told me,” Liam says as if it is the most normal thing.

Zayn shifts his body onto his right side to face Liam fully,” You’re in touch with Sophia? Wow, I didn’t see that one coming.”

“Sophia trains me in her spare time. We go to that clearing at the back of the town park,” Liam explains, keeping his eyes firmly on the road. 

“Couldn’t you find a suitable trainer at your new gym? Why are you doing back to basics training when you wanted an ‘all singing all dancing’ facility before?” Zayn has trouble wrapping his head around this information.”

“I never said that - If you had been paying attention, you would know that other people made that comment,” Liam spits.

‘Yeah, other people like you girlfriend’, Zayn can just about stop himself from saying that thought out loud. 

After another half an hour of intense staring out of the window by both of them, Zayn breaks the deadlock.

“How are things with you? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.” 

Liam waits for a short moment then he answers, his tone strained,” It’s ok. Father hasn't been too bad. He’s planning to introduce me fully into the company in a couple of months time. I think he said something about a move to somewhere in Scotland as well.”

“Have you thought that through? I mean… I'm not criticising… just please be careful.”

Zayn actually wants to shake Liam, tell him that he needs to look out for himself. All in all though it's probably safer not to right now, seeing that they are traveling at high speed down the road and he knows that he doesn't have the right to anyway but the instinct to protect Liam is quite overwhelming. 

“I hear you're leaving for London soon? That's great news - I hope you find everything that you're looking for,” Liam says quietly, gripping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turn white. 

“Thanks...yeah the job is a wonderful opportunity for me.” 

Zayn is groaning inwardly at his own words. The atmosphere in the car is thick with repressed feelings and unspoken accusations. He can't think of a way to lighten the mood, so he settles down further into the seat, leaning his head against the window. 

“Do you mind if I go to sleep for a bit?”

“No, of course not. I'll wake you when we're near.”

Liam seems to be equally glad not to have to make more awkward small talk. Good - at least they can agree on something. 

The next thing Zayn is aware of is Liam repeatedly saying his name. He can’t quite work out if this is one of his regular dreams involving Liam or if it is reality. 

“Zayn, we’re here. We’ve just passed a sign with ‘Holmes Chapel three miles’ on it.”

Liam’s voice reaches Zayn now somewhat clearer. They are actually in this car together and shit, Zayn can feel that he has been drooling on his own shoulder - very attractive. He wipes his face with his hands in what he hopes looks like a casual gesture. 

“Where do we go now? Any idea?” Liam asks, slowing the car down to take the exit off the motorway. 

“No, not really,” Zayn admits, suddenly feeling very apprehensive about what he and Liam are trying to do. There is a reason why Zayn isn’t normally one for spontaneous decisions and this is it. If this quest goes as pear shaped as the ‘take Liam to the party’ idea, then god help them. 

“There are only two addresses listed under Styles in the local phonebook and even if Harry is not there, the people who live there might know where he is.”

This explanation has been plucked straight out of thin air but Liam seems to buy it,” Ok, you look up the address, I need to get some petrol.”

He pulls into the petrol station and fills up while Zayn brings up the postcodes on his phone. Without thinking he gently strokes the steering wheel with the tip of his fingers, pulling them away quickly when Liam returns. Get a grip Zayn!

“Where to then?” Liam wants to know, offering Zayn a piece of chewing-gum which he  
declines. 

“Let’s try this one first,” Zayn suggests, tapping the digits into the satnav. 

Liam starts the engine,“Shouldn’t we maybe call first? We could be making a wasted journey.”

“No, I’d rather explain myself in person if he is really here.”

“Alright, it’s your mission,” Liam nods, his features softening. 

The first house is posh, surrounded by huge, well kept gardens. They can drive as far as the large iron gate with an intercom. 

“Wow, he kept that quiet if this is where he lives,” Liam peeks through the windscreen with wide eyes. 

“Let’s just ring the bell and see.”

Zayn sincerely hopes that Harry doesn’t live in this place. It just doesn’t fit with the idea that he has formed in his mind. Not that Harry is obliged to conform to Zayn’s mental images, but still. They ring three times but there is no response from the speaker in front of them.

“Looks like nobody is in,” Liam says, stating the obvious,”Come on we try the other address,” he adds. 

“Yeah, might as well...I don’t even know why I thought this could work,” Zayn pushes a strand of his hair out of his face, blowing out a breath through his nose. 

“Hey chin up, you never know, we might get lucky with the next one,” Liam gently squeezes Zayn’s knee and Zayn’s dick takes that as an invitation to swell in anticipation. Can this body of his not give it a rest? It is not too much to ask for a little cooperation, is it? Liam looks hot as hell in his plaid shirt and jeans. His cologne makes Zayn’s head spin and it would be nice if those kind of temptations weren’t here right now, but no such luck. The universe is conspiring against Zayn and it’s just not fair.

The second house is a semi-detached on an average estate, well-kept with a small car parked on the driveway. Zayn approaches the door, knocking tentatively. The wind has picked up and it’s starting to drizzle. Fab, just the sort of omen he needs. He looks back to the car where he has left his leather jacket but decides that it’s not worth the bother to go and get it. 

Liam comes to stand next to him,” Any luck?” he asks. 

“Yeah look,” Zayn points to the closed door. Sometimes he wishes that sarcasm wasn’t always his go-to response when he is stressed but he can’t help it. 

His hopes for success sink further with every knock that remains unanswered. The old ‘Nirvana’ band shirt that he is wearing is slowly getting soaked and when he is about to give up, a light comes on inside the house and a dark haired woman opens the door. There is no doubt that this is Harry’s mother, the resemblance is undeniable.

“Yes? Can I help you?” she asks with a friendly smile. 

Zayn is too shaken to speak coherently. They have done it, they have found Harry’s home. 

“Um..I..we...is Harry here? Could we talk to him please...if he is here?” Zayn is fully aware that he sounds like a complete moron. 

The woman’s face looks more guarded now that she closes the previously wide open door a little,” He is not here I’m afraid. Can I give him a message?”

Her eyes dart back and forth between Zayn and somewhere inside the house. She is clearly lying but it’s her home and her son. Zayn is at a loss as to what he can say to persuade her to let them talk to Harry. 

“Mrs. Styles is it? My name is Liam and this is Zayn - we are friends of Harry’s. We don’t want to intrude and it’s ok if he doesn’t want to talk to us but could we maybe leave a note for him? We would be ever so grateful.” Liam intervenes, beaming at Harry’s mum - what a smooth talker.

“I’m not sure…,” Harry’s mother wavers when a voice from within the property cuts her off.

“Never mind mum, I got this,” Harry appears behind her, grinning at the visitors. He is dressed in joggers and a baggy t-shirt, the dark circles under his eyes belie the cheerful tone of his voice. 

“Come on in lads, I must admit that I wasn’t expecting you here.” He steps back to allow them to enter the house. 

He leads them through to a cosy living room. The large settee is covered in piles of folded clothes and Harry plonks himself into the only single armchair which leaves the two-seater sofa for Zayn and Liam. Zayn could swear that this is an intentional move by their host. 

“So why are you here guys? I take it this is not a social call?” Harry seems to be somewhat nervous, fiddling with a loose thread on the hem of his shirt. 

“There’s no good way to say this... it’s about Louis....he plans to marry Nick just over a week from now and you have to come back with us and stop him...that’s it.” The words fall from Zayn’s mouth in a desperate gush.

Harry stops fiddling with his hem and sits up straight. Zayn can practically follow the progress of him digesting the information by his rapidly changing facial expressions. 

“Oh Lou,” he whispers eventually and rests his elbows on his knees, hiding his face in his hands.

Zayn gives him a minute to compose himself, then he pleads,” Harry please, there is nobody else but you. Just talk to him - I don’t know what else to do. I know you got this new person but if there is any hope....”

“I’d like to try, honestly, but I don’t see the point,” Harry raises his face, giving Zayn an odd look,” Louis doesn’t trust me, he thinks I’m shallow and that I just wanted him as a distraction on my way to something better.”

“No, that’s not true...he is just so caught up in his idea of rescuing everyone in that gym and that he needs to stay with that manipulative asshole,” Zayn’s voice is sounding more and more desperate,” He loves you Harry. I know it is not up to me to tell you that but I see no other way to help him. The night of that dinner party, he was sobbing in my arms, saying over and over how much he loves you - you gotta believe me.”

Harry’s face would be comical in a less urgent situation. His jaw has dropped and he looks at Zayn in utter disbelief, remaining silent.

“He said that? Wow,” Liam chimes in, looking equally as astonished. 

“Shut up, Liam. You’re opinion on this is not required,” Zayn grunts not even making eye contact.

Harry glances at them curiously before replying,” I don’t doubt what you say,Zayn. After all, you being his best friend was the only consolation I had when I left.”

“So you don’t think they’re screwing?” Liam asks nonchalantly and Zayn wants to strangle him. Did he really just ask that? Is he actually trying to make this about him and Zayn?

“No mate, I've heard the rumours but no. They are two wandering souls who have found each other and are in complete harmony. If they were screwing, as you so eloquently put it, they would be shouting it from the rooftops,” Harry addresses Liam with an amused smile playing on his lips.” 

“Bloody hell Harry, no wonder Louis gets confused by what you say and if it’s bullshit or not,” Liam bursts out.

“Yeah I know, but what people fail to realise is that I very rarely say anything that I don’t mean,” Harry says wistfully, looking down at his hands. 

“So, have you made a decision?” Zayn asks, bringing the conversation back to why they are here in the first place. 

Harry makes some contemplative noises before he says,” Ok, I want to know in my heart that I did all I could. I’m gonna get changed then we can leave...oh and one of you will have to put me up for the night.”

“You can kip at my place as long as you want,” Zayn assures him. 

Harry is only gone for a couple of minutes during which Zayn and Liam resume their well practised routine of silently turning away from each other.

When he returns, Harry stands in front of his friends with his arms crossed over his chest,”Just one question before we go…”

Since Zayn and Liam are just looking at him, he continues,” What is going on with you two? When I last saw you, you got on quite well and now you can cut the tension in here with a knife. What I can’t work out is whether you want to kill each other or fuck each other.”

“Nothing is going on, we’re not even in contact normally. Liam wanted to help out, nothing more,” Zayn gets up and adjusts his t-shirt which has dried on his body and is now sticking uncomfortably to his skin.

“Right..I see.. If you say so...let’s go then,”Harry raises his eyebrows and says a quick goodbye to his mother before leaving the house with his two sullen mates in tow.

Liam advises Harry to get into the front passenger seat so that he has more room for his long legs, which Zayn views as a clear snub. So if this is how it’s gonna be - fine by him. Liam has been impossibly obnoxious ever since they got to Harry’s and Zayn is happy to just sulk in the backseat. But if he thought that the journey back home would be incredibly tense and awkward, he is pleasantly surprised.

Everyone, even Liam, is studiously avoiding all the inflammatory topics and Harry keeps the conversation flowing by talking about music, films and amusing stories from his life as a student.

The chatter in the car only ebbs off when they get close to Newcastle and the lights of the city become visible on the horizon. For the last few miles until they reach the house where Louis lives, they each immerse themselves in their own thoughts of what might be to come.

“What if he’s not home?” Harry’s voice suddenly cuts into the silence.

“He is,” Zayn says glumly,” He just messaged me back and he’s expecting me.”

“So he might actually slam the door in my face because I’m not you? Thanks Zayn,” Harry’s voice has a distinct nervous edge to it.

“We’ll soon find out because here we are,” Zayn reaches over Harry’s backrest to give his shoulder a quick, encouraging squeeze,” I’m gonna wait in the pub around the corner until you get in touch.”

Liam kills the engine a few houses down from Louis’ and they all exit the car to wish Harry luck, sending him on his way with emphatic handshakes and hopeful smiles.

Liam is standing next to his car, shuffling from one foot onto the other,” I guess I’ll be setting off for home then,” he says, shoving his hands into his jeans pockets. 

He looks lost and Zayn wants to say so many things to him but all that comes out is an awkward,” Yeah...um...thanks for doing this.”

“I told you that I wanted to help and besides --,” Liam’s voice trails off. 

“Besides?” Zayn asks, now looking directly into Liam’s eyes and what he thinks he can see in them is unsettling. 

“You must know that I would do anything for you, don’t you?” Liam holds Zayn’s gaze.

This is not the conversation they should be having. Zayn averts his eyes only for Liam to take both of his hands, pulling him closer. 

“Back at your flat, you talked about ‘us’ and ‘feelings for me’. What did you mean by that?” 

Despite the cold air, Zayn feels hot and Liam keeps pulling until their bodies meet.

“It’s pointless talking about that,” Zayn tries to regain some level of composure but being so close to Liam, drinking in his smell and feeling the heat radiating from his body through both of their shirts makes that impossible.

“You’re the one who brought it up, not me. I know that there is no future for us but I want you to tell me for once what you’re really thinking,” Liam cups Zayn’s right cheek, running his thumb over the stubble on his chin,” and why did you do that thing to me in the gym? Was that just a joke to you?”

“I was angry, Liam - I know I went too far but I wanted to have you and hurt you at the same time,” Zayn swallows hard. 

Fuck, why did he have to make that confession to Liam?

Liam wraps one arm around Zayn’s waist, putting their foreheads together.

“Well, you’ve succeeded...you’ve hurt me alright and just so you know, you making me come like that is all I can think about.”

Zayn can feel Liam’s heart racing and it matches his, beat by beat. If Liam was to make a move on him right now, he knows that he wouldn’t stand a chance of resisting him.

“I’m sorry about everything. You have to believe me that I never intended for any of this to happen but you don’t know who you are or what you want and I’m gonna protect myself from getting my heart ripped out again. Please try and understand…” Zayn slowly disentangles himself from Liam.

“I understand…,” Liam nods and gets into the car. He looks at Zayn one last time before he drives off, his wheels screeching on the wet asphalt and Zayn is fairly certain that he can see tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Goodbye,” Zayn whispers but every cell in his body screams Liam's name. 

When he can’t see the brake lights anymore, he turns and wipes away hot tears of his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for still reading this, It's been almost a year since I started.
> 
> Much love to all of you xx


	15. Chapter 15

Louis 

The tea in the mug is cold and the sandwich has been picked apart and scattered on the plate. Louis knows that he should eat something but he can’t. His stomach feels twisted and anything that he puts in would probably make an immediate unwelcome return. Earlier he left the gym through the backdoor after he had run out of tears and his sobs had subsided. Now he sits at the breakfast bar of Nick’s large kitchen, staring blankly at the black and silver colour scheme. Every surface is made of either marble or steel and everywhere is spotless since nobody actually cooks anything in here. Louis thinks vaguely how much this room represents his relationship with Nick - functional, sterile, all for show. He has been listlessly flicking through the wedding catalogue which he found on his bedside table. It’s all designer this and bespoke that - even the models look sad and disapproving or maybe that’s just his imagination. Louis desperately regrets his rash decision to agree to Nick’s marriage proposal. This afternoon he was sure that he is doing what he needs to do but now his future seems to be a huge abyss and he is unable to stop himself from falling into it. 

The hollow feeling worsens when he thinks about his best friend leaving for London. Zayn should be here any minute. Louis wasn’t surprised by his text but he didn’t think that he would turn up at the house. Normally he would have suggested a different meeting place but he couldn’t find the energy to give it any thought. He sincerely hopes that Zayn will accept his decision and not try to talk him out of it.

The ringing of the doorbell startles him even though he is expecting it. He slides down from his seat and opens the front door, ready to greet his friend but the words get stuck in his throat.

Instead of Zayn, Harry is standing there, smiling cautiously. 

“Can we talk?” Harry asks, sweeping his long locks back with his fingers. 

It’s such a familiar gesture that stabs at Louis’ heart. Harry is right there and he just casually wants to know if they can talk? Does he not realise how much anguish Louis has gone through because of him? Does he want to rub it in his face, reminding him what he has given up? None of that sounds anything like what Harry would do but why is he here then? 

Louis is still thinking that he might be hallucinating when he notices Liam and Zayn in the distance behind Harry. Looks like Zayn tricked him - with friends like that, who needs enemies?

He can’t get his voice to work, so he walks back into the house, leaving the door open. Harry follows him into the entrance hall and Louis feels anger rising in his chest.

“What do you want to talk about? Why you left me? Or why you didn’t waste any time consoling yourself with somebody else? Zayn and Liam obviously dragged you here to tell me what an idiot I am and you agreed, being the delusional fantasist that you are. In your mind you probably see yourself as the knight in shining armour, riding in on your white horse or in your case - in your white sports car. You should have saved yourself the trouble and stayed wherever you fucked off to.”

Louis has worked himself up into a rage. He thinks fleetingly that he sounds like a toddler in full tantrum mode but he can’t bring himself to care.

Harry remains motionless, fixing Louis with a stare that is difficult to interpret.

“Anything else?” he asks. “I admit that I handled it badly. I shouldn’t have done what I did at the dinner and I apologise for that but I swear I was never going to go through with it and sleep with Nick. How can you believe that I would do that?” Harry says quietly.

“Very easily as it happens,” Louis spits,” You know damn well what effect you have on others. You throw your charm around and make people think that you care and then you trample all over their feelings.”

“Louis, listen to me…,” Harry urges, reaching out to him.

“No, you listen to me,” Louis moves a few steps backwards,” I know that I made mistakes as well. Me stringing you along like that wasn’t right but what you did was nothing short of cruel. You already have the next guy lined up literally five minutes after you tell me that I mean something to you. And then you deliver the killer blow and make sure that I know about it. Your message ripped my heart apart...I hope that you’re satisfied.”

“No...Lou… you got it all wrong,” Harry strides forward before Louis can react and grabs him by the arms, forcing him to make eye contact. “I added that message because I thought you might understand what I’ve been trying to tell you for so long. I have found my ‘one’ - and it’s you...it’s always been you and that’s why I had to leave. Seeing you and knowing that you’re with him is more than I can bear. I can’t be in a relationship where there is no trust. For some reason you are ready to believe that I am just playing with you and that I shag whoever takes my fancy as soon as you turn your back. You believe anything rather than that I love you and that I want to spend my life with you.”

HARRY LOVES HIM

All other thoughts are vanishing and Louis’ head is swimming. Harry loves him and has loved him all this time. The realisation hits Louis like a brick. 

He frees his arms from Harry’s grip and throws them around his neck instead, raising himself onto his tiptoes which is a little bit embarrassing but right now unavoidable.

“Sorry...sorry...sorry,” he whispers again and again.” I am such a fool but why did you change your mind and came back?”

“Because you have a wonderful friend who told me that you may be fond of me too.” Harry wraps his long arms around Louis’ middle and lifts him off his feet, squeezing him tightly. 

“I should thank that little shit then I suppose.” Louis mumbles into the crook of Harry’s neck. 

“Yes, you really should.” Harry’s voice has dropped a few octaves as he puts Louis down, cupping his face with both hands. He locks his gaze on Louis’ eyes and Louis’ knees start to wobble. This onslaught of conflicting emotions is too much for him. How can his day go from utter despair to the greatest surge of joy he has experienced in his life? 

“I love you so much Harry and I can’t explain why I didn't tell you this earlier because I’ve known for a long time. Please don't leave me again…. I couldn't -” The rest of the sentence is cut short by the invasion of Harry’s tongue deeply into Louis’ mouth. 

The world around him seems to stop. Louis’ hands are exploring Harry’s body wherever he can reach; it’s just the two of them in their bubble of love and desire. Louis can’t hear or see anything beyond Harry which is probably to blame for the fact that neither of them notice a car stopping on the drive. 

“What the hell is going on here?” Nick stands in the still open door looking like he is about to combust.

Harry is trying to leave Louis’ embrace but Louis isn’t about to give him up so easily so they end up standing awkwardly in the entrance hall with their fingers entwined, waiting for Nick’s next move.

“How long has this been happening behind my back?” Nick’s face is distorted with anger.”How many times have you brought this manwhore into my home?”

“I haven’t and there is no need to insult him like that.”Louis lets go of Harry’s hand, glancing at him before approaching Nick.

Harry just stands there with that smirk that could mean anything. If he is offended, he doesn’t show it.

“You expect me to believe that?” Nick asks aggressively.

“You can believe whatever you want; I’m telling you the truth.” 

A sudden feeling of calm surges through Louis. Reassured by the knowledge of Harry’s love for him, he knows that he can now do what he should have done ages ago. 

“I’m leaving today Nick. I don’t want to endure this relationship any longer; it will be better for both of us.”

“You ungrateful bastard,” Nick snarls,” After all I have done for you - this is how you thank me?”

“Like stripping away who I am bit by bit and turning me into your puppet?” Louis snaps. 

“I’ve ploughed thousands into that business of yours and I can finish you just like that. I hope you can live with yourself when your beloved employees lose their job one at the time because you can no longer pay their wages.” A malicious grin appears on Nick’s face. 

Louis hesitates for a moment but a look at Harry, who winks at him, steers him back on course.

“I deal with that when the time comes. Your blackmailing attempt is not going to work. Have your lawyers contact me, if needs be I’ll sell up.” Louis is surprised by his own resolve. 

Harry comes over to him, putting a comforting arm around his shoulder which causes Nick to start cackling. 

“So you’re gonna hook up with a penniless student? Good luck with that my dear.” Nick strokes Louis’ hair in a condescending gesture and then turns his attention to Harry.

“You know that you’re inheriting a lousy shag, don’t you? And there I thought you have a more refined taste in sexual partners. We could have had fun, you and I.” A suggestive smile plays around Nick’s lips.

“No thanks, I think I’ll pass. For one thing I already know what a great lover Louis is and for another you should seriously consider to improve your seduction technique because it kinda sucks.” Harry delivers his little speech in a sweet tone and Louis can barely stop himself from giggling.

Nick is close to exploding if the protruding vein on his neck is anything to go by.

”Get out of my house and don’t even dream of trying to come crawling back. You two deserve each other and just so you know...I was never faithful. There were many guys who were very entertaining when I was away. I just kept you around because you are nice to look at - like an ornament.” Nick tries his best to be hurtful but his words literally bounce off Louis. 

He calmly removes the watch from his wrist and takes the house key off his key ring. Both items land on the shelf above the radiator, accompanied by a thump which somehow sounds final. 

“You will be hearing from me...this is not over,” Nick threatens, looking as if he can’t quite believe that Louis is the one who is breaking things off. 

Reasoning that any further conversation would be a waste of his breath, Louis gets his denim jacket from the close stand, takes Harry by the hand and walks out to his car without a backwards glance, waving dismissively in Nick’s direction.

After driving the short distance down the road and parking the car outside the place where Zayn is waiting to hear from Harry, Louis lets out a relieved sigh.

“Wow, that was intense but I did it,” he muses wistfully. “On the downside, I’m effectively homeless.”

This development should probably make him a little anxious but all he can detect within himself is a feeling of freedom and happiness.

“You did so well in there, really strong and dignified.” Harry leans over to plant a noisy kiss on his forehead. “Come on, let’s put Zayn out of his misery,” he adds.

They find their mutual friend huddled in the corner of a booth in the packed pub. He seems to be miles away with his thoughts. Louis has to shake him slightly to get his attention. 

“No prizes for guessing how it went, “Zayn quips with a huge grin spreading across his face. He reaches up, slapping Harry on the back and pulling Louis into a tight hug. 

“You haven’t heard the best part yet,” Louis reports, nudging Zayn over so he can sit down next to him. “Nick came home unexpectedly and caught us at a, shall we say….tender moment.”

Harry occupies the chair across from them, his eyes never leaving Louis for a second. 

Zayn looks at him in alarm. “That’s shit timing. What did he say?”

“Tried to threaten me with ruining the gym and said a load of insulting crap.” Louis shrugs. “But I don’t give a rats ass cause I’m happy and it’s all down to you and Liam.” He snuggles into Zayn’s side, glancing up at him, deep affection cursing though his body.

Now that he is closer to Zayn, Louis notices the red rims around his eyes. 

“What’s the matter love? You’ve been crying.”

“Have not...I don’t cry.” 

Zayn is far too defensive for this to be true. 

“Let me guess, it’s Liam. Where is he anyway, I thought he’d be here with you,” Louis asks, realising immediately that mentioning Liam was a wrong move.

“He’s gone...now can we talk about something else please?” Zayn hunches his shoulders, starting to caress the neck of his beer bottle. 

Louis knows from experience that there is zero point in pushing him further and when Harry gives him a questioning look, he shakes his head slightly, indicating for Harry to stay out of it.

“Ok babe, you can tell me some other time,” Louis says softly.

Zayn grunts something under his breath, continuing to focus on his beer which is the cue for Louis to change the topic.

“Since I have nowhere to live, I’m gonna sleep at the gym. The bed in the first aid room is fine while I look for a something more permanent. 

“I was planning on staying with Zayn, unless that bed you’ve mentioned is big enough for two?” Harry’s voice sounds hoarse, making it obvious what kind of images are forming in his mind.

Louis can feel the heat rising in his stomach at the thought of spending the night with Harry but at the same time he is concerned for Zayn, who seems to have switched off again. 

“Do you want us to stay with you? We don’t mind...honestly.” Louis coaxes a small smile out of Zayn.

“No Lou, I’ll stay here for a bit. You two enjoy yourselves and I absolutely don’t fancy third-wheeling - not my thing,” Zayn smirks, chugging down the last of his drink.

“Ok my love, if that’s what you want.”

Louis gives Zayn a light kiss on the head, squeezing his shoulder. In his peripheral vision, he can see Harry looking at them, smiling affectionately. How does he do it? When everyone else is quite happy to believe at least some of the rumours that are circulating...Harry isn’t. Louis’ heart swells yet again with immense love for him.

Giving Zayn’s hair a parting ruffle, he joins Harry in fighting his way out of the heaving venue. 

“I wish there was something we could do to help him,” Harry says as soon as they are safely outside.

Louis runs his hand up and down Harry’s arm.” Yeah, me too. I’ll talk to him tomorrow when he has had some time to think. Zayn’s thought processes when it comes to personal problems are slow but thorough. You will get to know that about him in time,” he says fondly.

“That just sounded like you’re inviting me to join your family.” Harry’s smile lights up his entire face as he he picks Louis up and swings him around.

“Put me down you bumbling idiot; it is inappropriate to treat your employer in such a disrespecting fashion,” Louis squeals.

Harry stops swinging and holds him close instead. “In that case isn’t it fortunate that I don’t work for you anymore? I’ve come to the conclusion that zumba instructor is not my calling and therefore I would like to submit my belated resignation. Thank you for the opportunity Mr.Tomlinson.”

“Resignation accepted Mr.Styles and now that we are no longer in a dependent relationship, would you mind very much if I took you to my gym and fuck you silly?” Louis has meant that to sound flippant but it comes out distinctly needy.

“I thought you’d forgotten all about that - Let’s go,” Harry moans near Louis’ ear.

They climb into the car and Louis hopes that the trembling of his fingers isn’t too noticeable when he turns the key in the ignition.

.....

“OH MY FUCKING GOD - I will never be able to unsee this shit.” Niall can probably be heard throughout the building as he retreats towards the door. Shielding his eyes with the back of his hand in mock disgust.

Louis takes pity on him and pulls the blanket over his and Harry’s bodies. He chuckles to himself, considering the scene that greeted the unsuspecting Niall when he entered the makeshift bedroom. The duvet had fallen off, exposing a naked Harry who is almost obscenely sprawled on his back with an equally unclothed Louis lying more or less on top of him, his bottom sticking out in the direction of the blushing swimming instructor. Surrounding them are their clothes, an open bottle of lube and two cum filled condoms which neither of them had bothered to dispose off properly last night.

“Serves you right for not knocking. You must have seen my car outside and anyway...it doesn’t do you any harm to widen your horizon,” Louis teases. 

Niall has his back to the room.”I wanted to discuss something work related with you, not have an introduction to gay sex” Niall snorts.

“Don’t knock it ‘till you’ve tried it,” Harry pipes up from somewhere under Louis.

“I’ve seen enough to last me a while, thanks,“Niall retorts. “I’ll talk to you when you’re decent, although I doubt that I’ll ever be able to look at you again without the image of your naked ass popping up in my head,” he huffs, closing the door with intended noise. 

“We better hit the shower before somebody else pays us a visit.” Louis gets up, stretches lazily and puts on his crumpled clothes.

“Together?” Harry grins, sitting on the edge of the bed, sorting through his hair with his fingertips.

“As much as I would like that, I think separate cubicles are a better idea,” Louis laughs,” You can borrow a shirt since yours is bearing the scars of last night’s incredible events.”

A short while later, a freshly showered Louis is greeting Zayn at the reception desk. Harry follows immediately behind, sporting a t-shirt that is too short and too tight.

“If you wanted to wear a crop top you should’ve asked one of the girls. I’m sure they would’ve helped you out.” Zayn glances at Harry’s outfit with raised eyebrows.

“Are you saying I can’t pull it off?” Harry asks, striking a dramatic pose. “Unfortunately my own shirt is covered in cum stains,” he adds in a deadpan voice. 

“Ew...too much information mate,”Zayn says, his features contorting into a grimace. “Niall is scarred for life, I think. He scurried past here, saying something about having to cleanse his mind.”

“Who knew that everyone around here is such a prude? We’re all adults aren’t we? And we don’t say anything when Niall practically sucks Sophia’s entire face off right in front of us, do we?” Harry mocks.

“ I heard that Styles, and I’m gonna ignore it because I know it comes from a place of deep admiration.”Niall arrives back at the desk, plonking himself on the seat next to Louis.

“Right,” Louis starts, “So what do you want to talk about? Or is it confidential?” He swings around to face Niall.

“Nope, nothing like that.” Niall takes in everyone’s expectant expressions.

“I was talking to Sophia and - -”

“Is that what they call it nowadays?” Harry chimes in which results in Niall smacking him in the back of his head”

“As I was saying...we talked and I found out that she isn’t overly keen to move to Ireland. She didn’t mention it earlier, because she thought that I had my heart set on it when actually I don’t really care. It was the obvious place for me to go but now that I have her, things are different. You know that it’s my dream to run my own place eventually but for now I was gonna ask if I could carry on working here for a bit?” Niall asks, searching Louis’ face for a reaction.

Instead of an answer, Louis engulfs him in a bear hug. “Why do you even think you have to ask? Of course you can work here as long as you want to.”In fact I have a proposition for you.”

“You do?” Niall can hardly contain his excitement.

“Yeah, I was thinking about what I should do next and I’ve decided to go back to plan A which is enrolling at uni for next year.” Louis explains, smiling widely at the approving mutterings from his friends.

Harry lets out a little ‘whoop’, hugging Louis from behind which causes him to half fall off his seat. 

Louis leans back into the hug and carries on laying out his plan.”If I resume my studies, I will need somebody to manage the gym for me and that’s where you come in Niall. By the time I finish my degree and find gainful employment, you will have sufficient experience to maybe buy this place at an extra special friend’s price. What do you say?” Louis’ question sounds hopeful with a slightly nervous undertone.

What if that’s not at all how Niall sees his and Sophia’s future? Louis’ fabulous plan doesn’t really consider that he might be making other arrangements and doesn’t want to waste his talents at a suburban business that is at best average.

However, he didn’t need to worry. Niall flushes profusely, gripping his hair with both of his hands.

“Are you for real? Man that would be such a fucking awesome deal.”

“Of course you will have to think it through, consult Soph and have a look at the books before you make a decision.” Louis shakes Niall’s outstretched hand. 

“I will, but I’m pretty sure that I want to do this,”Niall glows.

“I’m gonna go and get my stuff today.” Harry proceeds to put on his jacket. “My mum will give me a lift back. She’ll grumble a bit, but in the end, she will be happy not to have to listen to me gushing about Louis all day.”

“Do you think they will reinstate you on your course?” Niall asks. 

“Definitely...I’m their most promising student after all,” Harry says confidently. Then his face takes on a thoughtful expression.”My room will most likely be gone though.”

“You can have mine for now. I more or less live at Sophia’s place now,”Niall replies without being able to suppress a proud grin. 

“Right, that’s that sorted then.” Harry pulls Louis in for a lingering kiss, accompanied by the groans of their friends and a few curious looks from various gym members. 

“Come on, I’ll drop you at the station, before you two completely embarrass this establishment,” Niall offers, tugging at Harry’s sleeve. 

Playfully nudging their noses together one more time, Harry reluctantly lets go and accompanies Niall to his car.

Louis’ eyes follow Harry until he can’t see him anymore, a small smile playing on his lips. 

Zayn puts his arms around Louis’ shoulders, drawing him close. “You’ll never know how happy I am that it worked out with you and Haz.”

“And it’s all down to you, babe. You saved my life and if I didn’t already love you to bits, I would start now.” Louis fonds.

“By the way, I’m leaving at the end of this week.” Zayn blurts out. 

“That’s just a couple of days from now. I thought you were staying until your replacement has arrived.” Louis says , genuinely surprised. 

“The job comes with a nice flat, really posh and modern. I can move in when I’m ready and I think it will be good for me and Shuri to settle in a bit before work starts.” Zayn turns away from Louis, busying himself sorting the locker keys onto their respective hooks.

“You’re gonna miss your old place love, won’t you?” Louis says softly, hooking his chin over Zayn’s shoulder.

A sudden influx of people prevent any further conversation from happening. Louis gets out of Zayn’s way and watches him from the other end of the reception desk. He deals with the customers’ enquiries and concerns efficiently, smiling at every person, giving them his undivided attention. He is putting on a brave face but Louis knows he’s hurting and he wishes that he could make things better for Zayn. 

When all clients have been dealt with, Zayn joins Louis,” You should speak to Ed about taking over the flat. That way you and Harry have somewhere cheap to live, Ed gets ready made tenants and I can leave in the knowledge that my little flat is in good hands,” he suggests, clearly pleased with his idea.

“Zaynie, you’re a genius. Even if Harry doesn’t want to make that move so soon, it would give me a place of my own that doesn’t break the bank.” Louis props his feet up on one of the empty stools.

“Have you met Harry? His belongings will be there before you can blink.” Zayn smirks.

“Oh I hope so,” Louis lets out a long and heartfelt sigh, trying to make eye contact with his friend.

Louis is very aware of the fact that Zayn looks like he hasn't slept at all. 

“Please tell me where Liam is.” He decides to tackle the topic head on.

Zayn flinches a little. “I told you.. he’s gone. I’ve brushed him off again and that’s the end now.”

“He’s a good lad, Zaynie, Have you contacted him since yesterday? I mean he took you to get Harry, he must care.” Louis is still trying in vain to get Zayn to look at him. 

“Yes Lou, I have messaged him multiple times and he is not answering. You’re right, he is a good person but we are not good for each other. I’ve been an asshole to him because I don’t want to risk getting my heart broken and he values the opinion of his abusive father and his fucking so called friends more than anything else. I can’t face it anymore...I need to walk away and start afresh. I have landed a sick job and most importantly, you’re fine now. All in all, life isn’t too bad.” Zayn is facing Louis, his eyes pleading for understanding.

After that uncharacteristically long speech, Louis is at a loss as to what to say to him. Deep inside he knows that Zayn needs to make the move to London in order to get his life on track but that knowledge doesn’t make it any easier to let him go. Hopefully he will find someone special in the capital, who will love him unconditionally. 

“You know that I will always be here for you, right? Never forget that and we will visit each other often, yeah?” Louis gets up and goes to hug Zayn, who nods with a crooked grin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love to everyone who is still reading :)


	16. Chapter 16

Zayn

It’s Zayn’s last day at the gym and it has come around rather quickly. He prides himself on doing his job properly, so he sits behind the reception desk, writing a plan for the girl who takes over his position from tomorrow. As it turns out she is a very nice person who Zayn used to bump into from time to time at uni; she will fit in perfectly. He is doing his best to leave as much helpful information for her as possible. 

He has been inundated with well wishes from the regular clients every day since it became common knowledge that he is leaving. The displays of appreciation range from verbal ‘Thank Yous’ and slaps on the back to packets of cigarettes, bottles of booze and a pretty bra with an expertly cross stitched mobile number in one of the cups. He hasn’t bothered to check the records for the owner of that number. 

Louis and Harry will be moving into his flat as soon as the next day. Harry was predictably over the moon with this development and the only thing he had to whinge about was the lack of storage space for his ridiculously large collection of cooking equipment. Zayn never had this problem since his one pot and his wobbly frying pan always had plenty of room.

Thankfully there hasn’t been much time to think about Liam, but when he does a feeling of emptiness and loss comes over Zayn. Unknown to anyone else, Zayn has made several unsuccessful attempts to contact him with the ringing sound repeating itself until Zayn hits the ‘end call’ button and Liam’s name and number fade off the screen. 

The team are taking him to a new pizzeria and somewhere for drinks after. Zayn can't shake the heavy feeling of melancholy as he puts the finishing touches to his ‘Reception Manual’. 

He is startled by a soft squeeze to the nape of his neck and when he looks up, he sees Louis’ face on which the stern expression doesn’t quite match the soft look in his eyes. 

“Don’t ever ask me for a reference in the future because I would have to tell any prospective employer of yours that you’re incapable of following even the simplest instructions.”

Zayn furrows his brows in confusion. “I have no clue what you’re on about.”

“The box with my things? The one that I told you to get rid of? I went to the flat to see if we could fit in another wardrobe somewhere to house Harry’s outrageous amount of clothes and guess what I found? I tell you what - my books and my signed shirt.” Louis feigns annoyance whilst hugging Zayn tightly. 

“Lucky for you, I judge all of your instructions by how much sense they’re making and this one made zero. You can buy me a few drinks later. ” Zayn smirks, tickling Louis side, which makes him jump with a yelp. 

Zayn mentally congratulates himself on his decision to keep hold of the box.

As the last remaining customers leave the gym, Niall and Harry arrive, their heads stuck together in whispered conversation.

“What’s the conspiracy, lads?” Zayn wants to know.

Niall hesitates for a moment but then holds out a wad of documents towards Louis. “You need to take a look at this, Tommo. These are the financial reports for the gym - they don’t make good reading. I’ve attached notes, explaining what I’ve found.”

Harry moves closer to Louis, nodding reassuringly. 

Since this doesn’t appear to be good news, Louis sits himself down before sifting through the files in front of him. After a good twenty minutes, he looks like he understands what Niall is showing him.

“Wow guys, I didn’t expect that.” Louis throws the papers down on the counter. “Looks like Nick took more money out of the business than he put in. I only have myself to blame though, I gave him free reign - trusted him.” Louis shakes his head, clearly annoyed with himself.

“What an absolute tosser. Are you gonna do anything about it?” Zayn can’t believe that his very low opinion of Nick wasn’t quite low enough.

“No I’m just glad that I kicked him to the curb when I did. I want nothing more to do with him and just concentrate on my future now.” Louis’ fond glance at Harry warms Zayn’s heart. 

“Karma is a bitch and he will get what he deserves eventually. The universe is good like that.” Harry says.

“Very philosophical H but you’re right and I hope someone screws him over.” Zayn admits, ruffling Harry’s locks.

“Where is everyone anyway? I thought we have reservations - I’m starving.” Niall pointedly checks his watch.

Before anyone can reply, Josh saunters in. “I can answer that. Katie messaged me to say that Jess’ babysitter is late and the girls are gonna meet us at the pizza place.”

“Ok I'll just take these to the office and then we’ll go. Zayn can you lock up?” Louis picks the documents off the counter and throws Zayn the keys. 

Both of them are stopped in their tracks by a burly man bursting in through the entrance door. His face is red with anger as he crashes his fists onto the counter in front of Zayn. There is something inherently unpleasant about him even without the obvious display of aggression. His cold eyes move from face to face, his gaze finally coming to rest on Zayn.

“Since you seem to be the only Paki here you must be the one filling my son’s head with all that filthy rubbish,”he growls.

Zayn takes a step back. “I’m afraid I have no idea what you’re talking about,”he says, rooting around in his memory for any clue as to who this guy is.

“I’m talking about you luring my son into your house and then texting me some crap about him being drunk.

Shit, it’s Liam’s father! Zayn can feel his blood heating up his cheeks and bile rising in his throat. This is the bastard who has been inflicting so much pain on Liam and Zayn wants to scream at him, wants to know why he feels that he has the right to abuse his son. He clenches his fists, which results in a sharp pain from the keys still in his hand. He puts them in his pocket, schooling his features into a somewhat neutral expression. 

“Mr. Payne I take it? I can assure you that I am no longer in contact with your son so there is no reason for you to be here.” Zayn says, his hands raised defensively.

Liam’s father glares at him and leans further over the counter. “Why am I not the least bit surprised that you’re a liar as well,” he snarls and taking in Zayn’s puzzled expression he continues,”my son has ended the relationship with his beautiful girlfriend because he thinks that he likes guys now. Do you know how disgusting that is?”

That should be really hurtful but all Zayn can focus on is that Liam has apparently broken it off with Ellie. What is he meant to do with that information? Why did he do that? Is it even true?

“If I ever find out that you’ve been trying to talk to my son again, I will not be responsible for my actions.”

Zayn can sense everyone assembling behind him except Louis, who stays in front of the counter still clutching his documents.

Mr. Payne is now banging his enormous hands on the countertop. “I hope you got the message loud and clear. I’m not a violent man but…”

“That’s actually not what I’ve heard.” Louis says, approaching Liam’s father. “I think it’d be interesting to see what the local press would make of the successful Walter Payne’s domestic activities.”

Zayn thinks he can hear an anxious gasp coming from Harry as the large man surges towards Louis but then the door flies open and a very familiar figure walks in.

“Stop it Father! Leave him alone!” 

“Liam” - The name is barely a whisper when it rolls off Zayn’s lips. Someone must have heard it though because he can feel a comforting touch on his back.

Zayn is struggling to comprehend the scene in front of him. Perhaps he’s fallen asleep somewhere and his Liam starved soul is just conjuring up this image to torment him. 

But Liam is not a figment of his imagination. As always he looks amazing, dressed in a simple outfit of black jeans and a white t-shirt. There is something different about him though. Not only has he changed his hair to a buzzcut, which Zayn finds incredibly hot, he also holds himself completely differently. He is facing his father with a confident stance, his back straight and his shoulders squared. 

Unfortunately Zayn can’t kick the habit of checking Liam for obvious injuries as soon as he lays eyes on him and what he sees makes him swallow hard .There is a fresh cut on his jaw and a bandage covering his right forearm. Maybe if he was more of a hero, Zayn would go and give Walter Payne a taste of his own medicine right about now, but all he finds himself doing is standing and staring helplessly. 

“Liam - What are you doing here? Go home - I told you to stay at home.” Liam’s father roars, turning abruptly towards his son. Harry takes the opportunity to quickly grab Louis and drag him back to the relative safety of the area behind the counter.

“I won’t be taking any more orders from you and neither will I be coming home.” Liam’s tone is calm.

His father gulps audibly, obviously taken aback by what he is hearing. “You don’t know what you’re saying boy. Are you telling me that you’re choosing these lowlifes over your own flesh and blood?”

“These people are my friends father. Unlike you, they’ve accepted me as I am even though I behaved like a dickhead.” Liam briefly looks around into all the concerned faces but avoids Zayn.

Zayn can feel a lump forming in his throat and his cheeks burning. Has Liam been so hurt by their last encounter that he can’t even look at him now? 

“You have been brainwashed son. We don’t allow perverted stuff like this in our family” The angry man takes hold of Liam, his fingers digging into Liam’s shoulders. “We will go to Scotland to start over and you will forget all about this sordid little episode - you’ll see.”

Liam locks in on his father’s eyes, brushing the hands off. “I won’t be going anywhere with you...my things are in my car.”

“But why Liam? You’re all I have left...we’re family.” Mr.Payne is now resorting to whining.

Liam appears to be unmoved by his father’s plea. He takes a deep breath, looking like he is about to say something important. 

“Let me explain it to you then,”he grits out through clenched teeth. 

Zayn is not sure what it means when Liam looks at him, acknowledging his presence for the first time since he arrived. He thinks that he sees a faint smile playing around Liam’s lips but that could just be wishful thinking. 

And then Liam speaks.

“I’m in love with you Zayn,” he says softly. “I didn’t want to tell you like this but I need you to know before you leave. It’s ok that you don’t feel the same - I get that. I’ve treated you like shit and I can’t expect you to forgive me for that but I want to thank you for making me realise that I’m not a freak.” Liam rubs the back of his neck, his voice trailing off.

What?? Zayn thinks that he might actually die right here on the spot. His heart is constricting painfully and his thoughts are swirling around in his head in a fruitless attempt to make sense of Liam’s words. Why is he saying all these things? Is he doing it to shock his father? 

Zayn turns to search the faces of his friends for some answers. If he wasn’t so stunned, he would probably be amused by their varying reactions. 

Louis sports the most affectionate smile imaginable, Harry is pressing the palms of his hands to his chest, Niall punches the air and Josh looks rather confused.

The face of Liam’s father is drained of all colour as he gapes open mouthed at his son.

“You will regret this bitterly,” he erupts, poking furiously at Liam’s chest and as a final insult he adds,”just know that you’re no longer a son of mine.”

With that, Mr.Payne turns on his heel and leaves without imparting any more nasty bullshit.

Liam has his jaw clenched but he says nothing, making no attempt to follow his father. 

For the next thirty seconds or so the only noticeable sound is the ever present ticking of the big clock. Then Louis clears his throat, breaking the silence.

“Right then, we’re already plenty late for our dinner and the girls will be wondering where we are. Zayn, please don’t forget that Harry and I are moving into your flat tomorrow...not tonight...tomorrow. Oh, and remember to lock up. Liam, nice to see you...now come on lads, we have some pizzas to devour.” Louis grins from ear to ear, motioning for everyone to follow him out the back exit.

“We can’t go without Zayn,”Josh protests.

“We will have to abandon that mission and reschedule, Josh. Zayn is about to have a better offer, surely even you can understand that.” Louis looks back at the personal trainer urging him along with a flick of his head.

“How can we do that if he is the reason we're going in the first place?" Josh is no giving up so easily.

“God, where the fuck were you when sensitivity was handed out?” Niall has evidently run out of patience, dragging his reluctant friend with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's been such a long wait. Thanks so much i you're still reading this story.  
> Please leave a comment if you want to share your thoughts. xx


	17. Chapter 17

Zayn

When everyone else is gone, an uneasy silence descends over the reception area. Zayn considers the irony of the situation. Not so long ago, Louis told him off for being alone with Liam and now he couldn’t wait to leave them to their own devices.

Liam is standing by the door, looking a little lost. The earlier bravado seems all but gone. 

“Can you talk to me, please?” he says, glancing nervously at Zayn.

Zayn is still very much glued to the same spot he has been in since his world turned upside down about ten minutes ago. His brain is desperately trying to make contact with his mouth but it takes a while until he manages a shaky, “Are you ok?”

Liam looks up and brings his hand up to the injury to his jaw. “This? Yeah, it’s nothing. Max punched me after I told him and Ben that I’m gay and that I don’t want anything more to do with them. Don’t worry though, he got what he deserved. My training finally paid off.”

Liam’s cheeks flush slightly after that clear admission of his sexuality. Zayn can’t help flashing him a proud smile before his gaze falls onto the bandage.

“What about your arm?” he asks.

Liam’s blush intensifies as that cute bashful smile of his lights up his face.

“No, this is different - wanna see?” He asks with a hint of apprehension in his voice.

Zayn nods slowly and makes his way around the counter to have a look at whatever Liam wants to show him. 

Liam removes the bandage and reveals a brand new tattoo underneath. It’s some kind of phrase but Zayn has to come closer to read it because the letters are smudged with a mixture of vaseline and excess blood. When he finally takes in the meaning of the words, he can’t suppress a small gasp.

I figured it out… is etched into Liam’s skin in a somewhat scribbly style.

“You told me that one day something will be important enough to me that I want it engraved on my skin forever and you were right.” Liam gives Zayn a part expectant, part loving look.

Zayn ghosts his fingers over the writing which still looks quite raw and aggravated.

“This is amazing Liam,” he says, biting down on a smile as he remembers that those were the exact words that Liam said when he first noticed Zayn’s ink. 

He searches for Liam’s eyes before asking the burning question to which he might not want to hear the answer.

“Is it all for real then? What you said earlier?” He asks, his heart wrenching in his chest.

“Yes, I meant everything I said. I love you Zayn.” Liam says earnestly.

Zayn wants to grab Liam and never let him go but there is still more he needs to know.

“I was so full of jealousy every time I thought of you and her together. It was tearing me apart. I tried to get in touch with you - so many times. You could have said something, could have let me know that there was still hope.”

“I haven’t slept with her or anyone else since I saw you here the first time. You’re in my head - all of the time like I told you that night outside the club. I wasn’t lying and I didn’t get in touch because I had to work things out for myself - well with a little bit of help from Harry.” Liam admits.

Harry - of course. Zayn should have known that the self appointed ambassador for love and romance might get involved in his and Liam’s seemingly hopeless relationship. 

“You spoke to Harry recently?”

“Yes, we had a few chats and he made me understand that I never actually believed that you and Louis were together...like...you know, sexually. I was jealous as well... of what you have with him - the blind trust, the deep affection, the unwavering belief in your friendship. There is nobody like that in my life and I wanted that...want that.”The last words come out as a mere whisper.

“Oh Liam…” Zayn starts.

“Please let me finish or I might never have the guts again to ask this,” Liam cuts in.”Obviously we failed miserably at the friend thing the first time round, but I thought maybe you and I could message every once in awhile when you’re in London.”

Zayn takes a moment to compose himself before he answers.

“No Liam, I don’t want you to be my friend,” he says, his voice tight. 

The dejected look on Liam’s face is threatening to break Zayn’s heart. He reaches out, tenderly  
running his thumb from Liam’s jaw to his bottom lip.

“We’ve been a right pair of morons,” he says gently, putting their foreheads together. “I want you to be my world, my everything.”

He is just about able to take in Liam’s beaming smile before he finds himself engulfed in his arms and squeezed until he lets out a small squeak, signalling his inability to breathe. 

“I swear I will never hurt you again,” Liam releases him a little and is rewarded with a soft kiss.

“You are all I want.” Zayn hums against Liam’s throat.

Liam lets out a low moan before he asks,” What did Louis mean just then...about the flat?”

“He meant that we have it all to ourselves for tonight - if we want,” Zayn smirks.” “Do we?”

Instead of an answer, Liam takes Zayn by the hand and pulls him through the front door, giving him barely a chance to lock it.

The white sports car is parked very conveniently and very illegally right outside the entrance, the driver’s door wide open.

“That was stupid of you - someone could have nicked it,” Zayn remarks, settling into his seat.

“I was in a rush to rescue you.” Liam grins and slides behind the wheel, adjusting himself to accommodate his unmissable erection.

Looks like the anticipation is getting to him just as much as it is getting to Zayn, who is struggling to get his own bulge under control. Every journey that Zayn has made in this car has been memorable for one reason or another but this one has got to be the best. How they don’t get stopped will probably remain a mystery. Liam slows down drastically at every traffic light until it turns to red and he can bend across to exchange lingering kisses with his passenger. Zayn can’t stop grazing his fingers over Liam’s head which occasionally makes him swerve on the road. Somehow they arrive at Ed’s shop without having caused a major accident.

Liam parks more on the footpath than on the road but Zayn can’t be bothered to point out that this constitutes yet another traffic offence, since he has literally more pressing things on his mind. The sexual tension between them has been building up to unbearable levels during the car journey and as soon as both of them have bundled through the door to the staircase, Zayn finds himself backed up against the wall, pinned back by his shoulders. Liam is busy alternately kissing his face and sucking on his neck.

“This feels oddly familiar,” Zayn mumbles between hitched breaths.

Liam pulls back slightly, his face all serious,”About that...I...I never apologised for that...I.”

“S’fine, it was hot.” Zayn assures him, having to stop himself from laughing at Liam’s astonished expression.

“No, it wasn’t, it was vile,” Liam says, letting go of Zayn’s shoulders and stroking his face with both hands as if that could somehow undo his actions in the locker room.

Liam has a knack of wanting to have meaningful conversations in highly unsuitable situations. Zayn is trying to get this point across by impatiently pressing his crotch into Liam’s thigh but he is apparently waiting for an answer.

“Yeah it was but maybe I’m a little bit into that sort of thing, ok? Are we gonna do more soul searching now or are we going upstairs?” Zayn asks, using his newly freed hands to grip Liam’s ass. 

Maybe that will convince him that there is a limit to Zayn’s patience. His whole body is on fire and after all the stops and starts, all the vivid dreams, all the yearning, he really just wants Liam draped around him.

To Zayn’s relief, Liam gets it immediately. His lips form a silent ‘Oh’, pressing himself flush against Zayn.” Your keys?” he asks, his voice raspy.

“Right front pocket,” Zayn is able to moan as he digs his fingers into Liam’s hips.

Liam proceeds to immerse his hand into said pocket where he brushes repeatedly against Zayn’s dick before angling out the set of keys. Without further warning he scoops Zayn up, carrying him easily up the stairs. Zayn is slightly mortified by the way he clings a little too desperately to Liam’s neck but he doesn’t seem to notice. At the top Liam takes a second to identify the correct key, unlocks the door and pushes it open with Zayn’s bum before entering the flat. 

“Oi, that’s not very dignified.” Zayn protests without conviction.

Liam flat out ignores him and shuts the door the same way he opened it.

“You could never be anything but dignified,” he coos, putting Zayn gently down on his feet. 

“Flattery will get you everywhere,” Zayn replies, running his fingers yet again through Liam’s cropped hair.

A movement behind Liam catches Zayn’s eye. Shuri peeks out from in between two boxes, probably confused with all the comings and goings at the flat lately. She observes the scene in front of her for a minute and then jumps onto a box, ignoring the happy couple whilst curling up on what looks like one of Harry’s winter jackets. At the moment the flat resembles a badly organised warehouse. There are storage containers everywhere, some of which will be shipped off to Zayn’s new place. A few of the others hold Louis’ clothes but the majority are filled with Harry’s belongings. Zayn still can’t believe how one person can own so much stuff and how he was able to fit all of it into his room at uni. 

Liam brings his hand up to cradle the back of Zayn’s neck, pulling him closer. 

“I’m so happy that you finally know how I really feel but also so afraid that you’ll slip away from me again,”Liam whispers, pressing his body a little more urgently against Zayn’s. 

“I won’t slip anywhere, except with my tongue into your mouth maybe.” Zayn shows Liam immediately that he’s not kidding by attacking his lips with all the pent up passion he’s been harbouring for so long.

“Liam, now would be a good time to take me to bed ,”Zayn moans when he finally comes up for air.

Liam makes a sound that sends shivers down Zayn’s spine but at the same time goes completely still. Zayn steps back a little, searching Liam’s face for a hint as to what might have caused this change in mood. Liam’s eyes are downcast, his face a deep shade of red.

“Love, I’m sorry...we don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for,” Zayn says, feeling a sharp pang of guilt for putting pressure on Liam like that.

“No no...that’s not it. God, I want this more than anything but what if...what if I hurt you?” Liam runs his hand over his head, giving Zayn a worried look.

“Babe, I know that you’re well endowed down there but trust me, it’s nothing I can’t handle.”

Liam starts to giggle, nudging him lightly with his shoulder.

“Don’t be daft...I just mean that I have no experience with this...I might do it wrong.” Liam is clearly struggling to juggle his desire with his insecurity. 

“I tell you what,” Zayn proposes,”I’ll do the groundwork and you can do the rest, yeah?”

Not needing any further encouragement, Liam makes a strangled noise before reversing Zayn through the maze of boxes into the bedroom.

The back of Zayn’s knees hit the frame of his bed just before he falls backwards onto the mattress. Liam hovers over him, straddling his hips, his hands on either side of Zayn’s head. 

Zayn’s heart is thumping against his ribs. He has difficulty to grasp that this is actually happening and not a wonderful if cruel dream. Liam smothers him with deliciously wet kisses. Zayn closes his eyes, tilting his head back to allow Liam maximum access to his neck. They only break off long enough to quickly pull each other’s t-shirts off their heated bodies.

Liam might be new at the whole ‘man on man’ thing but his technique of nipping at Zayn’s skin from his throat down to the soft skin around his navel has Zayn squirming helplessly. Liam makes short thrift of removing the rest of Zayn’s clothes but doesn’t discard his own. Instead he drags his bottom lip over Zayn’s balls and his throbbing cock, licking up the heavily flowing pre-cum and looks up at Zayn with an innocent flutter of his eye lids. Zayn thinks he might pass out. 

“Fuck Liam...I can’t take much more. Please off…,” Zayn whines, tugging frantically at Liam’s trousers. 

“Is that good for you?” Liam says breathlessly whilst ridding himself hastily of his remaining clothes. 

“Yeah…,” Zayn gasps, bucking his hips as Liam takes in his length, swirling his tongue around the slit.

Zayn doesn’t want this to ever end but at the same time he desperately needs Liam on top and inside of him. 

“I’m so close Li,” Zayn whimpers...you have to stop...I...I want you to fuck me.”

Zayn takes Liam’s hot flushed cheeks into his hands, pulling him gently but firmly of his dick. Liam’s lips are glistening and swollen, his skin covered in beads of sweat and it’s the most beautiful sight Zayn has ever seen. It’s a bit of a challenge to drag his gaze away from Liam’s face and do what he promised he’d do but eventually he reaches over to his bedside table and extracts the things he requires from the top drawer. He chucks a condom in Liam’s direction, dropping the lube in the process. Cursing under his breath,he blindly searches around for it until he locates the missing item in the creases of his blanket.

With a well practised flick of his thumb he opens the small bottle and slicks up his fingers before reaching down between his own legs.

Liam appears to be utterly mesmerised. He is sitting back on his heels, rolling the condom on with trembling fingers. Watching Zayn with dark, glassy eyes, his broken moans fill the room as he stares at the x-rated scene in front of him.

Zayn could possibly come just from watching Liam stroking his own erection but that’s not how he wants this to go. He swats Liam’s fingers away from his dick, holding on to them with his free hand whilst fucking himself in preparation for what promises to be the highlight of his life so far.

Liam swallows hard, gripping Zayn’s hand tightly.

“Jesus Zayn, you’re so gorgeous...can I...are you ready? Show me how you like it,” he croaks.

Zayn doesn’t need to be told twice. He extracts his fingers carefully before he flips himself onto his front, enjoying the friction that rubbing his cock against the mattress provides. Only for a second though, because there is no way that he can wait a moment longer to give himself over to Liam completely. He tucks his knees in, keeping his head and torso down, thereby presenting Liam with his wet and perfectly prepared ass. 

The next thing that Zayn feels are Liam’s hands on his hips and the tip of Liam’s dick hesitantly entering him. Zayn pushes back to let him know that it’s ok what he is doing and to hurry things along a little which may be a tad selfish on his part but Liam feels amazing inside him. Obviously gaining courage from this, Liam bends down, covering Zayn’s back with his body. He thrust more confidently into Zayn now, even occasionally hitting his prostrate at the right angle. Liam comes with a shudder, whispering sweet nothings into Zayn’s ear. When he has regained control over his body, he shakily props himself up on one elbow, snaking his hand around Zayn’s hips. Without pulling out of him, he expertly moves his fist over Zayn’s length. Zayn fears that his heart might give out on him and the high pitched moan that escapes his throat is accompanied by a hot sticky mess covering Liam’s hand.

They lie like that for a little while trying to regulate their breathing before Liam rolls off Zayn and proceeds to turn him around, tangling their legs together. 

“Wow - I’ve imagined this so many times but I didn’t think it would be so amazing.” Liam traces his index finger along the contours of Zayn’s face. “Does this mean I can call myself your boyfriend now?”

“Nothing would make me happier.” Zayn takes Liam’s hand off his chin, planting small kisses on each of the fingertips. 

“You think it’s possible to have a long distance relationship? And make it work?” Liam asks quietly.

“I don’t know Liam,” Zayn says truthfully.” Have you thought about what’s next for you?”

“Yes, I think so - my business course finishes in a few weeks. I’m gonna see that through and then apply for uni and get some kind of part-time job I guess.”

Zayn knows exactly what he would like to say to Liam but is it asking too much too soon? 

In the end he ventures tentatively,“They have universities in London you know.”

Liam looks at him with wide eyes and Zayn can feel a mixture of hope and apprehension running through his body.

“You want me to move with you to London? Seriously?”

“Yeah...I understand if you say no...in fact forget I mentioned it...no idea what came over me...I…” Zayn knows that he is rambling without making much sense.

Liam puts a finger on Zayn’s lips. “Sh… I'd love to...but…” 

“But what?” Zayn holds his breath, anxiously waiting for a reply.

“I’ll come with you under one condition.” Liam says, the corners of his mouth twitching. It seems that he takes a fair amount of pleasure in keeping Zayn in suspense.

“What is ist? Don’t be a prick Liam - I don’t bare my soul, just for you to take the piss.”

“Liam smiles, his expression soft. He looks stunning like that, causing Zayn’s heart to skip a beat.

“I want to have my own place,” Liam explains,”because I’ve never lived by myself and also because I want to prove to myself and to everyone else that I’m capable of being my own man - that’s one reason.”

Zayn assumes that by ‘everybody else’ he means his father but he refrains from commenting.

“Fair enough - what’s the other? he asks instead.

Liam hooks his finger under Zayn’s chin, lifting it a fraction to make full eye contact.

“I want to date you properly and I can’t do that if we live together.”

“Babe, I have eaten your ass out and you have buried your dick into mine. Don’t you think it’s a little too late to worry about dating?”

Liam shakes his head, his face suddenly serious.

“No Zayn, that’s just sex.I have so much to make up to you. I want to take you out...treat you the way you deserve to be treated and show you how special you are...I want to learn every fascinating detail about you...in short I want to woo you.” 

Zayn’s insides are in real danger of melting. Just when he thought Liam couldn't get anymore wonderful, he says things like that. 

“To be honest I already consider myself one hundred percent wooed,” Zayn quips in an attempt to keep his overflowing emotions in check. 

“It’s not negotiable.” Liam supports his point with a deep kiss and Zayn can’t argue with such a compelling argument.

“Fine, so long as you’re near me,” he says a little breathlessly once their lips separate.

When he looks up at Liam it’s apparent that events have taken their toll on him as a wide grin spreads over his face and his eyes flutter shut.

“That’s that sorted then...I love you...so much...so so much...I…,”his voice fades until only his soft snores can be heard.

Zayn drops a kiss on the sleeping Liam’s temple before snuggling into his chest. 

Millions of thoughts are racing through his mind. How is it even possible that his life has taken pretty much a 360 degree turn for the better after so much drama. The man he loves is right here in his bed, he is about to start his dream job and his best friend has found true happiness as well. Surely there must be a catch? But no matter how hard he searches - he can't find one. 

The bedroom door squeaks open, signalling that Shuri is about to claim her usual spot on the end of the bed. She makes herself comfortable with a look that says ‘See, I knew he was a keeper’.

Zayn sighs contently and drifts off to the land of dreams to the beautiful sound of Liam’s steady heartbeat. 

 

.....

One year later…

Louis is the last one to arrive at the ‘Old Queen’s Head’. They have been meeting there once a month without fail, which has alleviated Louis’ fears that they would drift apart with almost everyone of them starting new chapters in their lives. It has been an adventurous year for Louis. Nick tried to sue him for a substantial amount of money but dropped his case when Louis confronted him with Niall’s findings concerning the gym’s financial history. 

After being his own boss for so long, Louis found adjusting to student life fairly challenging at first but he got his bearings soon enough and is now hardly able to contain his excitement about sharing his love for the English language with his future pupils in just a few years time. 

Moving in with Harry was the best decision he has ever made. Their relationship has been growing stronger every day and looking at Harry now, sitting at the table, talking animatedly to Niall about something or another makes Louis’ heart swell with love.

Harry has been working in Ed’s shop since they’ve moved into the flat, putting his natural charm to good use. According to Ed, customers frequently leave with more items than they came for and it is apparently all down to Harry’s powers of persuasion

When he reaches the table, he squeezes himself next to Harry into the booth. There is really never enough space for the six of them to sit comfortably but they love this table and have it reserved for their monthly get togethers. 

Across the table from them are Zayn and Liam practically on top of each other. They look like two puzzle pieces that fit perfectly together as they exchange longing glances and gentle touches. 

Liam hasn’t made much progress as far as the relationship with his father is concerned. Apparently they are in touch by email every so often but Walther Payne still refuses to acknowledge his son’s sexuality and Liam said that he can’t deal with him until that situation changes. 

“Can you all listen up please? We have something to tell you.” Zayn says rather formally after clearing his throat. 

“Wouldn’t have anything to do with the matching rings you’re wearing, would it?” Niall guesses, gesturing towards the thin silver bands on Zayn and Liam’s ring fingers.

Liam clearly can’t wait to announce the news, his face breaking out in one of his adorable crinkly smiles.”Yes, we’re engaged. It felt like the right thing to do now that I have finally moved in with Zayn. I wanted to let you all know sooner but Zaynie thought it would be better face to face.”

Lots of hugging and kissing ensues and even Josh, who is usually not very touchy feely, joins in. Louis is sure that he can see a tear rolling down Harry’s cheek. He is such a hopeless romantic - in love with love. 

“So, when is the big day?” Louis asks after everyone has settled back into their seats.

“We haven’t set one yet,” Zayn informs him,”we’ll wait until Liam has finished uni. We just needed to make this commitment to each other. I hereby invite you all to our belated party next month at our place.” Zayn grins, turning towards Liam to give him a kiss which leaves nobody in any doubt just how committed the two of them are. 

Niall proposes a toast followed by yet more hugging.

“What about you two?” Liam’s question is aimed at Louis and Harry.

“We’re impoverished students mate,” Louis laughs,” not that this fact prevents Harry from making all sorts of crazy plans but for now we just have to be madly in love without a piece of paper from the register office.”

“Hey, I’m gonna give you the wedding of the century so don’t mock me,” Harry does his best to put on an indignant face, failing miserably as soon as Louis blows him a kiss.

“You’re such a soppy git,” Josh shakes his head. “Am I really the only one around here who enjoys the single life? What’s wrong with you people?”

“You’re just saying that cause nobody can stand to be with your sorry ass longer than five minutes,” Niall scoffs, flicking a beer mat at Josh.

“Not true...I’m just very picky. I will take my time to find the perfect partner, unlike you lot.”Josh huffs with consternation.

“You keep telling yourself that,”Niall nods with faux benevolence. “Soph and I have decided to give the whole matrimony thing a miss. Neither of us want kids so we’re gonna focus on making the gym the most sought after address for fitness in town - and what the future holds - who knows.”

Louis tunes out of the ongoing squabbling, looking around the table at his group of friends. Niall is right, nobody can predict what the future will bring but from what he can see right at this moment, it doesn’t look too shabby for any of them.

 

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it the, guys. Thank you so much for reading. Your support means so much to me. xx

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading x  
> You can find me on Tumblr under guilty1dlove :)


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